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Government Quotes and Sayings
Funny Quotes about Government

What people often mean by getting rid of conflict
is getting rid of diversity,
and it is of the utmost importance
that these should not be considered the same.
- M. P. Follett

Related topics: Wisdom Cynical Political Openness Acceptance Unity

Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.
- Will Rogers

You have not converted a man because you have silenced him.
- John Morley

DON'T get officious.
You're not yourself when you're officious -
That is the curse of a government job.
- the movie Harold and Maude (1971)

You can put wings on a pig,
but you don't make it an eagle.
- William J. Clinton

I wanted to see exotic Vietnam, the jewel of Southeast Asia.
I, uh, I wanted to meet interesting
and stimulating people of an ancient culture,
and kill them.
- the movie Full Metal Jacket

You want a friend in Washington? Get a dog.
- Harry S. Truman

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I am a man of fixed and unbending principles,
the first of which is to be flexible at all times.
- Everett Dirksen

When a stupid man is doing something he is ashamed of,
he always declares that it's his duty.
- George Bernard Shaw

Things have never been more like the way they are today in history.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

For those who do not think,
it is best at least to rearrange
their prejudices once in a while.
- Luther Burbank

Modern cynics and skeptics... see no harm in paying those
to whom they entrust the minds of their children
a smaller wage than is paid to those to whom
they entrust the care of their plumbing.
- John F. Kennedy

It does me no injury for my neighbor to say
there are twenty gods or no God.
- Thomas Jefferson

Those who play with the devil's toys
will be brought by degrees to wield his sword.
- R. Buckminster Fuller

For me every ruler is alien that defies public opinion.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

The very ink with which all history
is written is merely fluid prejudice.
- Mark Twain

I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God,
visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children
to the third and fourth generations.
- Exodus 20:5

Speeches that are measured by the hour
will die with the hour.
- Thomas Jefferson

The moral arc of the universe
bends at the elbow of justice.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

"Appeasement" is the policy of feeding your friends to a crocodile,
one at a time, in hopes that the crocodile will eat you last.
- Franklin D. Roosevelt

How does it become a man to behave
towards the American government today?
I answer, that he cannot without disgrace be associated with it.
- Henry David Thoreau

If the machine of government is of such a nature
that it requires you to be the agent of injustice to another,
then, I say, break the law.
- Henry David Thoreau

I don't advise a haircut, man.
All hairdressers are in the employment of the government.
Hairs are your aerials.
They pick up signals from the cosmos,
and transmit them directly into the brain.
This is the reason bald-headed men are uptight.
- the movie Withnail & I

We have the best government that money can buy.
- Mark Twain

When I am abroad, I always make it a rule never to
criticize or attack the government of my own country.
I make up for lost time when I come home.
- Winston Churchill

Loyalty to country ALWAYS.
Loyalty to government, when it deserves it.
- Mark Twain

The natural progress of things is for liberty
to yield and government to gain ground.
- Thomas Jefferson

The worst government is often the most moral.
One composed of cynics is often very tolerant and humane.
But when fanatics are on top there is no limit to oppression.
- H. L. Mencken

Never stir up litigation.
A worse man can scarcely be found than one who does this.
- Abraham Lincoln

Politics is almost as exciting as war, and quite as dangerous.
In war you can only be killed once, but in politics many times.
- Winston Churchill

A fool and his money are soon elected.
- Will Rogers

Interesting.
You Earth people glorify organized violence for 40 centuries,
but you imprison those who employ it privately.
- the character Spock in the television series Star Trek

I can make more generals, but horses cost money.
- Abraham Lincoln

A prisoner of war is a man who tries to kill you and fails,
and then asks you not to kill him.
- Winston Churchill

A good politician is quite as unthinkable as an honest burglar.
- H. L. Mencken

The speed of communications is wondrous to behold.
It is also true that speed can multiply
the distribution of information that we know to be untrue.
- Edward R. Murrow

The power of an air force is terrific
when there is nothing to oppose it.
- Winston Churchill

War is a game that is played with a smile.
If you can't smile, grin.
If you can't grin, keep out of the way till you can.
- Winston Churchill

I am neither bitter nor cynical but I do wish
there was less immaturity in political thinking.
- Franklin D. Roosevelt

Patriotism is the virtue of the vicious.
- Oscar Wilde

Money, not morality, is the principle commerce of civilized nations.
- Thomas Jefferson

Nobody ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public.
- H. L. Mencken

Authority has every reason to fear the skeptic,
for authority can rarely survive in the face of doubt.
- Robert Lindner

Politicians and diapers need to be changed regularly,
usually for the same reason.
- Anonymous

The inherent vice of capitalism
is the unequal sharing of blessings;
the inherent virtue of socialism
is the equal sharing of miseries.
- Winston Churchill

What do I think of Western civilization?
I think it would be a very good idea.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Credulity - willingness to accept
unsupported statements without demanding proof -
is the greatest ally of the dictator and the demagogue.
- Arthur C. Clarke

The lawyer's truth is not Truth,
but consistency or a consistent expediency.
- Henry David Thoreau

A lot of presidential memoirs, they say, are dull and self-serving.
I hope mine is interesting and self-serving.
- William J. Clinton

Our loyalties must transcend our race, our tribe,
our class, and our nation;
and this means we must develop a world perspective.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

I am sorry to say that there is too much point to the wisecrack
that life is extinct on other planets
because their scientists were more advanced than ours.
- John F. Kennedy

All warfare is based on deception.
- Sun Tzu

Socialism is a philosophy of failure,
the creed of ignorance,
and the gospel of envy,
its inherent virtue is
the equal sharing of misery.
- Winston Churchill

The enemy of my enemy is my friend.
- Arabic Proverb and Chinese Proverb

A riot is, at bottom, the language of the unheard.

If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?
- Abraham Lincoln

You can always count on Americans to do the right thing -
after they've tried everything else.
- Winston Churchill

In war, you can only be killed once,
but in politics, many times.
- Winston Churchill

A nation that is afraid to let its people
judge the truth and falsehood in an open market
is a nation that is afraid of its people.
- John F. Kennedy

It may be true that the law cannot make a man love me,
but it can keep him from lynching me,
and I think that's pretty important.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

The sweltering summer of the Negro's legitimate discontent
will not pass until there is
an invigorating autumn of freedom and equality.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

War is mainly a catalogue of blunders.
- Winston Churchill

Credit is a system whereby a person who can't pay
gets another person who can't pay
to guarantee that he can pay.
- Charles Dickens

History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely
only after they have exhausted all other alternatives.
- Abba Eban

I want to be the white man's brother, not his brother-in-law.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

A good indignation brings out all one's powers.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Never forget that everything Hitler did in Germany was legal.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

These capitalists generally act harmoniously and in concert,
to fleece the people.
- Abraham Lincoln

Almost any sect, cult, or religion will
legislate its creed into law
if it acquires the political power.
- Robert A. Heinlein

The man who reads nothing at all
is better educated than the man who reads nothing but newspapers.
- Thomas Jefferson

I believe totally in a Capitalist System,
I only wish that someone would try it.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie"
until you can find a rock.
- Will Rogers

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