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Winston Churchill Quotes and Sayings
Funny Quotes by Winston Churchill

You have enemies? Good.
That means you've stood up for something,
sometime in your life.
- Winston Churchill

Related topics: Wisdom Values Cynical Funny Cute Whimsey Courage Value Self

No crime is so great as daring to excel.
- Winston Churchill

Men occasionally stumble over the truth,
but most of them pick themselves up
and hurry off as if nothing had happened.
- Winston Churchill

I am easily satisfied with the very best.
- Winston Churchill

We have always found the Irish a bit odd.
They refuse to be English.
- Winston Churchill

For my part, I consider that it will be found much better
by all parties to leave the past to history,
especially as I propose to write that history myself.
- Winston Churchill

One does not leave a convivial party before closing time.
- Winston Churchill

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I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
- Winston Churchill

I am prepared to meet my Maker.
Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal
of meeting me is another matter.
- Winston Churchill

There are two things that are more difficult
than making an after-dinner speech:
climbing a wall which is leaning toward you
and kissing a girl who is leaning away from you.
- Winston Churchill

Personally, I'm always ready to learn,
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill

Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak;
courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.
- Winston Churchill

A joke is a very serious thing.
- Winston Churchill

When you have to kill a man,
it costs nothing to be polite.
- Winston Churchill

We are stripped bare by the curse of plenty.
- Winston Churchill

I am fond of pigs.
Dogs look up to us.
Cats look down on us.
Pigs treat us as equals.
- Winston Churchill

Short words are best
and the old words, when short, are best of all.
- Winston Churchill

In those days he was wiser than he is now;
he used to frequently take my advice.
- Winston Churchill

I'm just preparing my impromptu remarks.
- Winston Churchill

History will be kind to me for I intend to write it.
- Winston Churchill

I like a man who grins when he fights.
- Winston Churchill

Never hold discussions with the monkey
when the organ grinder is in the room.
- Winston Churchill

I cannot pretend to be impartial about the colors.
I rejoice with the brilliant ones, and
am genuinely sorry for the poor browns.
- Winston Churchill

Ending a sentence with a preposition is
something up with which I will not put.
- Winston Churchill

"No comment" is a splendid expression.
I am using it again and again.
- Winston Churchill

The best argument against democracy is
a five-minute conversation with the average voter.
- Winston Churchill

In the course of my life, I have often had to eat my words,
and I must confess that I have always found it a wholesome diet.
- Winston Churchill

The power of man has grown in every sphere, except over himself.
- Winston Churchill

In war, you can only be killed once,
but in politics, many times.
- Winston Churchill

Really I feel less keen about the Army every day.
I think the Church would suit me better.
- Winston Churchill

Although prepared for martyrdom,
I preferred that it be postponed.
- Winston Churchill

There are a terrible lot of lies going about the world,
and the worst of it is that half of them are true.
- Winston Churchill

I am bored with it all.
- Winston Churchill

The inherent vice of capitalism
is the unequal sharing of blessings;
the inherent virtue of socialism
is the equal sharing of miseries.
- Winston Churchill

Too often the strong, silent man is silent only because
he does not know what to say, and is reputed strong
only because he has remained silent.
- Winston Churchill

Politics is almost as exciting as war, and quite as dangerous.
In war you can only be killed once, but in politics many times.
- Winston Churchill

A fanatic is one who can't change his mind
and won't change the subject.
- Winston Churchill

We are all worms. But I believe that I am a glow-worm.
- Winston Churchill

This report, by its very length, defends itself
against the risk of being read.
- Winston Churchill

He has all of the virtues I dislike,
and none of the vices I admire.
- Winston Churchill

I always seem to get inspiration and renewed vitality
by contact with this great novel land of yours
which sticks up out of the Atlantic.
- Winston Churchill

My wife and I tried two or three times in the last 40 years
to have breakfast together,
but it was so disagreeable we had to stop.
- Winston Churchill

The length of this document defends it well
against the risk of its being read.
- Winston Churchill

I always avoid prophesying beforehand,
because it is a much better policy to prophesy
after the event has already taken place.
- Winston Churchill

A prisoner of war is a man who tries to kill you and fails,
and then asks you not to kill him.
- Winston Churchill

I am always ready to learn
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill

However beautiful the strategy,
you should occasionally look at the results.
- Winston Churchill

War is mainly a catalogue of blunders.
- Winston Churchill

Mr. Attlee is a very modest man.
Indeed he has a lot to be modest about.
- Winston Churchill

If Hitler invaded hell
I would make at least a favorable reference
to the devil in the House of Commons.
- Winston Churchill

Although personally I am quite content with existing explosives,
I feel we must not stand in the path of improvement.
- Winston Churchill

Those who can win a war well can rarely make a good peace
and those who could make a good peace
would never have won the war.
- Winston Churchill

Everyone has his day and some days last longer than others.
- Winston Churchill

When I am abroad, I always make it a rule never to
criticize or attack the government of my own country.
I make up for lost time when I come home.
- Winston Churchill

Man will occasionally stumble over the truth,
but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.
- Winston Churchill

In wartime, truth is so precious that she
should always be attended by a bodyguard of lies.
- Winston Churchill

The power of an air force is terrific
when there is nothing to oppose it.
- Winston Churchill

I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning
I will be sober and you will still be ugly.
- Winston Churchill

You can always count on Americans to do the right thing -
after they've tried everything else.
- Winston Churchill

War is a game that is played with a smile.
If you can't smile, grin.
If you can't grin, keep out of the way till you can.
- Winston Churchill

Eating words has never given me indigestion.
- Winston Churchill

There is no such thing as public opinion.
There is only published opinion.
- Winston Churchill

Socialism is a philosophy of failure,
the creed of ignorance,
and the gospel of envy,
its inherent virtue is
the equal sharing of misery.
- Winston Churchill

I have taken more out of alcohol
than alcohol has taken out of me.
- Winston Churchill

It is more agreeable to have the power to give than to receive.
- Winston Churchill

If the Almighty were to rebuild the world and asked me for advice,
I would have English Channels round every country.
And the atmosphere would be such that
anything which attempted to fly would be set on fire.
- Winston Churchill

It is a good thing for an uneducated man to read books of quotations...
The quotations, when engraved upon the memory, give you good thoughts.
They also make you anxious to read the authors and look for more.
- Winston Churchill

A politician needs the ability to
foretell what is going to happen
tomorrow, next week, next month, and next year.
And to have the ability afterwards
to explain why it didn't happen.
- Winston Churchill

My rule of life prescribed as an absolutely sacred rite
smoking cigars and also the drinking of alcohol
before, after and if need be during all meals
and in the intervals between them.
- Winston Churchill

You Quotes and Sayings

A true friend is someone who
thinks that you are a good egg
even though he knows that
you are slightly cracked.
- Bernard Meltzer

Never interrupt someone doing what you said couldn't be done.
- Amelia Earhart

You do not need anyone's permission to be your true self.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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