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Let these funny Doris Wild Helmering Quotes lighten up your life. And check out the humorous quotes of many more funny authors in my large collection.
A friend encourages your dreams and offers advice -
but when you don't follow it,
they still respect and love you.
- Doris Wild Helmering
The proper office of a friend is to side with you
when you are in the wrong.
Nearly anybody will side with you when you are in the right.
- Mark Twain
A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend -
and he's a priest.
- Erma Bombeck
The feeling of friendship is like that
of being comfortably filled with roast beef;
love, like being enlivened with champagne.
- Samuel Johnson
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A friend is someone who will bail you out of jail.
A best friend is the one sitting next
to you saying "boy was that fun."
- The Maugles
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
- Groucho Marx
A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
- Erma Bombeck
You want a friend in Washington? Get a dog.
- Harry S. Truman
The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet
and steady and loyal and enduring a nature
that it will last through a whole lifetime,
if not asked to lend money.
- Mark Twain
My wife ran off with my best friend, and I sure do miss him.
- Anonymous
I was the kid next door's imaginary friend.
- Emo Phillips
Barf: I'm a mog: half man, half dog. I'm my own best friend!
- the movie Spaceballs (1987)
A true friend stabs you in the front.
- Oscar Wilde
I'm a very loyal and unreliable friend.
- Bono
Do not use a hatchet to remove
a fly from your friend's forehead.
- Chinese Proverb
Except in cases of necessity, which are rare,
leave your friend to learn
unpleasant things from his enemies;
they are ready enough to tell them.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
A lifelong friend is someone
you haven't borrowed money from yet.
- Anonymous
A true friend is one who
overlooks your failures
and tolerates your success.
- Doug Larson
I never considered a difference of opinion
in politics, in religion, in philosophy,
as cause for withdrawing from a friend.
- Thomas Jefferson 
A loyal friend laughs at your jokes
when they're not so good,
and sympathizes with your problems
when they're not so bad.
- Arnold H. Glasgow
The enemy of my enemy is my friend.
- Arabic Proverb and Chinese Proverb
The walls we build around us to
keep sadness out also keeps out the joy.
- Jim Rohn
The most called-upon prerequisite of a friend is an accessible ear.
- Maya Angelou
The price of freedom for a nation is lives and money.
Often, the price of freedom for an individual
is challenging the closed minds of family and friend.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A friend is someone who knows all about you,
and loves you just the same.
- Elbert Hubbard
This day I will marry my friend,
the one I laugh with, live for, dream with, love.
- Anonymous
A true friend is someone who
thinks that you are a good egg
even though he knows that
you are slightly cracked.
- Bernard Meltzer
I never found a companion that was
so companionable as solitude.
- Henry David Thoreau
The greatest gift is a portion of thyself.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Our chief want is someone who will inspire us
to be what we know we could be.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The key is to keep company only with people who uplift you,
whose presence calls forth your best.
- Epictetus
Farewell My Friend
It was beautiful as long as it lasted
The journey of my life.
I have no regrets whatsoever
save the pain I'll leave behind.
Those dear hearts who love and care...
And the strings pulling at the heart and soul...
The strong arms that held me up
When my own strength let me down.
At every turning of my life
I came across good friends,
Friends who stood by me,
Even when the time raced me by.
Farewell, farewell my friends
I smile and bid you goodbye.
No, shed no tears for I need them not
All I need is your smile.
If you feel sad do think of me
for that's what I'll like
when you live in the hearts
of those you love, remember then
you never die.
- Gitanjali Ghei
The finest kind of friendship is between people
who expect a great deal of each other but never ask it.
- Anonymous
The greatest compliment that was ever paid me
was when one asked me what I thought,
and attended to my answer.
- Henry David Thoreau
The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that
they can grow separately without growing apart.
- Elisabeth Foley
The easiest kind of friendship for me
is with ten thousand people.
The hardest is with one.
- Joan Baez
The language of Friendship is not words, but meanings.
It is an intelligence above language.
- Henry David Thoreau
The happiest moments my heart knows are those in which
it is pouring forth its affections to a few esteemed characters.
- Thomas Jefferson
The meeting of two personalities is
like the contact of two chemical substances:
if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
- Carl Jung
Your friend is the man who knows all about you,
and still likes you.
- Elbert Hubbard
A single rose can be my garden...
a single friend, my world.
- Leo Buscaglia
Neither a borrower nor a lender be,
For loan oft loses both itself and friend,
And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry.
- William Shakespeare
An old friend will help you move.
A good friend will help you move a dead body.
- Jim Hayes
An insincere and evil friend is more
to be feared than a wild beast;
a wild beast may wound your body,
but an evil friend will wound your mind.
- The Buddha
Lord, grant comfort, joy and health
to those I call friend,
to those I call enemy,
and to those I have cursed by my indifference.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
He's my friend that speaks well of me behind my back.
- Thomas Fuller
The only way to have a friend is to be one.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Be slow in choosing a friend, slower in changing.
- Benjamin Franklin
The best friend is the man who in wishing me well
wishes it for my sake.
- Anonymous
My best friend is the one who brings out the best in me.
- Henry Ford
When it hurts to look back,
and you're scared to look ahead,
you can look beside you
and your best friend will be there.
- Anonymous
I value the friend who for me finds time on his calendar,
but I cherish the friend who for me
does not consult his calendar.
- Robert Brault
It takes a long time to grow an old friend.
- John Leonard
The best mirror is an old friend.
- Proverb
A friend is someone who won't stop
until he finds you and brings you home.
- Fraser Sr. in the movie Due South
A friend in need is a friend indeed.
- Latin Proverb
A best friend is like a four leaf clover,
hard to find and lucky to have.
- Anonymous
In my friend, I find a second self.
- Isabel Norton
There is danger that we lose sight of
what our friend is absolutely,
while considering what she is to us alone.
- Henry David Thoreau
If we would build on a sure foundation in friendship,
we must love our friend for their sakes
rather than for our own.
- Charlotte Bronte
A friend to all is a friend to none.
- Aristotle
The only reward of virtue is virtue;
the only way to have a friend is to be one.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Moreover if your brother shall trespass against you,
go and tell him his fault between you and him alone.
- Matthew 18:15
A true friend sees the good in everything,
and brings out the best in the worst of things.
- Sasha Azevedo
I choose you as my friend, and rejoice.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
We can never replace a friend.
When a man is fortunate enough to have several,
he finds they are all different.
No one has a double in friendship.
- Johann Schiller
Better to be a nettle in the side of your friend than his echo.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The most I can do for my friend is simply be his friend.
- Henry David Thoreau
In everyone's life, at some time,
our inner fire goes out.
It is then burst into flame
by an encounter with another human being.
We should all be thankful for those people
who rekindle the inner spirit.
- Albert Schweitzer
Work Hard. Do your best. Keep your word.
Never get too big for your britches.
Trust in God. Have no fear;
and Never forget a friend.
- Harry S. Truman
Be true to your work, your word, and your friend.
- Henry David Thoreau
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.