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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Other Quotes
Funny Quotes about Other

Let these funny Other Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

Knowing your own darkness is the best method
for dealing with the darknesses of other people.
- Carl Jung

Half the world is composed of idiots,
the other half, of people clever enough
to take indecent advantage of them.
- Walter Kerr

I have six locks on my door all in a row.
When I go out, I lock every other one.
I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks,
they are always locking three.
- Elayne Boosler

Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.
- Mark Twain


 

There's a couple of things they don't teach you
in Harvard Business School,
one is how to cope with defeat,
the other is how to handle a shotgun.
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)

The time-traveling is just too dangerous.
Better that I devote myself to study
the other great mystery of the universe - women!
- the movie Back to the Future II

I was sleeping the other night, alone,
thanks to the exterminator.
- Emo Philips


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A James Cagney love scene is one where he lets the other guy live.
- Bob Hope

The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American
recently passed each other in opposite directions.
- George Carlin

I have great hopes that we shall love each other all our lives
as much as if we had never married at all.
- Lord Byron

Let your sympathies and your compassion
be always with the under dog in the fight -
this is magnanimity;
but bet on the other one - this is business.
- Mark Twain

The church is always trying to get other people to reform;
it might not be a bad idea to reform itself a little,
by way of example.
- Mark Twain

A New Year's resolution is something that
goes in one Year and out the other.
- Anonymous

In life you are given two ends;
one to think with and the other to sit on.
Your success in life depends on which end you use most.
Heads you win, tails you lose.
- Conrad Burns

Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans.
- John Lennon

Do you feel stuck?
Whether in a project, a job, a relationship,
or some other situation,
there is a time for perseverance,
and a time for letting go and moving on.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

In soloing - as in other activities -
it is far easier to start something
than it is to finish it.
- Amelia Earhart

Experience keeps a dear school,
but fools will learn in no other.
- Benjamin Franklin

When written in Chinese, the word "crisis"
is composed of two characters.
One represents danger and the other represents opportunity.
- John F. Kennedy

Difference of opinion is advantageous in religion.
The several sects perform the office of a Censor -
over each other.
- Thomas Jefferson

History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely
only after they have exhausted all other alternatives.
- Abba Eban

Thaw with her gentle persuasion is more powerful
than Thor with his hammer.
The one melts, the other breaks into pieces.
- Henry David Thoreau

Be smarter than other people, just don't tell them so.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

I am sorry to say that there is too much point to the wisecrack
that life is extinct on other planets
because their scientists were more advanced than ours.
- John F. Kennedy

I am not the same having seen the moon shine
on the other side of the world.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

We will not learn how to live together in peace
by killing each other's children.
- Jimmy Carter

If we have no peace,
it is because we have forgotten
that we belong to each other.
- Mother Teresa

Capitalism tries for a delicate balance:
It attempts to work things out so that
everyone gets just enough stuff to keep them from
getting violent and trying to take other people's stuff.
- George Carlin

Could a greater miracle take place
than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?
- Henry David Thoreau

I contend that we are both atheists.
I just believe in one fewer god than you do.
When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods,
you will understand why I dismiss yours.
- Stephen Roberts

There are only two ways to live your life.
One is as though nothing is a miracle.
The other is as though everything is a miracle.
- Albert Einstein

Fear defeats more people than
any other one thing in the world.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

If (s)he's an apple and you're an orange,
celebrate your differences -
make a great fruit salad.
Love isn't about being the same -
it's about being sweet with each other.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Love is when the other person's happiness
is more important than your own.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

The greatest lovers are like twin blooms,
each reflecting the passion and the glory of the other.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If we are not happy and joyous at this season,
for what other season shall we wait and
for what other time shall we look?
- Abdul-Baha

Good manners sometimes means simply
putting up with other people's bad manners.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

Today is a day to honor other cultures.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Real excellence and humility are
not incompatible one with the other,
on the contrary they are twin sisters.
- Jean Baptiste Lacordaire

Other people do not have to change
for us to experience peace of mind.
- Gerald Jampolsky

Every man has his own courage,
and is betrayed because he seeks in himself
the courage of other persons.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

A life is not important except in
the impact it has on other lives.
- Jackie Robinson (baseball player)

We are afraid to care too much, for fear
that the other person does not care at all.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Don't look for approval from anyone other than yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

We are injured and hurt emotionally,
not so much by other people
or what they say and don't say,
but by our own attitude and our own response.
- Maxwell Maltz

Happiness blooms
in the presence of self-respect
and the absence of ego.
Love yourself.
Love everyone around you.
Love everyone in the whole world.
Know that your own life is of infinite importance,
as is every other life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Nothing other people do is because of you.
It is because of themselves
- don Miguel Ruiz

We have nearly complete misunderstanding between
people of different faiths in Lake Wobegon,
and that's probably one reason why we get along so very well.
It's when you are trying to convince another person to think
the same way that you do that there is
friction and trouble between people.
But when you feel that the other person is
dumber than dirt, too dumb for words -
why waste your breath - you get along pretty well.
There's no bond between people that's quite so strong as
when people each feel slightly superior towards the other one.
- Garrison Keillor

Because we believe that our ethnic group,
our society, our political party, our God,
is better than your God, we kill each other.
- Neale Donald Walsch

Each man's life touches so many other lives.
- It's a Wonderful Life (1946 movie)

You cannot divorce religious belief and public service.
I've never detected any conflict between
God's will and my political duty.
If you violate one, you violate the other.
- Jimmy Carter

Part of me suspects that I'm a loser,
and the other part of me thinks I'm God Almighty.
- John Lennon

I have found that among its other benefits,
giving liberates the soul of the giver.
- Maya Angelou

The best thing to hold onto in life is each other.
- Audrey Hepburn

No distance of place or lapse of time can lessen the friendship
of those who are thoroughly persuaded of each other's worth.
- Robert Southey

Leadership and learning are indispensable to each other.
- John F. Kennedy

Just as a man would not cherish living
in a body other than his own,
so do nations not like to live under other nations,
however noble and great the latter may be.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Patriotism is when love of your own people comes first;
nationalism,
when hate for people other than your own comes first.
- Charles de Gaulle

Ninety percent of the politicians give the other ten
percent a bad reputation.
- Henry A. Kissinger

Sometimes when you innovate, you make mistakes.
It is best to admit them quickly, and get on with improving your other innovations.
- Steve Jobs

I am not ashamed to say that no man I ever met was my father's equal,
and I never loved any other man as much.
- Hedy Lamarr

When friends stop being frank and useful to each other,
the whole world loses some of its radiance.
- Anatole Broyard

A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something
he can learn in no other way.
- Mark Twain

You cannot hate other people without hating yourself.
- Oprah Winfrey

What do we live for, if it is not
to make life less difficult for each other?
- George Eliot

A happy arrangement: many people prefer cats to other people,
and many cats prefer people to other cats.
- Mason Cooley

There are other measures of self-respect for a man,
than the number of clean shirts he puts on every day.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Marriage is the alliance of two people,
one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them.
- Ogden Nash

My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four.
Unless there are three other people.
- Orson Welles

Many people excuse their own faults
but judge other persons harshly.
We should reverse this attitude
by excusing others' shortcomings
and by harshly examining our own.
- Paramahansa Yogananda

Business, more than any other occupation,
is a continual dealing with the future;
it is a continual calculation,
an instinctive exercise in foresight.
- Henry R. Luce


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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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