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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Couple Quotes
Funny Quotes about Couple

Let these funny Couple Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

Life is like jumping out of an airplane without a parachute -
only the last couple seconds are fatal,
but most people are scared to death the whole way down.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

There's a couple of things they don't teach you
in Harvard Business School,
one is how to cope with defeat,
the other is how to handle a shotgun.
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)

If you made a list of reasons why any couple got married,
and another list of the reasons for their divorce,
you'd have a hell of a lot of overlapping.
- Mignon McLaughlin

The only people who benefit from lawsuits are lawyers.
I think we made a couple of them rich.
- Gavin Rossdale


 

Give me a couple of years, and I'll make that actress an overnight success.
- Samuel Goldwyn

On rare occasions one does hear of a miraculous case
of a married couple falling in love after marriage,
but on close examination it will be found that it is
a mere adjustment to the inevitable.
- Emma Goldman

I'm lucky because I have a job I love.
I really miss being away from home, being in my own bed,
seeing my animals and siblings, having my moms cookies.
I have a couple cats.
I got a kitten about a year ago and now Im going on
the road so I wont see him for a while.
I feel bad.
- Michelle Branch


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For the past couple of years I've been pretty bored with music in general...
just bored with it.
- Les Claypool

She's 32, and she has three children.
She loves to be pregnant but she doesn't want anymore children in her life.
So she decided to help another couple.
And she's just been amazing.
- Cheryl Tiegs

Every couple I know has side-by-side grave plots,
but when we do it we're the biggest weirdos on the block.
- Billy Bob Thornton

Right now we're working on finishing up Pirates!
for the Xbox, we're developing Civilization IV and
we've got a couple other games in development that
we'll tell you about soon.
- Sid Meier

You guys are the best.
I'll see you in a couple of hours.
I haven't seen another human being in 13 hours and
I'm running out of bottles for my urine.
Later guys!
- Chris Kattan

I dressed up as a veterinarian for a Halloween costume party.
I had the lab coat.
I got a couple of stuffed animals for patients and put bandages on them.
- Tracy Chapman

I remember a tour where we played 50 cities in 56 days.
We also went to Europe a couple of times.
- Jack Irons

As far as I'm concerned, love means fighting,
big fat lies, and a couple of slaps across the face.
- Edith Piaf

So I had a couple of years of playing trumpet.
I really enjoyed it, but it was not the kind of instrument
you could whip out at a party.
Let's face it.
- Jackson Browne

I only work every couple of years.
I go into retirement between films.
- Paul Hogan

Both sides have been playing tremendous cricket over
a couple of years and they're both very good units.
- Matthew Hayden

We are meeting with Sony, and we have a couple of other
labels that suddenly have interest and that's really
great because none of them have actually heard our stuff.
- Shane West

Those two are a fastidious couple.
She's fast and he's hideous.
- Henny Youngman

I'm about to challenge for the Maryland Cup in the next couple of years,
as an owner, a trainer, and a rider.
- Davy Jones

It's like a dream to come to Spain and stay for a couple
of years and get somebody to teach me Spanish music.
- Lenny Kravitz

I asked a French critic a couple of years ago why my
books did so well in France.
He said it was because in my novels people both act and think.
I got a kick out of that.
- Jim Harrison

The Internet is no longer the kind of thing where only
six guys in the world can build it.
Now, you can write a couple of checks and get one of your own.
- Paul Vixie

If I didn't want to work for a couple of years,
I wouldn't have to-it's a great feeling,
to know I'm doing it because I want to do it.
- Tracey Emin

We're talking to New Line.
They've got a couple projects they're interested in
me doing and I'm having meetings at MGM.
There's a lot of available projects.
- David R. Ellis

Chicago's buoy was a couple of hundred yards astern of Arizona,
and I was saddened to look at her.
- Jack Adams

I've stolen a couple of hearts and they are in my private collection!
- Salma Hayek

If you're a young couple when you start out and are both working,
trying to raise children, that is tough.
- Eric Braeden

Bob Dylan's first couple of records in the 60's weren't
considered cover records,
but he only wrote one or two original songs on each album.
- John Mellencamp

I'd just like to prove to myself that I'm all here
and all together and can get the best out of myself.
I'd also like to prove that to a couple of other people.
- Roy Harper

Well, I needed the work - that's the honest answer.
I haven't worked for a while, a couple of years.
So I thought it would be nice to get back to work and earn some money.
- Gary Oldman

I asked a couple of months ago if anyone would like
to start picketing the gas stations.
- Ron Ziegler

If you start throwing hedgehogs under me,
I shall throw a couple of porcupines under you.
- Nikita Khrushchev

