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Funny Better Quotes
Funny Quotes about Better

Let these funny Better Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

It is far better to be alone,
than to be in bad company.
- George Washington

I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln

For my part, I consider that it will be found much better
by all parties to leave the past to history,
especially as I propose to write that history myself.
- Winston Churchill

The time-traveling is just too dangerous.
Better that I devote myself to study
the other great mystery of the universe - women!
- the movie Back to the Future II


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As a cure for worrying,
work is better than whiskey.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

I always avoid prophesying beforehand,
because it is a much better policy to prophesy
after the event has already taken place.
- Winston Churchill

Which form of proverb do you prefer
Better late than never, or Better never than late?
- Lewis Carroll


 

The man who reads nothing at all
is better educated than the man who reads nothing but newspapers.
- Thomas Jefferson

The only advantage of not being too good a housekeeper
is that your guests are so pleased
to feel how very much better they are.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Money can't buy friends
but it can get you a better class of enemy.
- Spike Milligan

It's better to burn out, than to fade away.
- Neil Young

I think men who have a pierced ear
are better prepared for marriage.
They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
- Rita Rudner

It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool,
than to speak and remove all doubt.
- sometimes attributed to Mark Twain, Abraham Lincoln, or Samuel Johnson

I love to shop after a bad relationship.
I don't know. I buy a new outfit
and it makes me feel better. It just does.
Sometimes I see a really great outfit,
I'll break up with someone on purpose.
- Rita Rudner

Today is probably a good day for something;
but it's a better day for doing nothing.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Money is better than poverty,
if only for financial reasons.
- Woody Allen

People living their lives for you on TV;
They say they're better than you, and you agree.
- Jewel

Really I feel less keen about the Army every day.
I think the Church would suit me better.
- Winston Churchill

Our faith gives us knowledge of something better.
- E. F. Schumacher

Anger? perhaps there is a better way.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I believe that everything happens for a reason.
People change so that you can learn to let go,
things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right,
you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself,
and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.
- Marilyn Monroe

It is better to light a candle than to curse the darkness.
- Chinese proverb often quoted by Eleanor Roosevelt

Sometimes, indeed, there is such a discrepancy
between the genius and his human qualities
that one has to ask oneself whether
a little less talent might not have been better.
- Carl Jung

I don't like that man.
I must get to know him better.
- Abraham Lincoln

To laugh often and much;
to win the respect of intelligent people
and the affection of children,
to leave the world a better place,
to know even one life has breathed easier
because you have lived,
this is to have succeeded.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

How could youths better learn to live
than by at once trying the experiment of living?
- Henry David Thoreau

Why, I'd like nothing better than to achieve
some bold adventure, worthy of our trip.
- Aristophanes

Discretion is the better part of valor.
(originally "The better part of valor is discretion")
- William Shakespeare

Maybe I could have loved you better.
Maybe you should have loved me more.
Maybe our hearts were just next in line.
Maybe everything breaks sometime.
- Jewel

The River of Life has no meaning,
no good, no bad, no better, no worse,
no love, no hate, no fear, no anger, no joy.
The River of Life has no judgment, no expectation.
The River of Life just IS.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.
- Alfred Lord Tennyson

A bad peace is better than a good war.
- Yiddish Proverb

Because we believe that our ethnic group,
our society, our political party, our God,
is better than your God, we kill each other.
- Neale Donald Walsch

Better learn balance. Balance is key.
Balance good, karate good. Everything good.
Balance bad, better pack up, go home. Understand?
- Miyagi: character in the movie Karate Kid

Better learn balance. Balance is key.
- Miyagi: character in the movie Karate Kid

At the end of a matter ask,
"What will I learn from this to make me better?"
- Mary Anne Radmacher

To leave the world a bit better ...
to know that one life has breathed easier because you have lived.
This is to have succeeded.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

The willow which bends to the tempest,
often escapes better than the oak which resists it;
and so in great calamities,
it sometimes happens that light and frivolous spirits
recover their elasticity and presence of mind sooner
than those of a loftier character.
- Albert Schweitzer

It is any day better to stand erect
with a broken and bandaged head
then to crawl on one's belly,
in order to be able to save one's head.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

It is better to learn late than never.
- Publilius Syrus

How many things there are concerning which we might
well deliberate whether we had better know them.
- Henry David Thoreau

Education is a better safeguard of liberty than a standing army.
- Edward Everett

Fear is the cheapest room in the house.
I would like to see you living
In better conditions.
- Hafiz

You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep
because reality is finally better than your dreams.
- Dr. Seuss

Kindness is better than piety.
- Yiddish Proverb

A truly good book teaches me better than to read it.
I must soon lay it down, and commence living on its hint.
What I began by reading, I must finish by acting.
- Henry David Thoreau

Better than a thousand hollow words,
is one word that brings peace.
- The Buddha

Almost always, the creative dedicated minority
has made the world better.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

In the long run, men hit only what they aim at.
Therefore, they had better aim at something high.
- Henry David Thoreau

To give pleasure to a single heart by a single act
is better than a thousand heads bowing in prayer.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Freedom is nothing but a chance to be better.
- Albert Camus

Never mind what others do;
do better than yourself,
beat your own record from day to day,
and you are a success.
- William J. H. Boetcker

Better late than never.
- Proverb

Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius
and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous
than absolutely boring.
- Marilyn Monroe

Build a better mousetrap
and the world will beat a path to your door.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Better keep yourself clean and bright;
you are the window through which
you must see the world.
- George Bernard Shaw

Well done is better than well said.
- Benjamin Franklin

Look deep into nature, and then
you will understand everything better.
- Albert Einstein

I believe that it is better to tell the truth than a lie.
I believe it is better to be free than to be a slave.
And I believe it is better to know than to be ignorant.
- H.L. Mencken

Be careful to leave your sons well instructed rather than rich,
for the hopes of the instructed
are better than the wealth of the ignorant.
- Epictetus

I soothe my conscience now with the thought that
it is better for hard words to be on paper
than that Mummy should carry them in her heart.
- Anne Frank

If we could first know where we are,
and whither we are tending,
we could then better judge what to do,
and how to do it.
- Abraham Lincoln

Just smiling goes a long way toward
making you feel better about life.
And when you feel better about life, your life is better.
- Art Linkletter

Better do a good deed near at home
than go far away to burn incense.
- Amelia Earhart

Genius is the power to labor better and more availably.
Deserve thy genius: exalt it.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Poverty with security is better than plenty
in the midst of fear and uncertainty.
- Aesop

It is better to be in chains with friends,
than to be in a garden with strangers.
- Persian Proverb

Prevention is better than cure.
- Desiderius Erasmus

That you may retain your self-respect, it is better
to displease the people by doing what you know is right,
than to temporarily please them by doing what you know is wrong.
- William J. H. Boetcker

To kill an error is as good a service as,
and sometimes even better than,
the establishing of a new truth or fact.
- Charles Darwin

The "stories" we choose to tell about our past
are never what a video camera would have recorded.
We can tell a sad story or a happy story,
and neither story is either
more accurate or "better" than the other story.
The difference is that one story causes us to suffer,
while the other brings us joy. I choose joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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