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Funny Clear Quotes
Funny Quotes about Clear

Let these funny Clear Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

Clear? Huh. Why a four-year-old child
could understand this report.
Run out and find me a four-year-old child,
I can't make head or tail of it.
- the Groucho Marx movie Duck Soup

The wine of youth does not always
clear with advancing years;
sometimes it grows turbid.
- Carl Jung

Before moving on, you have to clear away your cherished beliefs.
- Dick Raymond

Keep your attention focused entirely
on what is truly your own concern,
and be clear that what belongs to others
is their business and none of yours.
- Epictetus


 

I used to tell my husband that,
if he could make me "understand" something,
it would be clear to all the other people in the country.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Living in fear of anything is a terrible waste
of what could be a great life.
If you live in fear of losing your job,
either you fear the embarrassment of being jobless,
or you fear the loss of material goods -
house, car, and such.
If you live in fear of losing your stuff and money,
it is clear that they own you.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Smiling away your troubles requires
a clear conscience that harbors no insincerity.
- Paramahansa Yogananda


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Be clear with yourself about what you mean
in conversations with others, and especially with yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Design works if it's authentic, inspired,
and has a clear point of view.
It can't be a collection of input.
- Ron Johnson

When your values are clear to you, making decisions becomes easier.
- Roy E. Disney

Open your mind, open your heart,
and the way to joy becomes clear.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Whenever God wakes in us, our thinking
becomes clear - nothing is missing.
- St. Thomas Aquinas

Keep close to Nature's heart...
and break clear away, once in awhile,
and climb a mountain or spend a week in the woods.
Wash your spirit clean.
- John Muir

One's mind has a way of making itself up in the background,
and it suddenly becomes clear what one means to do.
- A. C. Benson

Those who desire to rise as high as our human condition allows,
must renounce intellectual pride, the omnipotence of clear thinking,
belief in the absolute power of logic.
- Alexis Carrel

Be clear that expectations are demands.
Demanding that life turn out the way we prefer
is a sure path to disappointment and suffering.
Happiness lies in having no expectations,
and accepting life as it comes.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The water in a vessel is sparkling;
the water in the sea is dark.
The small truth has words which are clear;
the great truth has great silence.
- Rabindranath Tagore

Art is science made clear.
- Wilson Mizner

We must make it clear that a platform
of "I hate gay men and women'
is not a way to become president of the United States.
- Jimmy Carter

And let's be clear: It's not enough just to limit ads
for foods that aren't healthy.
It's also going to be critical to increase marketing
for foods that are healthy.
- Michelle Obama

The purpose is clear. It is safety with solvency.
The country is entitled to both.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower {political}

Your visions will become clear only
when you can look into your own heart.
Who looks outside, dreams;
who looks inside, awakes.
- Carl Jung

Truth is by nature self-evident.
As soon as you remove the cobwebs of ignorance
that surround it, it shines clear.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

One movement toward light becomes a clear signpost on a long road.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

To keep the body in good health is a duty...
otherwise we shall not be able
to keep our mind strong and clear.
- The Buddha

Arguments are healthy.
They clear the air.
- John Deacon

When love and hate are both absent
everything becomes clear and undisguised.
- Osho

There is no pillow so soft as a clear conscience.
- French Proverb

By polluting clear water with slime you will never
find good drinking water.
- Aeschylus

The things that have acquired unity are these:
Heaven by unity has become clear;
Earth by unity has become steady;
The Spirit by unity has become spiritual;
The Valley by unity has become full;
All things by unity have come into existence.
- Lao Tzu

So that the record of history is absolutely crystal clear.
That there is no alternative way, so far discovered,
of improving the lot of the ordinary people that can
hold a candle to the productive activities that are
unleashed by a free enterprise system.
- Milton Friedman

This Administration has led us into an area without vision.
Bush has no clear understanding of what is being asked of the citizens,
and the military is under his direction.
- Martin Sheen

I've always been clear, I support the traditional definition of marriage.
- Stephen Harper

I quit drinking, so I can think clear.
When you have chop trouble, drinking doesn't help the healing process.
- Freddie Hubbard

Five or ten years ago, when it was clear the Internet
was becoming a mainstream phenomenon,
it was equally clear that a lot of people were being
left out and could be left behind.
- Steve Case

Matisse was very clear about saying that you have to
blow your own trumpet and explain yourself,
which I think has been slightly forgotten.
- Howard Hodgkin

I'm fortunate that the books sell, but even more fortunate to live in Chatham,
to be very happily married and to have,
on the whole, a fairly clear conscience.
- Bernard Cornwell

