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Let these funny Sloth Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
A sloth lives a pretty good life, s-l-o-w-l-y.
Maybe we have something to learn from him.
Some days, being sloth-like may be just what you need
to avoid being consumed by urgency.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
An unclean person is universally a slothful one.
- Henry David Thoreau
I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner
The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all
is the person who argues with him.
- Stanislaw Jerszy Lec
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I've become the person I've always hated, but I'm happier.
- the Woody Allen movie Celebrity
And you, Sonja, you look more beautiful
standing here than you do in person.
- the movie Love and Death (1975)
Inside every cynical person,
there is a disappointed idealist.
- George Carlin
The person who says it cannot be done
should not interrupt the person who is doing it.
- Chinese proverb
Credit is a system whereby a person who can't pay
gets another person who can't pay
to guarantee that he can pay.
- Charles Dickens
Tell me about a person's family, friends, and community,
and I'll tell you what his opinions are.
- Mark Twain
(paraphrase)
What would be the use of immortality to a person
who cannot use well a half an hour.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism.
To steal from many is research.
- Anonymous
I can't go back to yesterday -
because I was a different person then.
- Lewis Carroll
Think of how stupid the average person is,
and realize half of them are stupider than that.
- George Carlin
A person who never made a mistake
never tried anything new.
- Albert Einstein
What sane person could live in this world and not be crazy?
- Ursula K. Le Guin
A person is smart. People are dumb,
panicky dangerous animals and you know it.
Fifteen hundred years ago everybody knew
the Earth was the center of the universe.
Five hundred years ago,
everybody knew the Earth was flat,
and fifteen minutes ago,
you knew that humans were alone on this planet.
Imagine what you'll know tomorrow.
- the movie Men in Black
Love is when the other person's happiness
is more important than your own.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
Friendship is born at that moment
when one person says to another,
"What! You too? I thought I was the only one."
- C. S. Lewis
Man is least himself when he talks in his own person.
Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.
- Oscar Wilde
The moment a person forms a theory,
his imagination sees in every object
only the traits which favor that theory.
- Thomas Jefferson
A competent and self-confident person is
incapable of jealousy in anything.
Jealousy is invariably a symptom of neurotic insecurity.
- Robert A. Heinlein
It takes a long while for a naturally trustful person
to reconcile himself to the idea that
after all God will not help him
- H. L. Mencken
Resenting someone, or hating someone, ensures that
you can never emotionally escape that person.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A person who trusts no one can't be trusted.
- Jerome Blattner
We have nearly complete misunderstanding between
people of different faiths in Lake Wobegon,
and that's probably one reason why we get along so very well.
It's when you are trying to convince another person to think
the same way that you do that there is
friction and trouble between people.
But when you feel that the other person is
dumber than dirt, too dumb for words -
why waste your breath - you get along pretty well.
There's no bond between people that's quite so strong as
when people each feel slightly superior towards the other one.
- Garrison Keillor
A person isn't who they are during
the last conversation you had with them -
they're who they've been
throughout your whole relationship.
- Rainer Maria Rilke
The shoe that fits one person pinches another;
there is no recipe for living that suits all cases.
- Carl Jung
The person who you're with most in life is yourself
and if you don't like yourself,
you're always with somebody you don't like.
- Marc S. Lewis
Jealousy is that pain which a man feels
from the apprehension that he is not equally beloved
by the person whom he entirely loves.
- Joseph Addison
Good for who? Good for what?
There is no absolute "good."
"Good" is simply one person's preference.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
It was high counsel that I once heard given to a young person,
"Always do what you are afraid to do."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
We are afraid to care too much, for fear
that the other person does not care at all.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
If the person you are talking to doesn't appear to be listening, be patient.
It may simply be that he has a small piece of fluff in his ear.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
If one does not understand a person,
one tends to regard him as a fool.
- Carl Jung
Never say goodbye when you still want to try,
never give up when you still feel you can't take it.
Never say you don't love the person anymore
when you can't let go.
