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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Harvard Quotes
Funny Quotes about Harvard

Let these funny Harvard Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

There's a couple of things they don't teach you
in Harvard Business School,
one is how to cope with defeat,
the other is how to handle a shotgun.
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)

Harvard takes perfectly good plums as students,
and turns them into prunes.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

We are tired of aristocratic explanations in Harvard words.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

Life is like jumping out of an airplane without a parachute -
only the last couple seconds are fatal,
but most people are scared to death the whole way down.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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Life ... full of loneliness, and misery,
and suffering, and unhappiness,
and it's all over much too quickly.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall

Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz

Morality is simply the attitude we adopt
towards people whom we personally dislike.
- Oscar Wilde


 

It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble.
It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
- Mark Twain (attributed)

I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner

The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all
is the person who argues with him.
- Stanislaw Jerszy Lec

The trick is growing up without growing old.
- Casey Stengel

Life's like Vegas. You're up, you're down,
but in the end the house always wins.
Doesn't mean you didn't have fun.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.
- Mark Twain

Life is serious, get out your magic wand.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

In the book of life, the answers aren't in the back.
- Charles M. Schulz in his Peanuts cartoon

Life is a journey - enjoy the journey.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life only
appears to be
rushing toward us
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

One does not leave a convivial party before closing time.
- Winston Churchill

To the young child, all life is a great adventure -
when did we grow so dull and brittle.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born
at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.
- Mark Twain

One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.
- Ogden Nash

The most difficult phase of life
is not when no one understands you,
it is when you don't understand yourself.
- Anonymous

You can't make an omelet without breaking eggs.
- Anonymous

Old age is fifteen years older than I am.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans.
- John Lennon

Live life on the edge, not with an edge.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
- Oscar Wilde

Life is defined more by its contrasts than its samenesses;
Life is defined more by its risks than the many securities.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

The difference between school and life?
In school, you're taught a lesson and then given a test.
In life, you're given a test that teaches you a lesson.
- Tom Bodett

Life is always lived in the eye-of-the-storm
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

No matter how much cats fight,
there always seem to be plenty of kittens.
- Abraham Lincoln

If life is a trial, who is the judge and jury?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Some things will never seem adequate
no matter how hard we try.
- from the movie White Man's Burden

Life is too important to be taken seriously.
- Oscar Wilde

Life's burdens are lighter when I laugh at myself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The most powerful force in the universe is: gossip.
- Dave Barry

Most men lead lives of quiet desperation
and go to the grave with the song still in them.
- Henry David Thoreau

Feeling sorry for yourself, and your present condition,
is not only a waste of energy
but the worst habit you could possibly have.
- Dale Carnegie

Success is failure recycled.
Life is death reborn.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

A big part of letting go is recognizing
when it is time to stay in a situation
and when it is time to move on.
- Darren L. Johnson

Every man prefers belief to the exercise of judgment.
- Lucius Annaeus Seneca

You don't have the power to make life "fair,"
but you do have the power to make life joyful.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I have found that if you love life,
life will love you back.
- Arthur Rubinstein

Do you feel stuck?
Whether in a project, a job, a relationship,
or some other situation,
there is a time for perseverance,
and a time for letting go and moving on.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The essence of life is not in
the great victories and grand failures,
but in the simple joys.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...
It's about learning to Dance in the Rain.
- Vivian Greene

Bringing a childlike wonder
and a beginner's mind to life
maximizes both success and joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

When dealing with people, remember you are
not dealing with creatures of logic,
but creatures of emotion.
- Dale Carnegie

Life is a reflection of intent.
Love reflects love.
Hate reflects hate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

You are Never Too Old to Give or Get Gold Stars.
Show Your Honest Appreciation - Today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It's never too late -
never too late to start over,
never too late to be happy.
- Jane Fonda

All diseases run into one - old age.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

It is hard enough to remember my opinions,
without also remembering my reasons for them!
- Friedrich Nietzsche

Life is as easy or as hard as you think it is.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I don't believe in the after life,
although I am bringing a change of underwear.
- Woody Allen

Here's a toast to your new bride who has everything a girl
could want in her life, except for good taste in men.
- Anonymous

Thousands of candles can be lit from a single candle,
and the life of the candle will not be shortened.
Happiness never decreases by being shared.
- The Buddha

Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.
- George Carlin

The power of man has grown in every sphere, except over himself.
- Winston Churchill

Life is best when I wish neither to hurry the future nor to slow it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

We make our friends; we make our enemies;
but God makes our next-door neighbor.
- Gilbert (G. K.) Chesterton

Knowing your own darkness is the best method
for dealing with the darknesses of other people.
- Carl Jung

Is today a day to gather strength from the storm -
a day to to learn life lessons for the next battle?
Or is today a day to sit by the fire
and watch the storm rage outside?
Either way, the storm is just life.
Give thanks for all of Life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

We have a great life here in Alaska,
and we're never going back to America again!
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)

If life is a bowl of cherries, then what am I doing in the pits?
- Erma Bombeck

Two things a man should never be angry at:
what he can help,
and what he cannot help.
- Thomas Fuller

It is a truth universally acknowledged that
when one part of your life starts going okay,
another falls spectacularly to pieces.
- the movie Bridget Jones Diary

Play with life, laugh with life,
dance lightly with life,
and smile at the riddles of life,
knowing that life's only true lessons
are writ small in the margin.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel

The essence of all religions is one.
Only their approaches are different.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Anyone who isn't confused,
really doesn't understand the situation.
- Edward R. Murrow


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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