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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Head Quotes
Funny Quotes about Head

Let these funny Head Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

I got a good mind to join a club
and beat you over the head with it.
- the Groucho Marx movie Duck Soup

Clear? Huh. Why a four-year-old child
could understand this report.
Run out and find me a four-year-old child,
I can't make head or tail of it.
- the Groucho Marx movie Duck Soup

Crazy is walking down the street
with half a cantaloupe on your head,
muttering; "I'm a hamster, I'm a hamster."
- the movie Spy Hard (1996)

His answer trickled through my head like water through a sieve.
- Lewis Carroll


 

Life does not consist mainly,
or even largely, of facts or happenings.
It consist mainly of the storm of thoughts
that is forever flowing through one's head.
- Mark Twain

Life is a game.
Keep it light and playful.
Tease life, taunt life,
never attack life head-on.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Fine art is that in which the hand, the head,
and the heart of man go together.
- John Ruskin


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Let the rain kiss you.
Let the rain beat upon your head with silver liquid drops.
Let the rain sing you a lullaby.
- Langston Hughes

Hatred is an affair of the heart; contempt that of the head.
- Arthur Schopenhauer

A film is never really good unless the camera is an
eye in the head of a poet.
- Orson Welles

It is any day better to stand erect
with a broken and bandaged head
then to crawl on one's belly,
in order to be able to save one's head.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

No one realizes how beautiful it is to travel until
he comes home and rests his head on his old,
familiar pillow.
- Lin Yutang

Love is of all passions the strongest,
for it attacks simultaneously the head,
the heart and the senses.
- Lao Tzu

The heart, not the head, must be the guide.
- Arthur Erickson

The bookful blockhead, ignorantly read With loads of
learned lumber in his head.
- Alexander Pope

It is better to have your head in the clouds,
and know where you are...
than to breathe the clearer atmosphere below them,
and think that you are in paradise.
- Henry David Thoreau

Humor is merely tragedy standing on its head with its pants torn.
- Irvin S. Cobb

Overall the fundamentals seem to be there and he's
obviously got a very mature head on his shoulders.
He's got a kind of presence.
- Nick Price

The doctors x-rayed my head and found nothing.
- Dizzy Dean

Genuine forgiveness does not deny anger but faces it head-on.
- Alice Duer Miller

Ten soldiers wisely led will beat a hundred without a head.
- Euripides

You don't lead by hitting people over the head -
that's assault, not leadership.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

The career of a sage is of two kinds:
He is either honored by all in the world,
Like a flower waving its head,
Or else he disappears into the silent forest.
- Lao Tzu

If a man empties his purse into his head,
no man can take it away from him.
An investment in knowledge always pays the best interest.
- Benjamin Franklin

Trust that little voice in your head that says 'Wouldn't
it be interesting if...';
And then do it.
- Duane Michals

Never bend your head. Always hold it high.
Look the world straight in the eye.
- Helen Keller

People make a big fuss over you when you're President.
But I'm very serious about doing everything I can
to make sure that it doesn't go to my head.
- Jimmy Carter

If you talk to a man in a language he understands,
that goes to his head.
If you talk to him in his language,
that goes to his heart.
- Nelson Mandela

All perception of truth
is the detection of an analogy;
we reason from our hands to our head.
- Henry David Thoreau

There is a wisdom of the head, and a wisdom of the heart.
- Charles Dickens

They can shout down the head of the physics department at Cal Tech.
- James Stockdale

Many a man curses the rain that falls upon his head,
and knows not that it brings abundance
to drive away the hunger.
- Saint Basil

A wise man should have money in his head,
but not in his heart.
- Jonathan Swift

The glory of gardening: hands in the dirt,
head in the sun, heart with nature.
To nurture a garden is to feed not just on the body,
but the soul.
- Alfred Austin

A good head and a good heart
are always a formidable combination.
- Nelson Mandela

AUM, the most primordial human sound -
and the sound most connected to Spirit,
is pronounced in these three parts:
A (as in mama) - a throat sound
that vibrates in the abdomen - signifies waking.
U (as in who) - a tongue sound
that vibrates in the chest - signifies dreaming.
M (as in mama) - a lip sound
that vibrates in the head - signifies sleeping.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