- Anonymous
Resenting someone is a way of never leaving that person.
- Kare Anderson
We know what a person thinks not when he tells us
what he thinks, but by his actions.
- Isaac Bashevis Singe
Truth is absolute, but only to one person.
My truth is absolute to me, and your truth is absolute to you.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
It hurts to love someone
and not be loved in return,
but what is more painful is to love
someone and never find the courage
to let that person know how you feel.
- Anonymous
There is an optical illusion about every person we meet.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The most pathetic person in the world
is someone who has sight, but has no vision.
- Helen Keller
Being unwanted, unloved, uncared for, forgotten by everybody,
I think that is a much greater hunger,
a much greater poverty than the person who has nothing to eat.
- Mother Teresa
No person was ever honored for what he received.
Honor has been the reward for what he gave.
- Calvin Coolidge
When a person doesn't have gratitude,
something is missing in his or her humanity.
A person can almost be defined by
his or her attitude toward gratitude.
- Elie Wiesel
If I choose to bless another person,
I will always end up feeling more blessed.
- Marianne Williamson
I have never met an aggressive person
who wasn't a fearful person.
- John Bradshaw
Do not wait for leaders;
do it alone, person to person.
- Mother Teresa
The final forming of a person's character
lies in their own hands.
- Anne Frank
It is more dangerous that even
a guilty person should be punished
without the forms of law
than that he should escape.
- Thomas Jefferson
A sense of humor... is needed armor.
Joy in one's heart and some laughter on one's lips
is a sign that the person down deep
has a pretty good grasp of life.
- Hugh Sidey
I think the person who takes a job in order to live -
that is to say, for the money -
has turned himself into a slave.
- Joseph Campbell
To educate a person in mind and not in morals
is to educate a menace to society.
- Theodore Roosevelt
There is no goodness in attempting to coerce
another person into performing a good deed.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Don't marry the person you think you can live with;
marry only the individual you think you can't live without.
- James C. Dobson
Important ideas can come from unexpected places.
We tend to label people - Genius, Idiot,
Socialist, Regressive, Wingnut, Revolutionary, Terrorist.
But it is helpful to remind ourselves to be open
to good ideas - whatever their source.
It is equally important to avoid accepting any idea
merely because we respect that person's
other ideas or accomplishments.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If there is any one secret of success,
it lies in the ability to get
the other person's point of view
and see things from that person's angle
as well as from your own.
- Henry Ford
Never allow a person to tell you NO
who doesn't have the power to say YES.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
True love means putting the other person before yourself,
and honoring the relationship above all.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The difference between a successful person and others
is not a lack of strength,
not a lack of knowledge,
but rather a lack of will.
- Vince Lombardi
As a happy person, you radiate happiness to the world.
Visualize your light radiating throughout the world,
passing from person to person until it encircles the globe.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
There is only one way... to get anybody to do anything.
And that is by making the other person want to do it.
- Dale Carnegie
Only one who devotes himself to a cause
with his whole strength and soul
can be a true master.
For this reason mastery demands all of a person.
- Albert Einstein
An optimist is a person who sees a green light everywhere,
while the pessimist sees only the red stoplight.
The truly wise person is colorblind.
- Albert Schweitzer
For everything observed or experienced,
each of us creates a "story" - not sometimes, but always.
A "story" is the fiction a person tells themselves
about what has happened or is happening.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If you don't take full responsibility
for your own happiness,
who do you suppose will?
Your happiness is a one person job -
it begins and ends with you.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The moment there is suspicion about a person's motives,
everything he does becomes tainted.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
You don't marry someone you can live with,
you marry the person who you cannot live without.
- Anonymous
To the world you may be one person,
but to one person you may be the world.
- Anonymous (attributed to Bill Wilson, Brandi Snyder and others)
See God in every person, place, and thing,
and all will be well in your world.
- Louise L. Hay
Nothing gives one person so much advantage over another
as to remain always cool and unruffled under all circumstances.
- Thomas Jefferson
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.