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The four most important words in any marriage...
by Anonymous

The four most important words in any marriage...
"I'll do the dishes."
- Anonymous

Here are the opinions on which my facts are based.
- Anonymous PHOTO

The first sigh of love is the last breath of wisdom.
- Anonymous PHOTO

I want to thank my parents for everything I am today -
fat, miserable, and paranoid.
- Anonymous


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(Groom), take (Bride)'s hand and place your hand over hers.
Now, remember this moment and cherish it...
because this will be the last time you ever have the upper hand.
- Anonymous

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous

I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
- Anonymous


 

Everyone should have at least two friends -
one to talk to and one to talk about.
- Anonymous

He early on let her know who is the boss.
He looked her right in the eye and clearly said, "You're the boss."
- Anonymous humor

Always remember the three magic words: You're right dear.
- Anonymous

No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous

I have often wanted to drown my troubles,
but I can't get my wife to go swimming.
- Anonymous

My wife ran off with my best friend, and I sure do miss him.
- Anonymous

If at first you don't succeed,
skydiving is not for you.
- Anonymous

There are two times when a man doesn't understand a woman -
before marriage and after marriage.
- Anonymous

You can't make an omelet without breaking eggs.
- Anonymous

They have come up with a perfect understanding.
He won't try to run her life,
and he won't try to run his, either.
- Anonymous

Give a man one rabbit, and he will eat for a day;
give a man two rabbits, and he will
feed his family and his neighbors
and return you 64,768 rabbits in change.
- Anonymous

If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
- Anonymous

He who marries for love without money
has good nights and sorry days.
- Anonymous

Half the people you know are below average.
- Anonymous

When everything comes your way
you're in the wrong lane.
- Anonymous

Here's a toast to your new bride who has everything a girl
could want in her life, except for good taste in men.
- Anonymous

A honeymoon should be like a table:
four bare legs and no drawers.
- Anonymous

Confucius might have said:
Once frightened, twice smelly in armpit.
- Anonymous humor

Marriage is a sort of friendship recognized by the police.
- Anonymous

Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand.
- Anonymous

The person who says it cannot be done
should not interrupt the person who is doing it.
- Chinese proverb

Heaven must be an awfully dull place
if your best friends end up elsewhere.
- Anonymous

Do not use a hatchet to remove
a fly from your friend's forehead.
- Chinese Proverb

Forget love... I'd rather fall in chocolate.
- Anonymous

Join the army. Visit strange and exotic places.
Meet fascinating people. And kill them.
- Anonymous

Only dead fish swim with the stream.
- Anonymous

A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother
why the bride changed her mind.
What do you mean? responded her mother.
Well, she went down the aisle with one man,
and came back with another.
- Anonymous

Don't underestimate your abilities,
that's your boss's job.
- Anonymous

Whenever I find the key to success,
someone changes the lock.
- Anonymous

You can always do one thing less than you think you can.
- Anonymous

Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking.
- Anonymous

Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves
for they shall never cease to be amused.
- Anonymous

Only a fool tests the depth of the water with both feet.
- African Proverb

A lifelong friend is someone
you haven't borrowed money from yet.
- Anonymous

Hang tough... big girl panties today.
- Anonymous humor

God doesn't make junk.
- Anonymous

The enemy of my enemy is my friend.
- Arabic Proverb and Chinese Proverb

99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
- Anonymous

Happiness is often the result of being too busy to be miserable.
- Anonymous

Those who have free seats at a play hiss first.
- Chinese Proverb

I love my attitude problem.
- Anonymous

INDECISION is the key to FLEXIBILITY.
- Anonymous

Some days you're the dog,
and some days you're the hydrant.
- Anonymous

Computers happen.
- Anonymous

Talk doesn't cook rice.
- Chinese Proverb

If everything seems to be going well,
you have obviously overlooked something.
- Anonymous

Families are like fudge... mostly sweet with a few nuts.
- Anonymous

The light at the end of the tunnel
may be an oncoming train.
- Anonymous

A New Year's resolution is something that
goes in one Year and out the other.
- Anonymous

Life is uncertain; always eat dessert first.
- Anonymous

TEAMWORK...means never having to take all the blame yourself.
- Anonymous

Love is loving what your lover loves.
- Anonymous

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism.
To steal from many is research.
- Anonymous

Where there's a will, there's a way.
- old English proverb

You know your god is man-made when he
hates all the same people you do.
- Anonymous

Some husbands are living proof that a woman can take a joke.
- Anonymous

Politicians and diapers need to be changed regularly,
usually for the same reason.
- Anonymous

I know that God made the whole world in 4004 BC.
I know because my preacher told me. He's a good man.
He's even saving up all the money we give him
to go to bible college someday.
- Anonymous Humor

The most difficult phase of life
is not when no one understands you,
it is when you don't understand yourself.
- Anonymous

The early bird gets the worm,
but the second mouse gets the cheese.
- Anonymous

Love is what makes two people
sit in the middle of a park bench
when there is plenty of room at both ends.
- Anonymous

When life gets you down -
just put on your big girl panties and deal with it.
- Anonymous humor

You are only young once,
but you can stay immature indefinitely.
- Anonymous

The road to success is always under construction.
- Anonymous


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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