A designer is only as good as the star who wears her clothes.
- Edith Head

There was endless action - not just football,
but sailboats, tennis and other things:
movement.
There was endless talk - the ambassador at the head
of the table laying out the prevailing wisdom,
but everyone else weighing in with their opinions and taking part.
- Charles Spalding

There are choirs singing in your head.
If you listen, you will hear the music.
It is the song of angels.
Pay no attention to the sounds of the world.
They are just noises, and even when
added up all together
they have no value, make no sense.
Strain to hear the song of angels.
Listen to the melody within your soul.
- Neale Donald Walsch

Never make your home in a place.
Make a home for yourself inside your own head.
You'll find what you need to furnish it -
memory,
friends you can trust, love of learning,
and other such things.
That way it will go with you wherever you journey.
- Tad Williams

This whole force is utterly demoralized by victory.
There seems to be neither head nor tail.
- Charles Ferguson Smith

I'm trying to keep a level head.
You have to be careful out in the world.
It's so easy to get turned.
- Elvis Presley

When I was there, something clicked in my head;
I found myself interviewing people,
searching out facts and figures.
Later on I became much more self-conscious of what I was doing.
- Joe Sacco

I spent a lot of time with a crown on my head.
- Halle Berry

People have to learn sometimes not only how much the heart,
but how much the head, can bear.
- Maria Mitchell

I think that there are fiction writers for whom that works well.
I could never do it.
I feel as if, by the time I see that it's a poem,
it's almost written in my head somewhere.
- Sharon Olds

Then I heard another shot which hit him right in the head,
over here, and his head practically opened up and a
lot of blood and many more things came out.
- Abraham Zapruder

I worked with such concentration and focus and I had
hundreds of obscure engineering or programming things in my head.
I was just real exceptional in that way.
- Steve Wozniak

If you look at the various strategies available for
dealing with a new technology,
sticking your head in the sand is not the most plausible strategy.
- Ralph Merkle

The best way to turn a woman's head is to tell her
she has a beautiful profile.
- Sacha Guitry

Shuddering under the autumn stars, each year,
the head sinks lower and lower.
- Georg Trakl

The Goth character was a difficult thing to get my head round.
I'm not really a fan of Goth music.
I'm more a piano and guitar man - that's what I love.
- Richard Fleeshman

But Barry, to me, is head and shoulders above everybody.
- Marcus Allen

Later on, there were some problems with our navy,
so he made me the head of the navy -
all things that I hardly knew anything about.
I was basically an ignorant young man.
- Shimon Peres

Swollen in head, weak in legs, sharp in tongue but empty in belly.
- Mao Tse-Tung

There's not ever much of anything going on in my head.
- Carrie Underwood

I have a mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it.
- Groucho Marx

I've never been arrested.
I've been stopped, searched and had a gun put to my
head by the Chicago cops.
- Tim Meadows

Waking up with a bad head in the morning is difficult sometimes.
- Caroline Corr

At a flea market I always head for the junk jewelry table first.
- Ethel Merman

Many people are target people.
Once when Louis B. Mayer insulted me I poured a glass of water over his head.
- Hedy Lamarr

You're gonna have to learn to get out there in front
of those cameras and hold your head up.
Take charge when you're singing.
- Patsy Cline

People say that the Beavis voice doesn't sound like me or some other voices.
Butt-Head I think sounds like me.
- Mike Judge

The mass of the people commence life with no other
capital than the union of head,
hearts and hands.
To the benefit of this best of capital the wife has no right.
- Ernestine Rose

In action a great heart is the chief qualification.
In work, a great head.
- Arthur Schopenhauer

If you really want to kill yourself,
you get a gun and blow your head off.
- Lorna Luft

In fact, I had the idea because of Peter Falk.
I saw my dad watching a Peter Falk movie and something clicked in my head.
I gotta go make a movie for Peter Falk and me.
- Paul Reiser

He was making all kinds of sounds apparently with his mouth,
and shaking his head and I thought, gosh,
is he trying to stop the orchestra? Is it all wrong?
It was just unbelievable.
- Robert Ripley

On my visits back home, if they saw that I was getting a big head,
they'd let me know right away.
- John Ratzenberger

As for fame, it can go to your head and you can become full of yourself.
- John Fahey

We will not go.
The only way to get us there is to come in here with
clubs and knock us on the head,
and drag us out and take us down there dead.
- Morning Star


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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.