Although I have to admit I have despised a couple of
people simply because they have never had a job in their lives.
- Jeffrey Bernard

I hadn't worked for a couple of years so I thought
it would be nice to earn some money and pay the bills.
- Gary Oldman

I have a home in Arizona.
I go a couple months a year, but basically Chicago is my home.
- Dennis Farina

In a couple, sometimes, one or both people have to
give up their personal life,
dreams and ambitions for the good of the family.
- Monica Bellucci

Every week Rangers have different former players come out at half-time.
Spurs should have a couple a former players on the board,
who know what the supporters want.
- Graham Roberts

Racing Stripes was so much fun to do.
It's one of the funniest movies I've seen in a couple years.
- Bruce Greenwood

I'm reading scripts, desperately wanting to work.
I've set a couple of things up for next year.
- Charlie Hunnam

We all need to take a deep breath and think about being
a Bush daughter and having that cross to bear.
I'd go out and have a couple of drinks too.
- Julia Roberts

It takes a couple of years just to get the background
and knowledge that you need before you can go into
detailed training for your mission.
- Sally Ride

A few of us who are around the sixty mark don't play
that much these days and if you are taking on a couple
of guys in their forties it is very difficult.
- John Newcombe

Before trying a novel I wrote a couple of plays.
- James Merrill

We feel that there are so many kids who need adopting.
We thought we'd do it after having a couple of our own,
but we just changed our mind.
- Hugh Jackman

I have just come from a couple of raids,
where we had a very lively time, and some of them had to pull their guns.
I found it necessary to punch a few sports myself.
- Richard H. Davis

Well, I do have some maiden aunts that are not quite
like the aunts in the book,
but I definitely do have a couple of them,
and a couple of old aunties.
- Donna Tartt

And I have a couple swimsuit calendars I did that are coming out.
- Trishelle Cannatella

When you retire you want to get as far away as possible
from the game for a couple of years.
- Pete Sampras

I would like to host a show, something like travel
or cooking or something like that,
something I'm really interested in, and so I'm pitching
a couple television shows.
- Trishelle Cannatella

Yes, I've already done a couple of guest voices.
- Gary Cole

Kazan was an old friend, I met him in 1938.
He picked up radio jobs for eating money,
so I met him on a couple of radio shows.
Later on I was in a play he directed.
- Richard Widmark

Oh, yeah, I love DVD's.
I don't have what you'd call an extensive collection,
maybe a couple of hundred or so.
But I have something on almost all the time.
- David Fincher

I always thought of myself as some sort of athlete
until I started playing golf a couple years ago.
- James Caan

Now you know those trick candles that you blow out and a couple of seconds.
- Tim Vine

Ozzy wanted to get us back together.
It's been 20 years.
We did a couple of songs during his farewell in 1992
and that got the ball rolling.
- Geezer Butler

I got a couple on per album but my problem was that
I wanted to sing the songs and not let Roger sing them.
- John Entwistle

I couldn't do anything.
I'd work in a department store for a couple of weeks,
but I couldn't hack it.
I couldn't even type!
I had no skills whatsoever outside of show business.
- Helen Reddy

We played some gigs in Switzerland a couple of weeks
ago and it was the first time I really felt the group
was really a band in the sense of something I could write for.
- Fred Frith

Obviously, I did a couple of things right on the old casting couch.
- Jason Bateman

If I move one way, I lose a couple votes.
If I move another way, I lose a couple votes.
- Charles Grassley

There's a couple of tracks on the new record which
is sort of using similar sort of rhythms as the drum
and bass tracks but playing it all live.
It's a new approach to it.
- Tom Jenkinson

My wife is Danish and we go to Denmark a couple of times a year.
- Ted Shackelford

I had heard Ornette a couple of times,
but I didn't really know where he was coming from until
we started the record and it was beautiful,
Fred.
It opened up my mind.
- Freddie Hubbard

But whether a couple is a man and a woman has everything
to do with the meaning of marriage.
- Jack Kingston

Doing this James Brown thing for the last couple of days has been ideal.
But it's a different kind of fun.
- Jules Shear

I cannot sustain hate for longer than a couple of years.
- Mercedes McCambridge

I've been around since I was 19, I won the Oscar when I was 21,
I've had a couple of TV series.
I've continued to work despite the predictions of some naysayers.
- Marlee Matlin

If you are a gay couple living in Alabama,
you know one thing: your family has no standing under the law;
and it can and will be violated by strangers.
- Andrew Sullivan

The more I do bookstores, the more people come up to me from church groups.
I spoke at Pittsburg State College and had 2 or 3 ministers
and book groups from a couple of churches.
- Anita Diament


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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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