Enter one or two keywords to search these Funny Quotes.

Hint: keep it simple, like life twain



Facebook share   Tweet This   Email this

Funny Quotes about Life
Funny Quotes about Life | Funny Love Quotes | Links | About
Search:   A-   B-   Ca-   Co-   D-   E-   F-   G-   H-    I-    J-K-L   M-   N-O   Pa-   Pr-   Q-R   Sa-   Sk-   T-   U-V-W-X-Y-Z


Get a Humorous, Yet Insightful, Quote of the Day each day by email.
Follow funny-quotes-life.com by Email:


We all should choose our friends carefully.
by Jewel

We all should choose our friends carefully.
I used to think that no one could know me better than somebody else,
because you're inside yourself, your body, you can't see yourself.
If you think like that, you surround yourself with
other people who are willing to tell you who you are,
which are usually judgmental people ...
we should really surround ourselves with the ones
that adore us and believe in the highest of us.
- Jewel

People living their lives for you on TV;
They say they're better than you, and you agree.
- Jewel

Suffering is everywhere. Don't ever think it isn't.
So are miracles. Don't ever think they aren't.
- Jewel

Love bravely, live bravely, be courageous,
there's really nothing to lose.
- Jewel


Get a Funny Quote of the Day each day by email or in your feed reader.

 Subscribe in a reader -- or
Enter your email address:




Delivered by FeedBurner


In case you failed to notice,
in case you failed to see,
this is my heart,
bleeding before you,
this is me down on my knees.
- Jewel

I'd rather see the world from another angle
- Jewel

I'm half alive but I feel mostly dead.
- Jewel


 

Maybe I could have loved you better.
Maybe you should have loved me more.
Maybe our hearts were just next in line.
Maybe everything breaks sometime.
- Jewel

I was thinking that I might fly today.
Just to disprove all the things you say...
please be careful with me, I'm sensitive,
and I'd like to stay that way.
- Jewel

Your life becomes what you believe.
- Jewel

I'm having a bad day. I am not size six.
My legs are not skinny as sticks,
and dammit, someone's got to pay.
I'm afraid that I can't satisfy myself
and that my happiness depends on someone else.
I feel weak, so you're gonna take the fall.
You're so shallow.
- Jewel

The things you fear are undefeatable,
not by their nature, but by your approach.
- Jewel

In silence you hear who you are becoming.
You create yourself.
- Jewel

My whole goal is to keep my spirit intact.
If that doesn't happen, none of this is worth it.
- Jewel

Being part of the natural world reminds me
that innocence isn't ever lost completely;
we just need to maintain our goodness to regain it.
- Jewel

I adore the human experience
- Jewel

I have this theory - that if we're told we're bad,
then that's the only ideal we'll ever have.
- Jewel

I will gather myself around my faith,
for light does the darkness most fear.
- Jewel

Through Love and through Beauty, we achieve immortality.
- Jewel (paraphrasing Plato)

Forgiveness is the needle that knows how to mend.
- Jewel

What we call human nature in actuality is human habit.
- Jewel

Who will save your soul if you won't save you own?
- Jewel

Ride With the Devil.
- Jewel

Another day, another dollar, another war, another tower
Went up where the homeless had their home.
- Jewel

Show me a man who knows his own heart
and to him I shall belong.
- Jewel

Reality is what you believe it to be.
It's what you put your thought and energy into,
because your hands physically manifest thought.
So your world becomes what you feel and what you think.
- Jewel

Love bravely, live bravely, be courageous;
there's really nothing to lose.
There's no wrong you can't make right again,
so be kinder to yourself;
have fun, take chances. There are no bounds.
- Jewel

Lend your voices only to sounds of freedom,
no longer lend your strength to that
which you wish to be free from.
Fill your life with love and bravery,
and you shall live a life uncommon.
- Jewel

I get bored very easily, ...
I have a voracious appetite and I do not feel alive
if I'm repeating something I'm good at.
So I'm always looking for new challenges.
- Jewel

I'm becoming more and more myself with time.
I guess that's what grace is.
The refinement of your soul through time.
- Jewel

Innocence isn't ever lost completely;
we just need to maintain our goodness to regain it.
- Jewel

I love the contradictions of people
- Jewel

If I could tell the world just one thing
it would be we're all okay,
and not to worry cause worry is wasteful
and useless in times like these.
I won't be made useless.
I won't be idle with despair,
I will gather myself around my faith.
Light does the darkness most fear.
- Jewel

You have to realize: OK, I don't know how
to solve a political problem,
I don't know how to solve the pollution problem...
all I know is in my own life,
I need to figure out some sense of purpose,
I need to figure out how to be happy...
and I'm willing.
- Jewel

