Enter one or two keywords to search these Funny Quotes.

Hint: keep it simple, like life twain



Facebook share   Tweet This   Email this

Funny Quotes about Life
Funny Quotes about Life | Funny Love Quotes | Links | About
Search:   A-   B-   Ca-   Co-   D-   E-   F-   G-   H-    I-    J-K-L   M-   N-O   Pa-   Pr-   Q-R   Sa-   Sk-   T-   U-V-W-X-Y-Z


Get a Humorous, Yet Insightful, Quote of the Day each day by email.
Follow funny-quotes-life.com by Email:


Funny Used Quotes
Funny Quotes about Used

Let these funny Used Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

I'm not used to feeling so human.
Is it always like this?
- Edward, from Twilight Saga by Stephenie Meyer

The future ain't what it used to be.
- Yogi Berra

In those days he was wiser than he is now;
he used to frequently take my advice.
- Winston Churchill

The claim "I was only following orders" has been used
to justify too many tragedies in our history.
- Captain Picard of the television series
STAR TREK: The Next Generation


Get a Funny Quote of the Day each day by email or in your feed reader.

 Subscribe in a reader -- or
Enter your email address:




Delivered by FeedBurner


Getting married is a lot like getting into a tub of hot water.
After you get used to it, it ain't so hot.
- Minnie Pearl

It's just random chance, baby; get used to it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I used to go away for weeks in a state of confusion.
- Albert Einstein


 

I used to believe in forever, but forever's too good to be true.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

Be a yardstick of quality.
Some people aren't used to an environment
where excellence is expected.
- Steve Jobs

We cannot solve our problems with the same
thinking we used when we created them.
- Albert Einstein

Life should not be a journey to the grave
with the intention of arriving safely
in a pretty and well preserved body,
but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke,
thoroughly used up, totally worn out,
and loudly proclaiming, "Wow! What a Ride!"
- Hunter S. Thompson

My father always used to say that when you die,
if you've got five real friends, then you've had a great life.
- Lee Iacocca

Friendship, like credit, is highest when it is not used.
- Elbert Hubbard

I used to tell my husband that,
if he could make me "understand" something,
it would be clear to all the other people in the country.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

A great secret of success is to go through life
as a man who never gets used up.
- Albert Schweitzer

"Think simple" as my old master used to say -
meaning reduce the whole of its parts
into the simplest terms,
getting back to first principles.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

Win as if you were used to it,
lose as if you enjoyed it for a change.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

To love. To be loved.
To never forget your own insignificance.
To never get used to the unspeakable violence
and the vulgar disparity of life around you.
To seek joy in the saddest places.
To pursue beauty to its lair.
To never simplify what is complicated
or complicate what is simple.
To respect strength, never power.
Above all, to watch. To try to understand.
To never look away. And never, never, to forget.
- Arundhati Roy

I offer my body, my mind
and any ability that I posses,
to be used by Thee, O Infinite Creator,
in whatever way Thou dost choose
to express Thyself through me.
I know that all work is Thy work,
and that no task is too difficult
or too menial when offered
to Thee in loving service.
- Paramahansa Yogananda

In this outward and physical ceremony,
we attest once again to the inner
and spiritual strength of our Nation.
As my high school teacher, Miss Julia Coleman, used to say:
"We must adjust to changing times,
and still hold to unchanging principles."
- Jimmy Carter

Most people consider the course of events as natural and inevitable.
They little know what radical change are possible through prayer.
Every morning I offer my body, my mind and any ability that I posses,
to be used by Thee, O infinite creator,
in whatever way Thou dost choose to express Thyself through me.
I know that all work is Thy work, and that no task is too difficult
or too menial when offered to Thee in loving service.
- Paramahansa Yogananda

We all should choose our friends carefully.
I used to think that no one could know me better than somebody else,
because you're inside yourself, your body, you can't see yourself.
If you think like that, you surround yourself with
other people who are willing to tell you who you are,
which are usually judgmental people ...
we should really surround ourselves with the ones
that adore us and believe in the highest of us.
- Jewel

Is a belief a perception of the five senses,
or is it a perception of emotional feeling?
Is it better to say "I sense" and/or "I feel"?
Is it better to say " I know" than "I believe"?
Is belief based on experience or on a idea?
My thinking is that belief/believing is a very missed used word.
- Anonymous

The body is an instrument which
only gives off music when it is used as a body.
Always an orchestra, and just as music traverses walls,
so sensuality traverses the body and reaches up to ecstasy.
- Anais Nin

