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If it turns out that there IS a God,
I don't think that he's evil.
I think that the worst you can say about him
is that basically he's an underachiever.
- the movie Love and Death
The key is, to not think of death as an end,
but as more of a very effective way to cut down on your expenses.
- the movie Love and Death
Oh, if only God would give me some sign.
If He would just speak to me once. Anything.
One sentence. Two words. If He would just cough.
- the movie Love and Death
I have no fear of the gallows ... They're going to shoot me.
- the movie Love and Death
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I got a perfect build for clothes.
I'm a twenty-eight dwarf.
- the movie Love and Death
Oh no, I can't do anything to the death.
Doctor's orders. You see, I have this ulcer condition,
and death is the worst thing for it.
- the movie Love and Death
And you, Sonja, you look more beautiful
standing here than you do in person.
- the movie Love and Death (1975)
To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering one must not love.
But then one suffers from not loving.
Therefore, to love is to suffer; not to love is to suffer;
to suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love.
To be happy, then, is to suffer, but suffering makes one unhappy.
Therefore, to be unhappy, one must love
or love to suffer or suffer from too much happiness.
I hope you're getting this down.
- the movie Love and Death
You can safely assume that you've
created God in your own image
when it turns out that God hates
all the same people you do.
- Anne Lamott
Harvard takes perfectly good plums as students,
and turns them into prunes.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
One of the annoying things about believing in free will
and individual responsibility is the difficulty
of finding somebody to blame your problems on.
And when you do find somebody, it's remarkable
how often his picture turns up on your driver's license.
- P. J. O'Rourke
Wherever a man turns he can find someone who needs him.
- Albert Schweitzer
The world turns aside to let any man pass
who knows where he is going.
- Epictetus
A man who as a physical being
is always turned toward the outside,
thinking that his happiness lies outside him,
finally turns inward and
discovers that the source is within him.
- Soren Kierkegaard
The success of love is in the loving -
it is not in the result of loving.
Of course it is natural in love
to want the best for the other person,
but whether it turns out that way or not
does not determine the value of what we have done.
- Mother Teresa
At the beginning of a relationship
we are attracted to the other person because
we think they are sexy, smart, funny -
whatever it is that we find appealing.
But very quickly, the focus of the relationship
turns to whether we feel appreciated.
If we don't feel appreciated, we don't feel loved.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life.
It turns what we have into enough, and more.
It turns denial into acceptance,
chaos to order, confusion to clarity.
It can turn a meal into a feast,
a house into a home, a stranger into a friend.
Gratitude makes sense of our past,
brings peace for today,
and creates a vision for tomorrow.
- Melody Beattie
I'm at an age when my back goes out more than I do.
- Phyllis Diller
Life is like jumping out of an airplane without a parachute -
only the last couple seconds are fatal,
but most people are scared to death the whole way down.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes
in the hope of pulling out an eel.
- Leonardo da Vinci
I was thrown out of N.Y.U. my freshman year
for cheating on my metaphysics final ...
I looked within the soul of the boy sitting next to me.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall
I'm going to go in the bathroom and scream.
I'll be out in a minute.
- the Woody Allen movie What's New Pussycat
Sucking the marrow out of life
doesn't mean choking on the bone.
- Robin Williams as John Keating
in the 1989 movie Dead Poets Society
EVERYONE has the right to make an ass out of themselves.
- Harold and Maude (The movie )
New Yorkers love it when you spill your guts out there.
Spill your guts at Wimbledon and they make you stop and clean it up.
- Jimmy Carter
One great thing about getting old is that
you can get out of all sorts of social obligations
just by saying you're too tired.
- George Carlin
Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter
quite like unrequited love.
- Charlie Brown in Charles M. Schulz' Peanuts comic
A friend is someone who will bail you out of jail.
A best friend is the one sitting next
to you saying "boy was that fun."
- The Maugles
Clear? Huh. Why a four-year-old child
could understand this report.
Run out and find me a four-year-old child,
I can't make head or tail of it.
- the Groucho Marx movie Duck Soup
One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends
is that three out of four murders
are committed by people who know the victim.
