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Funny Believe Quotes
Funny Quotes about Believe

Let these funny Believe Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

The future belongs to those
who believe in the beauty of their dreams.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

I believe in equality for everyone,
except reporters and photographers.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

It is even harder for the average ape to believe that
he has descended from man.
- H. L. Mencken

I don't believe in the after life,
although I am bringing a change of underwear.
- Woody Allen


 

I believe totally in a Capitalist System,
I only wish that someone would try it.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

We are all worms. But I believe that I am a glow-worm.
- Winston Churchill

I do not believe that civilization will be wiped out
in a war fought with the atomic bomb.
Perhaps two-thirds of the people of the earth will be killed.
- Albert Einstein


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Sex education may be a good idea in the schools,
but I don't believe the kids should be given homework.
- Bill Cosby

The way I see it, it doesn't matter what you believe,
just so you're sincere.
- Linus Van Pelt in Charles M. Schulz' Go Fly A Kite, Charlie Brown

The will to believe chases out the rational mind,
whenever and wherever the two come into conflict.
- Philip K. Dick

I do not believe in using women in combat,
because females are too fierce.
- Margaret Mead

Man is a credulous animal, and must believe something;
in the absence of good grounds for belief,
he will be satisfied with bad ones.
- Bertrand Russell

Contrary to general belief,
I do not believe that friends are necessarily
the people you like best,
they are merely the people who got there first.
- Peter Ustinov

Anyone who can worship a trinity
and insist that his religion is a monotheism
can believe anything.
- Robert A Heinlein

I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful,
natural, wholesome things that money can buy.
- Steve Martin

I truly believe that happiness is possible...
even when you're thirty-three
and have a bottom the size of two bowling balls.
- the movie Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason

An idea isn't responsible for the people who believe in it.
- Don Marquis

Trust your own inner guidance.
Have faith that your steps are
carrying you toward your dreams.
Keep your eyes on the heavens
and believe that your feet will carry you well.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Far away there in the sunshine are my highest aspirations.
I may not reach them, but I can look up and see their beauty,
believe in them, and try to follow where they lead.
- Louisa May Alcott

Believe nothing, no matter where you read it,
or who said it, no matter if I have said it,
unless it agrees with your own reason
and your own common sense.
- The Buddha

People are stupid;
given proper motivation, almost anyone will believe almost anything.
Because people are stupid, they will believe a lie
because they want to believe it's true,
or because they are afraid it might be true.
- Terry Goodkind

Those who believe they can do something
and those who believe they can't
are both right.
- Henry Ford

I believe that everything happens for a reason.
People change so that you can learn to let go,
things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right,
you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself,
and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.
- Marilyn Monroe

I contend that we are both atheists.
I just believe in one fewer god than you do.
When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods,
you will understand why I dismiss yours.
- Stephen Roberts

I don't believe people are looking for the meaning of life
as much as they are looking for the experience of being alive.
- Joseph Campbell

A wise girl kisses but doesn't love,
listens but doesn't believe,
and leaves before she is left.
- Marilyn Monroe

We believe whatever we want to believe.
- Demosthenes

I believe that a simple and unassuming manner of life
is best for everyone, best both for the body and the mind.
- Albert Einstein

Whatever you do, you need courage.
Whatever course you decide upon,
there is always someone to tell you
that you are wrong.
There are always difficulties arising
that tempt you to believe your critics are right.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Never believe that a few caring people can't change the world.
For, indeed, that's all who ever have.
- Margaret Mead

Everything we believe is a matter of evolution and history.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The moment we want to believe something,
we suddenly see all the arguments for it,
and become blind to the arguments against it.
- George Bernard Shaw

Because we believe that our ethnic group,
our society, our political party, our God,
is better than your God, we kill each other.
- Neale Donald Walsch

Man prefers to believe what he prefers to be true.
- Francis Bacon

Have a Vision, a Dream.
Believe in that Vision.
Live that Vision with every fiber of your being.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I used to believe in forever, but forever's too good to be true.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

Nothing splendid has ever been achieved except by those who dared
believe that something inside of them was superior to circumstance.
- Bruce Barton

The thing always happens that you really believe in;
and the belief in a thing makes it happen.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

I believe life's rich experiences need to be shared with others -
for me this is the way one builds knowledge.
- Pravs J

Even the truth, when believed, is a lie.
You must experience the truth, not believe it.
- Werner Erhard

Shallow men believe in luck.
Strong men believe in cause and effect.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

It's difficult to believe that people are still starving
in this country because food isn't available.
- Ronald Reagan

Identify your assumptions (what you believe).
Question how you feel when you hold those assumptions.
Visualize holding different assumptions.
Ask yourself how it feels to hold a different world-view.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Believe that none of the effort you put
into coming closer to God is ever wasted -
even if in the end you don't achieve
what you are striving for.
- Rebbe Nachman of Breslov

We believe that if men have the talent
to invent new machines that put men out of work,
they have the talent to put those men back to work.
- John F. Kennedy

I don't believe in dieting.
- Joan Collins

Life is better than death, I believe,
if only because it is less boring, and because it has fresh peaches in it.
- Alice Walker

And I believe that the best buy in public health today
must be a combination of regular physical exercise and a healthy diet.
- Julie Bishop

When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President;
I'm beginning to believe it.
- Clarence Darrow

The only way to store information is by agreement.
The belief system is like a Book of Law that rules our mind.
Our biggest fear is taking the risk to be alive.
Humans punish themselves endlessly
for not being what they believe they should be.
We have the need to be accepted and to be loved by others,
but we cannot accept and love ourselves.
- don Miguel Ruiz

In the sky, there is no distinction of east and west;
people create distinctions out of their own minds
and then believe them to be true.
- The Buddha

Take time to contemplate -
away from the opinions and influence of others -
what you really want
and what you believe to be important in your life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Like charity, I believe glamour should begin at home.
- Loretta Young

I can not believe that war
is the best solution.
No one won the last war,
and no one will win the next war.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

I used to be hung up on my figure, but it's a waste of time.
I don't believe in diets.
Have four pints one night, be healthy the next.
- Sophie Ellis Bextor

I believe it is important for people to create a healthy
mental environment in which to accomplish daily tasks.
- Darren L. Johnson

I do not believe that God has
imposed suffering upon anyone
to punish them or to teach them a lesson.
- Ernest Holmes

I'm not religious at all,
but I believe in God very strongly.
- Bono

I don't believe in God but I'm very interested in her.
- Arthur C. Clarke

I believe that the way people live can be directed
a little by architecture.
- Tadao Ando

Faith keeps many doubts in her pay.
If I could not doubt, I should not believe.
- Henry David Thoreau

Protecting the institution of marriage safeguards,
I believe, the American family.
- John Boehner

Believe those who are seeking the truth.
Doubt those who find it.
- Andre Gide

I do not believe in the God of the theologians;
but that there is a Supreme Intelligence I do not doubt.
- Thomas Edison

I believe in the imagination.
What I cannot see is infinitely more important than what I can see.
- Duane Michals

Reality is what you believe it to be.
It's what you put your thought and energy into,
because your hands physically manifest thought.
So your world becomes what you feel and what you think.
- Jewel

Without music, life would be a mistake...
I would only believe in a God who knew how to dance.
- Friedrich Nietzsche

I don't believe one grows older.
I think that what happens early on in life is that
at a certain age one stands still and stagnates.
- T. S. Eliot

I believe that a man is the strongest soldier
for daring to die unarmed.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

I do not believe in the God of theology
who rewards good and punishes evil.
- Albert Einstein

Modern people are only willing to believe in their computers,
while I believe in myself.
- Alain Robert


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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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