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Let these funny Doris Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
A friend encourages your dreams and offers advice -
but when you don't follow it,
they still respect and love you.
- Doris Wild Helmering
The proper office of a friend is to side with you
when you are in the wrong.
Nearly anybody will side with you when you are in the right.
- Mark Twain
A friend is someone who will bail you out of jail.
A best friend is the one sitting next
to you saying "boy was that fun."
- The Maugles
My wife ran off with my best friend, and I sure do miss him.
- Anonymous
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A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend -
and he's a priest.
- Erma Bombeck
A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
- Erma Bombeck
The feeling of friendship is like that
of being comfortably filled with roast beef;
love, like being enlivened with champagne.
- Samuel Johnson
The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet
and steady and loyal and enduring a nature
that it will last through a whole lifetime,
if not asked to lend money.
- Mark Twain
You want a friend in Washington? Get a dog.
- Harry S. Truman
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
- Groucho Marx
Barf: I'm a mog: half man, half dog. I'm my own best friend!
- the movie Spaceballs (1987)
I was the kid next door's imaginary friend.
- Emo Phillips
A true friend is one who
overlooks your failures
and tolerates your success.
- Doug Larson
A loyal friend laughs at your jokes
when they're not so good,
and sympathizes with your problems
when they're not so bad.
- Arnold H. Glasgow
The enemy of my enemy is my friend.
- Arabic Proverb and Chinese Proverb
I never considered a difference of opinion
in politics, in religion, in philosophy,
as cause for withdrawing from a friend.
- Thomas Jefferson
Do not use a hatchet to remove
a fly from your friend's forehead.
- Chinese Proverb
I'm a very loyal and unreliable friend.
- Bono
A lifelong friend is someone
you haven't borrowed money from yet.
- Anonymous
A true friend stabs you in the front.
- Oscar Wilde
Except in cases of necessity, which are rare,
leave your friend to learn
unpleasant things from his enemies;
they are ready enough to tell them.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
This day I will marry my friend,
the one I laugh with, live for, dream with, love.
- Anonymous
The walls we build around us to
keep sadness out also keeps out the joy.
- Jim Rohn
A friend is someone who knows all about you,
and loves you just the same.
- Elbert Hubbard
The price of freedom for a nation is lives and money.
Often, the price of freedom for an individual
is challenging the closed minds of family and friend.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A true friend is someone who
thinks that you are a good egg
even though he knows that
you are slightly cracked.
- Bernard Meltzer
The most called-upon prerequisite of a friend is an accessible ear.
- Maya Angelou
Farewell My Friend
It was beautiful as long as it lasted
The journey of my life.
I have no regrets whatsoever
save the pain I'll leave behind.
Those dear hearts who love and care...
And the strings pulling at the heart and soul...
The strong arms that held me up
When my own strength let me down.
At every turning of my life
I came across good friends,
Friends who stood by me,
Even when the time raced me by.
Farewell, farewell my friends
I smile and bid you goodbye.
No, shed no tears for I need them not
All I need is your smile.
If you feel sad do think of me
for that's what I'll like
when you live in the hearts
of those you love, remember then
you never die.
- Gitanjali Ghei
The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that
they can grow separately without growing apart.
- Elisabeth Foley
The language of Friendship is not words, but meanings.
It is an intelligence above language.
- Henry David Thoreau
The happiest moments my heart knows are those in which
it is pouring forth its affections to a few esteemed characters.
- Thomas Jefferson
The finest kind of friendship is between people
who expect a great deal of each other but never ask it.
- Anonymous
I never found a companion that was
so companionable as solitude.
- Henry David Thoreau
The key is to keep company only with people who uplift you,
whose presence calls forth your best.
- Epictetus
The meeting of two personalities is
like the contact of two chemical substances:
if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
- Carl Jung
The easiest kind of friendship for me
is with ten thousand people.
The hardest is with one.
- Joan Baez
Our chief want is someone who will inspire us
to be what we know we could be.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The greatest compliment that was ever paid me
was when one asked me what I thought,
and attended to my answer.
- Henry David Thoreau
The greatest gift is a portion of thyself.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
A friend is one before whom I can think aloud.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Everyone has a "best friend" during each stage of life,
but only a precious few have the same one.
- Anonymous
We can never replace a friend.
When a man is fortunate enough to have several,
he finds they are all different.
No one has a double in friendship.
- Johann Schiller
A brother is a friend given by Nature.
- Jean Baptiste Legouve
Work Hard. Do your best. Keep your word.
Never get too big for your britches.
Trust in God. Have no fear;
and Never forget a friend.
- Harry S. Truman
Be slow in choosing a friend, slower in changing.
- Benjamin Franklin
A true friend sees the good in everything,
and brings out the best in the worst of things.
- Sasha Azevedo
The only way to have a friend is to be one.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
When one gets angry, it is always angry AT someone -
perhaps a friend or spouse, perhaps a stranger,
perhaps the nameless "they" - "those people at the bank wronged me,"
perhaps God, or perhaps oneself.
In any case, when one gets angry,
they want to find someone to be "responsible" for what happened.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A friend or co-worker shares a political,
religious, economic, or social opinion
that is opposite to yours -
does that drive a wedge between your hearts?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A true friend is one who believes in you
when you have ceased to believe in yourself.
- Anonymous
Walking with a friend in the dark is better
than walking alone in the light.
- Helen Keller
Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow.
Don't walk behind me; I may not lead.
Just walk beside me and be my friend.
- Albert Camus
He's my friend that speaks well of me behind my back.
- Thomas Fuller
The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand,
nor the kindly smile, nor the joy of companionship;
it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one
when he discovers that someone else believes in him
and is willing to trust him with his friendship.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
A friend is someone who understands my past,
believes in my future,
and accepts me just the way I am.
- Anonymous
A holiday, the day I first named you, "friend."
- Mary Anne Radmacher
A friend in need is a friend indeed.
- Latin Proverb
Health is the greatest possession.
Contentment is the greatest treasure.
Confidence is the greatest friend.
Non-being is the greatest joy.
- Lao Tzu
Your friend is the man who knows all about you,
and still likes you.
- Elbert Hubbard
A friend is a present you give yourself.
- Robert Louis Stevenson
Life without a friend is like death without a witness.
- Spanish proverb
The best mirror is an old friend.
- Proverb
Better to be a nettle in the side of your friend than his echo.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
So long as we are loved by others,
I would almost say that we are indispensable;
and no man is useless while he has a friend.
- Robert Louis Stevenson
Neither a borrower nor a lender be,
For loan oft loses both itself and friend,
And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry.
- William Shakespeare
A real friend is one who walks in
when the rest of the world walks out.
- Walter Winchell
A friend should be a master at guessing and keeping still.
- Friedrich Nietzsche
Love is the only force capable of
transforming an enemy into friend.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
When it hurts to look back,
and you're scared to look ahead,
you can look beside you
and your best friend will be there.
- Anonymous
Lord, grant comfort, joy and health
to those I call friend,
to those I call enemy,
and to those I have cursed by my indifference.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
When you part from your friend, you grieve not;
For that which you love most in him may be
clearer in his absence,
as the mountain to the climber
is clearer from the plain.
- Khalil Gibran
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.