The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde

Yesterday is like a dung heap;
you can complain about the smell,
or you can use it to fertilize tomorrow's garden.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz

I always pass on good advice.
It is the only thing to do with it.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde

There is no use whatsoever trying to help
people who do not help themselves.
You cannot push anyone up a ladder
unless he is willing to climb himself.
- Andrew Carnegie

"When I use a word," Humpty Dumpty said in rather a scornful tone,
"it means just what I choose it to mean - neither more nor less."
- Lewis Carroll

In life you are given two ends;
one to think with and the other to sit on.
Your success in life depends on which end you use most.
Heads you win, tails you lose.
- Conrad Burns

What would be the use of immortality to a person
who cannot use well a half an hour.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

The civilized man has built a coach,
but has lost the use of his feet.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Do not use a hatchet to remove
a fly from your friend's forehead.
- Chinese Proverb

If at first you don't succeed,
try, try, and try again.
Then give up.
There's no use being a damned fool about it.
- W. C. Fields

Use the power of your word
in the direction of truth and love.
- don Miguel Ruiz

"Worry" is a word that I don't allow myself to use.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn't use long, difficult words
but rather short, easy words like "What about lunch?"
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

Fear has its use but cowardice has none.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

There is a power for good in the universe
greater than you are and you can use it.
- Ernest Holmes

Don't fight forces, use them.
- R. Buckminster Fuller

Use what talents you possess.
The woods would be very silent
if no birds sang there,
except those that sang best.
- Henry Van Dyke

We must use time wisely and forever realize
that the time is always ripe to do right.
- Nelson Mandela

We must use time as a tool, not as a crutch.
- John F. Kennedy

Understand that the right to
choose your own path
is a sacred privilege.
Use it.
Dwell in possibility.
- Oprah Winfrey

It is no use walking anywhere to preach
unless our walking is our preaching.
- St. Francis of Assisi

Capital as such is not evil; it is its wrong use that is evil.
Capital in some form or other will always be needed.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Use what language you will,
you can never say anything but what you are.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Hide not your talents,
they for use were made.
What's a sundial in the shade?
- Benjamin Franklin

If the problem can be solved,
there is no use worrying about it.
If it can't be solved,
worrying will do no good.
- Tibetan proverb

I hope our wisdom will grow with our power, and teach us,
that the less we use our power the greater it will be.
- Thomas Jefferson

It is no use saying, "We are doing our best."
You have got to succeed in doing what is necessary.
- Winston Churchill

INTENT:
We hold the power to make things happen
through our intent -
to the extent that we use our intention
with compassion and without ego.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It is not enough to have a good mind,
the main thing is to use it well.
- Rene Descartes

The means we use must be as pure
as the ends we seek.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

What's the use of a fine house if you haven't got
a tolerable planet to put it on?
- Henry David Thoreau

All the energy of the universe is mine
to use as spirit directs.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Make the best use of what is in your power,
and take the rest as it happens.
- Epictetus

Education is the most powerful weapon
which you can use to change the world.
- Nelson Mandela

The less I take the difficulties of my life as personal affront,
and the more I use them as an opportunity to learn and grow...
the easier I sleep at night.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

I am an optimist.
It does not seem too much use being anything else.
- Winston Churchill

In all my ways of seeing - may I use new glasses,
a telescope and a microscope.
And may I always allow myself to see a circumstance
through the tender hearts of my friends.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Is the system going to flatten you out
and deny you your humanity,
or are you going to be able to make use of the system
to the attainment of human purposes?
- Joseph Campbell

The Science of Mind is intensely practical
because it teaches us how to use
the Mind Principle for definite purposes,
such as helping those who are sick, impoverished, or unhappy.
- Ernest Holmes

Before we acquire great power
we must acquire wisdom to use it well.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

If I mayn't tell you what I feel,
what is the use of a friend?
- William Makepeace Thackeray

We must use time creatively.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

I deplore the need or the use of troops anywhere
to get American citizens to obey
the orders of constituted courts.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

Men have a respect for scholarship and learning
greatly out of proportion to the use they commonly serve.
- Henry David Thoreau

Politics are very much like war.
We may even have to use poison gas at times.
- Winston Churchill

The road to freedom lies not through
mysteries or occult performances,
but through the intelligent use
of natural forces and laws.
- Ernest Holmes


Thank you for visiting: Funny Used Quotes - Funny Quotes about Used.

Please sign up on the form below to receive
my Free Daily Inspiration - Daily Quotes email.

You can also search my large collection of Funny Quotes.

May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


Funny Quotes

 


All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.