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Let these funny Equilibrium Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Unless we form the habit of going to the Bible
in bright moments as well as in trouble,
we cannot fully respond to its consolations
because we lack equilibrium between light and darkness.
- Helen Keller
Thank you, gentlemen. Someday I will repay you,
unless of course I can't find you, or if I forget.
- the movie Shrek 2
Unless they share our opinions,
we seldom find people sensible.
- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
There is no use whatsoever trying to help
people who do not help themselves.
You cannot push anyone up a ladder
unless he is willing to climb himself.
- Andrew Carnegie
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Believe nothing, no matter where you read it,
or who said it, no matter if I have said it,
unless it agrees with your own reason
and your own common sense.
- The Buddha
You cannot discover new oceans unless
you have the courage to lose site of the shore.
- Anonymous
A good-bye is never painful unless
you're never going to say hello again.
- Anonymous
No one can terrorize a whole nation,
unless we are all his accomplices.
- Edward R. Murrow
A bend in the road is not the end of the road
unless you fail to make the turn.
- Anonymous
Never look back unless you are planning to go that way.
- Henry David Thoreau
By nature, we are all creatures of habit.
We instinctively adopt familiar routines for most activities.
We eat about the same number of meals each day -
at more or less the same times.
We have a regular pattern of sleeping -
unless it is perturbed by illness or shift work.
Most everything we do is habitual.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I hate the giving of the hand
unless the whole man accompanies it.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
A house is not a home unless it
contains food and fire
for the mind as well as the body.
- Benjamin Franklin
You can't get unless you give.
And you have to give without wanting to get.
- Theodore H. White
I do not believe in a fate that
falls on men however they act;
but I do believe in a fate
that falls on them unless they act.
- The Buddha
People rarely succeed unless they
have fun in what they are doing.
- Dale Carnegie
Courage is doing what you're afraid to do.
There can be no courage unless you're scared.
- Eddie Rickenbacker
A man can't ride your back unless it's bent.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Unless we place our religion
and our treasure in the same thing,
religion will always be sacrificed.
- Epictetus
The WAY is Not The Way for You,
Unless You Come With an Open Mind,
Clean Hands, and a Loving Heart.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I am not only a pacifist but a militant pacifist.
I am willing to fight for peace.
Nothing will end war unless
the people themselves refuse to go to war.
- Albert Einstein
No one can make you jealous, angry, vengeful, or greedy -
unless you let him.
- Napoleon Hill
To be wronged is nothing unless you continue to remember it.
- Confucius
Unless both sides win,
no agreement can be permanent.
- Jimmy Carter
About leadership: No person can be a great leader
unless he takes genuine joy
in the successes of those under him.
- W. A. Nance
Quotations are dead unless a spur for inquiry.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The part can never be well unless the whole is well.
- Plato
Unless you try to do something
beyond what you have already mastered,
you will never grow.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
A true friend never gets in your way
unless you happen to be going down.
- Arnold H. Glasgow
Nothing happens unless first a dream.
- Carl Sandburg
It is no use walking anywhere to preach
unless our walking is our preaching.
- St. Francis of Assisi
We are not going to be able
to operate our Spaceship Earth
successfully nor for much longer
unless we see it as a whole spaceship
and our fate as common.
It has to be everybody or nobody.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
Often, we get stuck on a question
for which we can't find an acceptable answer.
That is a good time to consider asking a different question.
Every question is based on some assumptions -
usually invisible assumptions that we don't see, unless we go looking.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Change does not roll in on the wheels of inevitability,
but comes through continuous struggle.
And so we must straighten our backs and work for our freedom.
A man can't ride you unless your back is bent.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Ever had a bad hair day -
a day when everything seemed to be going wrong?
Perhaps today is a day to soothe your ruffled feathers,
take a deep breath, and reaffirm that
the weight of the world is really not on your shoulders,
unless you choose to assume that burden.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Never stop dreaming your inspired future.
Believing in your dreams is only the first step,
but unless you have a dream that you believe in,
you are leaving your future to random chance.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life repeats itself mindlessly -
unless you become mindful, it will go on repeating like a wheel.