- George Carlin
I read that you should never go out with someone
if you can think of three reasons why you shouldn't.
- the movie Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason (2004)
Life is like a sewer...
what you get out of it depends on what you put into it.
- Tom Lehrer
A common denominator of all religions is that
they have the power to bring out the best and the worst in people.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
This is serious, get out your magic wand.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is serious, get out your magic wand.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Do not take life too seriously.
You will never get out of it alive.
- Elbert Hubbard
The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.
- George Carlin
The will to believe chases out the rational mind,
whenever and wherever the two come into conflict.
- Philip K. Dick
Watch out, I have a Magic Wand.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I have taken more out of alcohol
than alcohol has taken out of me.
- Winston Churchill
I'm all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons
out of the hands of fools.
Let's start with typewriters.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
I always seem to get inspiration and renewed vitality
by contact with this great novel land of yours
which sticks up out of the Atlantic.
- Winston Churchill
I do not believe that civilization will be wiped out
in a war fought with the atomic bomb.
Perhaps two-thirds of the people of the earth will be killed.
- Albert Einstein
Any idiot can face a crisis.
It's the day-to-day living that wears you out.
- Anton Chekhov
Never let the fear of striking out get in your way.
- Babe Ruth
I don't think the intelligence reports are all that hot.
Some days I get more out of the New York Times.
- John F. Kennedy
A New Year's resolution is something that
goes in one Year and out the other.
- Anonymous
It's better to burn out, than to fade away.
- Neil Young
How do you want to be remembered?
Live life full out - Begin today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If you are out to describe the truth,
leave elegance to the tailor.
- Albert Einstein
I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out
where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
- George Carlin
Money won't make you happy...
but everybody wants to find out for themselves.
- Zig Ziglar
A good indignation brings out all one's powers.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The third certainty of life, after death and taxes,
is that nothing will work out the way you want.
Life is fully as bad as you think it is.
Choose to live joyfully anyway.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Darkness cannot drive out darkness;
only light can do that.
Hate cannot drive out hate;
only love can do that.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Fully experience THIS moment -
breathe in, breathe out - nothing more.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The beauty does not live out there;
the beauty's in my eyes.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Move out of your comfort zone. You can only
grow if you are willing to feel awkward and
uncomfortable when you try something new.
- Brian Tracy
Soon we'll be out amid the cold world's strife.
Soon we'll be sliding down the razor blade of life.
But as we go our sordid sep'rate ways,
We shall ne'er forget thee, thou golden college days.
Hearts full of youth,
Hearts full of truth,
Six parts gin to one part vermouth.
- Tom Lehrer - song: Bright College Days,
album: An Evening Wasted With Tom Lehrer
Capitalism tries for a delicate balance:
It attempts to work things out so that
everyone gets just enough stuff to keep them from
getting violent and trying to take other people's stuff.
- George Carlin
In boundless love as a Christian and as a man
I read through the passage which tells us
how the Lord at last rose in His might
and seized the scourge to drive out of the Temple
the brood of vipers and of adders.
- Adolf Hitler
Today is your day to dance lightly with life,
sing wild songs of adventure,
invite rainbows and butterflies out to play,
soar your spirit, and unfurl your joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The world is perfect. It's a mess.
It has always been a mess.
We are not going to change it.
Our job is to straighten out our own lives.
- Joseph Campbell
The walls we build around us to
keep sadness out also keeps out the joy.
- Jim Rohn
Play full-out and enjoy all of Life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Falling out of love is very enlightening.
For a short while you see the world with new eyes.
- Iris Murdoch
Remain calm, serene, always in command of yourself.
You will then find out how easy it is to get along.
- Paramahansa Yogananda
Life is a dangerous - ultimately fatal - endeavor,
so you may as well live it full out.
Chart your course, cast off the lines,
and boldly sail the seas of life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I have found out that though the ways in which
I can make myself useful are few,
yet the work open to me is endless.
- Helen Keller
Be curious; be adventurous; live life full-out.
Accept the challenge, and reach for the brass ring.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
To fall in love is awfully simple,
but to fall out of love is simply awful.
- Bess Myerson
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.