It's clear that we need comprehensive immigration reform.
- Bob Inglis

It now becomes clear why the Bush Administration has
been vigorously opposing congressional hearings.
The Bush Administration has been engaged in a conspiracy of silence.
- Cynthia McKinney

Intuition is the clear conception of the whole at once.
- Johann Kaspar Lavater

Mind can never be intelligent - only no-mind is intelligent.
Only no-mind is original and radical.
Only no-mind is revolutionary - revolution in action.
The mind gives you a sort of stupor.
Burdened by the memories of the past,
burdened by the projections of the future,
you go on living - at the minimum.
You dont live at the maximum.
Your flame remains very dim.
Once you start dropping thoughts,
the dust that you have collected in the past,
the flame arises - clean, clear, alive, young.
Your whole life becomes a flame,
and a flame without any smoke.
That is what awareness is.
- Osho

It's clear that science and science fiction have overlapping populations.
- Frederik Pohl

Our age is before all things a practical one.
It demands of us all clear and tangible results of our work.
- Theodor Svedberg

If the scholar feels that he must know everything about any topic,
he is in trouble - and will not publish with a clear conscience.
- Kenneth L. Pike

The voice of conscience is so delicate that it is easy to stifle it;
but it is also so clear that it is impossible to mistake it.
- Madame de Stael

At the rate we're going, the 21st century looks pretty clear.
It's going to be pretty violent.
- Edward James Olmos

I wanted to clear all the lies and let the truth come out.
I have hate crawling through my system.
- Aileen Wuornos

If Saddam rejects peace and we have to use force,
our purpose is clear.
We want to seriously diminish the threat posed by Iraq's
weapons of mass destruction program.
- William J. Clinton

For me it is completely clear that our air bases in
Germany would be available to the Americans.
- Helmut Kohl

Our aims are absolutely clear: They are a high living
standard in the country and a secure,
free and comfortable life.
- Vladimir Putin

Ignorance of one's misfortunes is clear gain.
- Euripides

For every complex problem there is an answer that is clear,
simple, and wrong.
- H. L. Mencken

Well, for me, really, I think it was I wanted to try
and clear up some of the misperceptions that were out
there and fill in some of the historical gaps.
- Monica Lewinsky

The trouble with lying and deceiving is that their
efficiency depends entirely upon a clear notion of
the truth that the liar and deceiver wishes to hide.
- Hannah Arendt

In order for answers to become clear,
the questions have to be clear.
- Abdolkarim Soroush

Lyrics are very different.
There is a clear line between that and a poem.
Something that has been a source of great excitement
and delight for me is this idea that I get to rhyme.
- Joanna Newsom

As far as the sovereignty of Bosnia-Hercegovina is
concerned we agreed to have limited sovereignty for
a limited time and that is clear from the Dayton Agreement.
- Alija Izetbegovic

It is astonishing what force, purity,
and wisdom it requires for a human being to keep clear of falsehoods.
- Margaret Fuller

To have his path made clear for him is the aspiration
of every human being in our beclouded and tempestuous existence.
- Joseph Conrad

When you want to make it clear to the rest of the world
that you are not an imperialist,
the best countries to have with you are Britain and Spain.
- Bill Maher

But, when Scripture makes a clear distinction between
the act of creation and the process of preservation,
we cannot accept the idea of a progressive creation process.
- Walter Lang

I'm talking about science on the leading edge,
where it's not clear which way things are going be cause we don't know,
and I'm dealing with areas which we don't know about.
- Rupert Sheldrake

And if you're not going to have a clear health threat,
you don't want to panic people.
- William Scranton

I don't want anything to get in the way of me and my singing.
I want my mind as clear as possible.
- Bobby McFerrin

I'm not ready to give you a clear answer on whether
electoral politics holds any particular hope for progressives.
It would mean that nothing I did ever mattered.
- Tom Hayden

Sometimes I get worried I'm getting too caught up in
the nauseatingly oily smoothness of my own line,
when all I'm trying to do is make it as clear as possible.
- Chris Ware

Yes, I'm religious.
God has shown me things, made certain ways clear to me.
- Richard Pryor

A good puzzle, it's a fair thing.
Nobody is lying.
It's very clear, and the problem depends just on you.
- Erno Rubik

It's very clear that the Bush Administration is out of control.
It contains some truly dangerous people.
- John Pilger

It is becoming clear that the old platitudes can no longer be maintained,
and that if we wish to improve our morals we must first improve our knowledge.
- Havelock Ellis

All things will be clear and distinct to the man who does not hurry;
haste is blind and improvident.
- Titus Livius


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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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