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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Hers Quotes
Funny Quotes about Hers

Let these funny Hers Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

(Groom), take (Bride)'s hand and place your hand over hers.
Now, remember this moment and cherish it...
because this will be the last time you ever have the upper hand.
- Anonymous

Here are the opinions on which my facts are based.
- Anonymous PHOTO

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living;
the world owes you nothing; it was here first.
- Mark Twain PHOTO

We have a great life here in Alaska,
and we're never going back to America again!
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)


 

Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove (1964)

What we've got here is failure to communicate.
- the movie Cool Hand Luke

Here's a toast to your new bride who has everything a girl
could want in her life, except for good taste in men.
- Anonymous


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If Christ were here now there is one thing
he would not be - a Christian.
- Mark Twain

"But I don't want to go among mad people," said Alice.
"Oh, you can't help that," said the cat. "We're all mad here."
- Lewis Carroll

Why wait until you're dead,
when you can create your own Hell right here and now.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Well excuse me - we've got something
a little unusual going on here -
time travel, parallel universes,
or just a little common ordinary insanity.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

And you, Sonja, you look more beautiful
standing here than you do in person.
- the movie Love and Death (1975)

You're only here for a short visit.
Don't hurry. Don't worry.
And be sure to smell the flowers along the way.
- Walter Hagen

If a man is called to be a street sweeper,
he should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted,
or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry.
He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts
of heaven and earth will pause to say,
here lived a great street sweeper who did his job well.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Okay, here's your first lesson: how to take a FALL!
- the movie Karate Kid

Those who have come here to hate should leave now;
for in their hate, they only betray themselves.
- Terry Goodkind

Be here now.
- Ram Dass

Life may not be the party we hoped for,
but while we are here we might as well dance.
- Anonymous

Here is a test to find whether your mission on earth is finished:
If you're alive, it isn't.
- Richard Bach

It is a mark of soulfulness to be present in the here and now.
When we are present, we are not fabricating inner movies.
We are seeing what is before us.
- John Bradshaw

And now here is my secret, a very simple secret:
It is only with the heart that one can see rightly;
what is essential is invisible to the eye.
- Antoine de Saint-Exupery

Don't hurry. Don't worry.
You're only here for a short visit.
So don't forget to stop and smell the roses.
- Walter Hagen

We are here to awaken from the illusion of our separateness.
- Thich Nhat Hanh

Part of our essential humanity is paying respect to what God gave us
and what will be here a long time after we're gone.
- William J. Clinton

You can choose to be peaceful right here and now ...
it has nothing to do with what other people do or think.
- Gerald Jampolsky

The best way to enhance freedom in other lands
is to demonstrate here that our democratic system
is worthy of emulation.
- Jimmy Carter

The world is a better place because I am here.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life is a constant opponent,
and an overpowering adversary if attacked directly.
The successful and happy ones dance lightly with life -
a parry here, a feint there - always engaged,
but never in the direct line of life's heaviest blows.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

This moment! - this here-now - is forgotten
when you start thinking in terms of achieving something.
When the achieving mind arises,
you lose contact with the paradise you are in.
- Osho

Could you risk believing that everything
will unfold just fine if you completely let go
of all concern about everything else,
and simply are here, now - if only for a moment?
- Dmitri Bilgere

"Good morning!" he said at last.
"We don't want any adventures here, thank you!
You might try over The Hill or across The Water."
- J. R. R. Tolkien

Service to others is the rent you pay
for your room here on earth.
- Muhammad Ali

Here with a Loaf of Bread beneath the Bough,
A Flask of Wine, a Book of Verse - and Thou
Beside me singing in the Wilderness -
And Wilderness is Paradise enow.
- Omar Khayyam

The buck stops here.
- Harry S. Truman

The past is no more and the future is not yet.
The only right person is one who lives moment to moment,
whose arrow is directed to the moment,
who is always here and now; wherever he is,
his whole consciousness, his whole being,
is involved in the reality of here and in the reality of now.
- Osho

Here in America we are descended in blood
and in spirit from revolutionists and rebels.
Men and women who dare to dissent from accepted doctrine.
As their heirs, may we never confuse
honest dissent with disloyal subversion.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

Our creator is the same and never changes
despite the names given Him by people here
and in all parts of the world.
Even if we gave Him no name at all,
He would still be there, within us,
waiting to give us good on this earth.
- George Washington Carver

For as long as I can remember, I've been searching for something,
some reason why we're here. What are we doing here? Who are we?
If this is a chance to find out
even just a little part of that answer...
I don't know, I think it's worth a human life. Don't you?
- the Jodie Foster movie Contact (1997)

Walk on road, hmmm?
Walk left side, safe. Walk right side, safe.
Walk middle, sooner or later get squish just like grape.
Here, karate, same thing.
Either you karate do "yes" or karate do "no."
You karate do "guess so," squish just like grape. Understand?
- Miyagi: character in the movie Karate Kid

Love is what we were born with.
Fear is what we learned here.
Miracles occur naturally as expressions of love.
The real miracle is the love that inspires them.
In this sense everything that comes from love is a miracle.
- Marianne Williamson

You always have everything you need, right here, right now.
Do you know how I know? You're still here.
If you hadn't always been given everything you ever needed,
you wouldn't be here.
- Neale Donald Walsch