That's why Buddhists call it the wheel of life and death,
the wheel of time.
It moves like a wheel: birth is followed by death,
death is followed by birth;
love is followed by hate, hate is followed by love;
success is followed by failure,
failure is followed by success. Just see!
If you can watch just for a few days,
you will see a pattern emerging, a wheel pattern.
One day, a fine morning, you are feeling so good and so happy,
and another day you are so dull,
so dead that you start thinking of committing suicide.
And just the other day you were so full of life,
so blissful that you were feeling thankful to God,
that you were in a mood of deep gratefulness,
and today there is great complaint
and you don't see the point why one should go on living...
And it goes on and on, but you don't see the pattern.
Once you see the pattern, you can get out of it.
- Osho
I want to thank my parents for everything I am today -
fat, miserable, and paranoid.
- Anonymous
If the only prayer you said in your whole life was,
Thank you, that would suffice.
- Meister Eckhart
I am a self-centered spoiled-rotten brat,
Thank you for nurturing me.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Thank God men cannot fly, and lay waste
the sky as well as the earth.
- Henry David Thoreau
Life is a nurturing mother,
when you just remember to say "thank you."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Know the power of saying, "Thank you."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Thank you for joining me on this journey we call Life,
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I thank Spirit for EVERYTHING
that has brought me to this moment,
and entrust my entire being
to the gentle nurture of Spirit.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
It is foolish and wrong to mourn the men who died.
Rather we should thank God that such men lived.
- George S. Patton
Thank you, God, for this good life
and forgive us if we do not love it enough.
- Garrison Keillor
"Good morning!" he said at last.
"We don't want any adventures here, thank you!
You might try over The Hill or across The Water."
- J. R. R. Tolkien
It is my choice to care deeply about others.
No kindness is too small to be important -
the smile to the bank teller,
the sincere "thank you" for all kindnesses received,
the reassuring hand on the shoulder of a loved one or friend.
There is compassion in selfless generosity,
but there is also compassion in heartfelt empathy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I take every opportunity to articulate to others
the ways that they have blessed and influenced me.
I hold sweet memories of making the opportunity
to thank teachers who have influenced me.
I encourage everyone to seize opportunities
to tell people who have made a gift of knowledge or influence.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
I thank you God for this most amazing day,
for the leaping greenly spirits of trees
and for the blue dream of sky
and for everything which is natural,
which is infinite, which is yes.
- e. e. cummings
I thank God for my handicaps, for through them,
I have found myself, my work and my God.
- Helen Keller
Every man in his lifetime needs to thank his faults.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner
You want a friend in Washington? Get a dog.
- Harry S. Truman
I don't want to move to a city where the only cultural advantage
is being able to make a right turn on a red light.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall
Whenever I date a guy, I think,
"Is this the man I want my children
to spend their weekends with?"
- Rita Rudner
Marriage is a wonderful institution,
but who would want to live in an institution?
- H. L. Mencken
My boyfriend and I broke up.
He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.
- Rita Rudner
Women want mediocre men,
and men are working to be as mediocre as possible.
- Margaret Mead
You'll live to be a hundred if you give up
all the things that make you want to.
- the movie Interiors
You want to do mankind a real service?
Tell funnier jokes.
- the Woody Allen movie Stardust Memories (1980)
Men always want to be a woman's first love -
women like to be a man's last romance.
- Oscar Wilde
Here's a toast to your new bride who has everything a girl
could want in her life, except for good taste in men.
- Anonymous
Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy,
the first question I ask myself is:
is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?
- Rita Rudner
I feel the need to express something,
but I don't know what it is I want to express.
- the movie Interiors
Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want.
- Dan Stanford
If you want total security, go to prison.
There you're fed, clothed, given medical care and so on.
The only thing lacking... is freedom.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
How do you want to be remembered?
Live life full out - Begin today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Law of Contrariness:
Our chief want in life is somebody
who shall make us do what we can.
Having found them, we shall then hate them for it.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
I want a girl just like good old mom,
who is different in every way.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.