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Let these funny Contraception Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
I'm actually starting to like more and more people
who have convictions that are unpopular.
Now at what point does an unpopular conviction
interfere with your own human rights?
Forced female circumcision, for instance.
The Catholic Church's stance on contraception.
The list goes on. You know, God has some really weird kids,
and I find it hard to be in their company most of the time.
- Bono
NO ONE is really different;
each of us is actually a member of the human race.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I actually enjoy being out of my depth - I thrive on it.
- Bono
I'm actually starting to like more and more people
who have convictions that are unpopular.
-Bono
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As we let our light shine,
we unconsciously give other people
permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear,
our presence actually liberates others.
- Marianne Williamson
Few are the giants of the soul that actually feel
that the human race is their family circle.
- Freya Stark
Every known fact in natural science was divined
by the presentiment of somebody,
before it was actually verified.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Almost nothing you worry about today
will matter in a hundred years.
Think carefully about what you can focus on today.
Choose tasks that will actually make a positive difference
to your great-grandchildren.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves,
Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God.
Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine,
we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear,
our presence automatically liberates others.
- Marianne Williamson
Just stop it. Seriously.
Whatever it is. Just stop it.
If only for an hour, a day, a week.
Stop doing it long enough to get a glimpse
of what the change would actually look like.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Do real life people actually fall in love
with the idea of being in love?
Unfortunately, it is actually quite common.
Someone wants desperately to have
the husband or wife of their dreams.
They visualize the vine-covered cottage
with the white picket fence.
They choose the colors for the nursery.
They design all the aspects of their married life.
A real person stands no chance of measuring up to those fantasies.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
In a bad marriage, friends are the invisible glue.
If we have enough friends, we may go on for years,
intending to leave, talking about leaving -
instead of actually getting up and leaving.
- Erica Jong
It is our duty still to endeavor to avoid war;
but if it shall actually take place, no matter by whom brought on,
we must defend ourselves.
If our house be on fire, without inquiring whether
it was fired from within or without,
we must try to extinguish it.
- Thomas Jefferson
I think one of the finest gifts I can give
my friends in the holiday season is to pause
with a long enough quality to actually SEE them.
My calm, unhurried presence communicates
this gift of a message, "I see you. I recognize you.
I remember our times of together
and am contributing right now to another quality memory.
I value you and honor and take the time,
right this moment to pause long enough to truly notice you."
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Feel Unity with Spirit and All Creation
All things share the same breath the
beast, the tree, the man... the air
shares its spirit with all the life it supports.
- Chief Seattle [actually written by screenwriter Ted Perry in 1972]
"Mother Teresa Prayer"
People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered;
... Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you
of selfish, ulterior motives;
... Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some
false friends and some true enemies;
... Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;
... Be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;
... Build anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous;
... Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;
... Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough;
... Give the world the best you've got anyway.
You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God;
It was never between you and them anyway.
We can do no great things - only small things with great love.
- although commonly attributed to Mother Teresa,
who kept a copy of this prayer on
the wall of her Calcutta orphanage,
this prayer was actually written by Kent Keith.
Each of us holds a different image of God.
There are as many perspectives on
the nature of God as there are people.
However much any of us may choose to argue,
or to fight and kill, for our point of view,
the nature of God is an unanswerable question.
Perhaps there is a specific answer,
that we will never learn - in this lifetime.
Perhaps the nature of God is so complex and multifaceted
that each view of God describes an aspect of the complex whole.
Or perhaps the nature of God is actually defined by our beliefs.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer
No matter how much cats fight,
there always seem to be plenty of kittens.
- Abraham Lincoln
No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous
I have no fear of the gallows ... They're going to shoot me.
- the movie Love and Death
Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed.
But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops.
Uh, depending on the breaks.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove
When I eventually met Mr. Right
I had no idea that his first name was Always.
- Rita Rudner
One cannot have everything the way he would like it.
A man has no business to be depressed by a disappointment,
anyway; he ought to make up his mind to get even.
- Mark Twain
No one knows what's next, but everybody does it.
- George Carlin
Television has a real problem. They have no page two.
- Art Buchwald
There's no reason to become alarmed,
and we hope you'll enjoy the rest of your flight.