The world is a better place because I am here;
the energy that I radiate into this world
is a gift beyond my own understanding.
Through ME, an all encompassing Love enters this world;
and I am profoundly grateful that the Powers of Light
have chosen ME to be a conduit for Infinite Love.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Where am I? Who am I? How did I come to be here?
What is this thing called the world?
How did I come into the world?
Why was I not consulted?
And If I am compelled to take part in it,
Where is the director? I want to see him.
- Soren Kierkegaard

Every decision you make - every decision -
is not a decision about what to do.
It's a decision about Who You Are.
When you see this, when you understand it, everything changes.
You begin to see life in a new way.
All events, occurrences, and situations
turn into opportunities to do what you came here to do.
- Neale Donald Walsch

I believe in everything until it's disproved.
So I believe in fairies, the myths, dragons.
It all exists, even if it's in your mind.
Who's to say that dreams and nightmares
aren't as real as the here and now?
- John Lennon

It's not the situation that's causing your stress,
it's your thoughts,
and you can change that right here and now.
You can choose to be peaceful right here and now.
Peace is a choice,
and it has nothing to do with
what other people do or think.
- Gerald Jampolsky

Seek always to do some good, somewhere.
Every man has to seek in his own way to realize his true worth.
You must give some time to your fellow man.
For remember, you don't live in a world all your own.
Your brothers are here too.
- Albert Schweitzer

It is good to realize that if love and peace can prevail on earth,
and if we can teach our children to honor nature's gifts,
the joys and beauties of the outdoors will be here forever.
- Jimmy Carter

It's YOUR time - it's YOUR life -
YOU get to choose how you use it. T
here is no way that your life is "supposed" to be.
Your parents had their vision for your life.
Your boss, your spouse, your church, your friends,
and even the family next door have their ideas
of how you should live your life.
What about YOUR vision for your life?
What do YOU want?
YES, it matters what you want.
YES you can have what you want.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I am trying to own my own opinions
and offer what I know as an option,
just as I would present a tray of appetizers for my guests.
Here are several choices that I have created -
if one looks good you are welcome to take it.
In other words, I am training myself to say,
"May I tell you how it is for me?"
When I ask the question, it means waiting
for the invitation to share.
It also means being prepared for my friend to say,
"No." They don't want to know.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

It was like being in the eye of a hurricane.
You'd wake up in a concert and think,
Wow, how did I get here?
- John Lennon

Literature is my Utopia. Here I am not disenfranchised.
No barrier of the senses shuts me out from
the sweet, gracious discourses of my book friends.
They talk to me without embarrassment or awkwardness.
- Helen Keller

A fool is one who goes on trusting;
a fool is one who goes on trusting against all his experience.
You deceive him, and he trusts you;
and you deceive him again, and he trusts you;
and you deceive him again, and he trusts you.
Then you will say that he is a fool, he does not learn.
His trust is tremendous; his trust is
so pure that nobody can corrupt it.
Be a fool in the Taoist sense, in the Zen sense.
Don't try to create a wall of knowledge around you.
Whatsoever experience comes to you,
let it happen, and then go on dropping it.
Go on cleaning your mind continuously;
go on dying to the past so you remain in the present here-now,
as if just born, just a babe.
- Osho

It is hard enough to remember my opinions,
without also remembering my reasons for them!
- Friedrich Nietzsche

It would be insane for me to
lose sleep over the opinions of others.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The greatest deception men suffer is from their own opinions.
- Leonardo da Vinci

Tell me about a person's family, friends, and community,
and I'll tell you what his opinions are.
- Mark Twain
(paraphrase)

By giving us the opinions of the uneducated,
journalism keeps us in touch
with the ignorance of the community.
- Oscar Wilde

Man tends to treat all of his opinions as principles.
- Herbert Sebastian Agar

Unless they share our opinions,
we seldom find people sensible.
- Francois de La Rochefoucauld

Having a personal opinion is great.
Believing that one's personal opinion is absolute truth
leads to most of the world's troubles.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Peace is a daily, a weekly, a monthly process,
gradually changing opinions,
slowly eroding old barriers,
quietly building new structures.
- John F. Kennedy

Few people are capable of expressing with equanimity
opinions which differ from
the prejudices of their social environment.
Most people are even incapable of forming such opinions.
- Albert Einstein

We cling to our own point of view,
as though everything depended on it.
Yet our opinions have no permanence;
like autumn and winter, they gradually pass away.
- Zhuangzi

Resilience is about believing in yourself,
and trusting your own wisdom rather than
being swayed by the opinions of others.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Believe in yourself, and trust your own wisdom
rather than being swayed by the opinions of others.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

We may have our private opinions
but why should they be a bar to the meeting of hearts?
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

One accurate measurement is worth a thousand expert opinions.
- Grace Hopper

Don't be trapped by dogma -
which is living with the results of other people's thinking.
Don't let the noise of other's opinions
drown out your own inner voice.
- Steve Jobs

We seek opinions that are likely to
support what we want to be true.
- Thomas Gilovich

I never will, by any word or act, bow to the shrine of intolerance
or admit a right of inquiry into the religious opinions of others.
- Thomas Jefferson


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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.