You always feel better when you sing.
Music touches people's hearts.
You know, it doesn't go through your mental capacity,
it just moves you and it will let you cry.
It's worth it doing a show
and when you touch a crowd
and move yourself at the same
- Jewel

Gather yourself by the sea shore and I will love you there.
Assemble yourself with wild things,
with songs of the sparrow and sea-foam.
Let mad beauty collect itself in your eyes
and it will shine - Calling me.
For I long for a man with nests of wild things in his hair.
A man who will Kiss the Flame.
- Jewel

There are people selling thoughtlessness with such casualty.
- Jewel

I've always had a love for poetry,
and when I got signed to a record label I thought,
"How odd that I'm doing a record before a book of poetry."
- Jewel

However beautiful the strategy,
you should occasionally look at the results.
- Winston Churchill

Religion is the masterpiece of the art of animal training,
for it trains people as to how they should think.
- Arthur Schopenhauer

Everyone should have at least two friends -
one to talk to and one to talk about.
- Anonymous

A honeymoon should be like a table:
four bare legs and no drawers.
- Anonymous

Husbands should be like Kleenex:
soft, strong, and disposable.
- the movie Clue (1985)

Procrastination is the bad habit of putting off
until the day after tomorrow what should
have been done the day before yesterday.
- Napoleon Hill

I was married by a judge.
I should have asked for a jury.
- Groucho Marx

I read that you should never go out with someone
if you can think of three reasons why you shouldn't.
- the movie Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason (2004)

The person who says it cannot be done
should not interrupt the person who is doing it.
- Chinese proverb

All discarded lovers should be given a second chance,
but with somebody else.
- Mae West

People who say it cannot be done should not
interrupt those who are doing it.
- George Bernard Shaw

It is an open question whether any behavior
based on fear of eternal punishment
can be regarded as ethical
or should be regarded as merely cowardly.
- Margaret Mead

One should always be in love.
That is the reason one should never marry.
- Oscar Wilde

One should never know too precisely
whom one has married
- Friedrich Nietzsche

If I knew for a certainty that a man was coming to my house
with the conscious design of doing me good,
I should run for my life.
- Henry David Thoreau

One should never trust a woman who tells her real age.
If she tells that, she'll tell anything.
- Oscar Wilde

The physician can bury his mistakes,
but the architect can only advise his client to plant vines -
so they should go as far as possible from home
to build their first buildings.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

Bad taste is simply saying the truth before it should be said.
- Mel Brooks

I will far rather see the race of man extinct
than that we should become less than beasts
by making the noblest of God's creation,
woman, the object of our lust.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

The universe we observe has precisely
the properties we should expect
if there is, at bottom, no design,
no purpose, no evil, no good,
nothing but blind, pitiless indifference.
- Charles Darwin

A benevolent man should allow a few faults in himself,
to keep his friends in countenance.
- Benjamin Franklin

Two things a man should never be angry at:
what he can help,
and what he cannot help.
- Thomas Fuller

Laugh when you can,
apologize when you should,
and let go of what you can't change.
Life's too short to be anything... but happy.
- Anonymous

The Ought-To Need-To Tango:
I am racked with the guilt and the pain of I should,
and I ought, and I can't, but I must.
I can't rest; I can't sleep; I'm just not understood,
and I hate that the world is unjust.
I have work; I have woes; I have troubles for life;
but I don't have a ME that I trust.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The truth. It is a beautiful and terrible thing,
and should be treated with caution.
- J. K. Rowling

If a man is called to be a street sweeper,
he should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted,
or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry.
He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts
of heaven and earth will pause to say,
here lived a great street sweeper who did his job well.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Old age has deformities enough of its own.
It should never add to them the deformity of vice.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

You either do it completely and utterly,
or you should stop doing it.
- Bono (paraphrase)

Those who have come here to hate should leave now;
for in their hate, they only betray themselves.
- Terry Goodkind

If a man is proud of his wealth,
he should not be praised until it is known how he employs it.
- Socrates

Everyone should carefully observe
which way his heart draws him,
and then choose that way with all his strength.
- Hasidic Proverb

The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy
is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet,
alone with the heavens, nature and God.
Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be.
- Anne Frank

Man should forget his anger before he lies down to sleep.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi


Thank you for visiting: We all should choose our friends carefully. by Jewel.

Please sign up on the form below to receive
my Free Daily Inspiration - Daily Quotes email.

You can also search my large collection of Funny Quotes.

May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


Funny Quotes

 


All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.