By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?
- the movie Airplane!
A man's friendships are, like his will,
invalidated by marriage -
but they are also no less invalidated
by the marriage of his friends.
- Samuel Butler
A honeymoon should be like a table:
four bare legs and no drawers.
- Anonymous
Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life, son.
- the movie National Lampoon's Animal House (1978)
Oh no, I can't do anything to the death.
Doctor's orders. You see, I have this ulcer condition,
and death is the worst thing for it.
- the movie Love and Death
And you just gotta remember, Sparky -
no matter what they tell you - you can NEVER have too much sugar.
- the movie Michael (1996)
No one can have a higher opinion of you than I have,
and I think you're a slimy, contemptible sewer rat!
- the movie The Great Mouse Detective
Marriage has no guarantees.
If that's what you're looking for,
go live with a car battery.
- Erma Bombeck
Do not bite at the bait of pleasure,
till you know there is no hook beneath it.
- Thomas Jefferson
It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel
The man who does not read good books
has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
- Mark Twain
Early in life I had to choose between honest arrogance
and hypocritical humility.
I chose the former and have seen no reason to change.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
The way to silence religious disputes is to take no notice of them.
- Thomas Jefferson
When all think alike, no one is thinking very much.
- Walter Lippmann
There is no use whatsoever trying to help
people who do not help themselves.
You cannot push anyone up a ladder
unless he is willing to climb himself.
- Andrew Carnegie
He who loves 50 people has 50 woes;
he who loves no one has no woes.
- The Buddha
I begin with the principle that all men are bores.
Surely no one will prove himself
so great a bore as to contradict me in this.
- Soren Kierkegaard
It has been my experience that folks who
have no vices, have very few virtues.
- Abraham Lincoln
There is no sadder sight than a young pessimist.
- Mark Twain
Some people are so heavenly minded
that they are no earthly good.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
Computers are like Old Testament gods;
lots of rules and no mercy.
- Joseph Campbell
The worst government is often the most moral.
One composed of cynics is often very tolerant and humane.
But when fanatics are on top there is no limit to oppression.
- H. L. Mencken
Faced with the choice between changing one's mind
and proving that there is no need to do so,
almost everyone gets busy on the proof.
- John Kenneth Galbraith
I am no longer young enough to know everything.
- Oscar Wilde
The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears,
for there's no risk of accident for someone who's dead.
- Albert Einstein
No problem is so formidable that
you can't walk away from it.
- Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts
Some things will never seem adequate
no matter how hard we try.
- from the movie White Man's Burden
There is no pleasure in having nothing to do;
the fun is in having lots to do and not doing it.
- Mary Wilson Little
Every one desires to live long,
but no one would be old.
- Abraham Lincoln
The most difficult phase of life
is not when no one understands you,
it is when you don't understand yourself.
- Anonymous
In theory there is no difference between theory and practice.
In practice there is.
- Yogi Berra
You have no values. With you its all nihilism,
cynicism, sarcasm, and orgasm.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
Clothes make the man.
Naked people have little or no influence on society.
- Mark Twain
He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.
- Oscar Wilde
The universe we observe has precisely
the properties we should expect
if there is, at bottom, no design,
no purpose, no evil, no good,
nothing but blind, pitiless indifference.
- Charles Darwin
I find that principles have no real force
except when one is well fed.
- Mark Twain
An excellent man;
he has no enemies;
and none of his friends like him.
- Oscar Wilde
Less is only more where more is no good.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
If at first you don't succeed,
try, try, and try again.
Then give up.
There's no use being a damned fool about it.
- W. C. Fields
Random chance seems to have operated in our favor ...
there was no deity involved.
- Spock character in the Star Trek television series
Experience keeps a dear school,
but fools will learn in no other.
- Benjamin Franklin
As soon as someone is identified as an unsung hero,
he no longer is.
- George Carlin
It is the things for which there is no evidence
that are believed with passion.
- Bertrand Russell
No one was ever named "Hero" for following the crowd.
Heroes set their own course.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Science may have found a cure for most evils;
but it has found no remedy for the worst of them all -
the apathy of human beings.
- Helen Keller
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.