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When a man you like switches from what
he said a year ago, or four years ago,
he is a broad-minded person who has courage enough
to change his mind with changing conditions.
When a man you don't like does it,
he is a liar who has broken his promise.
- Franklin Pierce Adams
Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand 
A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.
- W. C. Fields
A man wrapped up in himself makes a very small bundle.
- Benjamin Franklin
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One cannot have everything the way he would like it.
A man has no business to be depressed by a disappointment,
anyway; he ought to make up his mind to get even.
- Mark Twain
A man likes his wife to be
just clever enough to appreciate his cleverness,
and just stupid enough to admire it.
- Israel Zangwill
A man is incomplete until he is married.
After that, he is finished.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln
Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West
Don't marry a man to reform him -
that's what reform schools are for.
- Mae West
A man's friendships are, like his will,
invalidated by marriage -
but they are also no less invalidated
by the marriage of his friends.
- Samuel Butler
In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland
One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.
- Ogden Nash
Afraid? Me? A man who's licked
his weight in wild caterpillars?
Afraid? You bet I'm afraid!
- Groucho Marx
No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous
Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy,
the first question I ask myself is:
is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?
- Rita Rudner
One man's theology is another man's belly laugh.
- Robert A. Heinlein
He's the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of.
- Mae West
Barf: I'm a mog: half man, half dog. I'm my own best friend!
- the movie Spaceballs (1987)
I am a man of fixed and unbending principles,
the first of which is to be flexible at all times.
- Everett Dirksen
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
- Groucho Marx
You can lead a man to Congress,
but you can't make him think.
- Milton Berle
There are two times when a man doesn't understand a woman -
before marriage and after marriage.
- Anonymous
You never really know a man until you have divorced him.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
A man is a fool if he drinks before he reaches the age of 50,
and a fool if he doesn't afterward.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
Whenever I date a guy, I think,
"Is this the man I want my children
to spend their weekends with?"
- Rita Rudner
Men always want to be a woman's first love -
women like to be a man's last romance.
- Oscar Wilde
Getting divorced just because you don't love a man
is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous
Give a man one rabbit, and he will eat for a day;
give a man two rabbits, and he will
feed his family and his neighbors
and return you 64,768 rabbits in change.
- Anonymous
The man who reads nothing at all
is better educated than the man who reads nothing but newspapers.
- Thomas Jefferson
Morality which depends upon the helplessness
of a man or woman has not much to recommend it.
Morality is rooted in the purity of our hearts.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
The power of man has grown in every sphere, except over himself.
- Winston Churchill
Give the right man two fishes and some bread,
and he will feed the world;
give the wrong man two fishes and some bread
and he will invent the fast-food fish sandwich.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway
is usually a poor judge of distance.
- Laurence J. Peter
Man can hardly even recognize the devils of his own creation.
- Albert Schweitzer
Man's role is uncertain, undefined, and perhaps unnecessary.
- Margaret Mead
A man is usually more careful of his money
than he is of his principles.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
You can always tell when a man's well informed.
His views are pretty much like your own.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
God must love the common man, he made so many of them.
- Abraham Lincoln
A clever man commits no minor blunders.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
The man of science is a poor philosopher.
- Albert Einstein
A man can't be too careful in the choice of enemies.
- Oscar Wilde
Man is a clever animal who behaves like an imbecile.
- Albert Schweitzer
A benevolent man should allow a few faults in himself,
to keep his friends in countenance.
- Benjamin Franklin
The man who can smile when things go wrong
has thought of someone else he can blame it on.
- Robert Bloch
If I knew for a certainty that a man was coming to my house
with the conscious design of doing me good,
I should run for my life.
- Henry David Thoreau
Every man prefers belief to the exercise of judgment.
- Lucius Annaeus Seneca
An intellectual is a man
who takes more words than necessary
to tell more than he knows.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
I don't advise a haircut, man.
All hairdressers are in the employment of the government.
Hairs are your aerials.
They pick up signals from the cosmos,
and transmit them directly into the brain.
This is the reason bald-headed men are uptight.
- the movie Withnail & I
When I hear a man preach,
I like to see him act as if he were fighting bees.
- Abraham Lincoln
Clothes make the man.
Naked people have little or no influence on society.
- Mark Twain
I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man,
and I hate people like that!
- Tom Lehrer
Adventure is not outside man; it is within.
- George Eliot
Never give a sword to a man who can't dance.
- Confucius
A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers,
looks around for a coffin.
- H. L. Mencken
Blessed is the man who, having nothing to say,
abstains from giving us wordy evidence of the fact.
- George Eliot
One man's "magic" is another man's engineering.
"Supernatural" is a null word.
- Robert A. Heinlein
The man who does not read good books
has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
- Mark Twain
Beauty is the bait which with delight
allures man to enlarge his kind.
- Socrates
An excellent man;
he has no enemies;
and none of his friends like him.
- Oscar Wilde
If it keeps up, man will atrophy
all his limbs but the push-button finger.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
A cynic is a man who knows the price of everything
and the value of nothing.
- Oscar Wilde
Man is a credulous animal, and must believe something;
in the absence of good grounds for belief,
he will be satisfied with bad ones.
- Bertrand Russell
The savage in man is never quite eradicated.
- Henry David Thoreau
I will far rather see the race of man extinct
than that we should become less than beasts
by making the noblest of God's creation,
woman, the object of our lust.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
I know that God made the whole world in 4004 BC.
I know because my preacher told me. He's a good man.
He's even saving up all the money we give him
to go to bible college someday.
- Anonymous Humor
Many a man owes his success to his first wife
and his second wife to his success.
- Jim Backus
Every man thinks God is on his side.
- Jean Anouilh
I like a man who grins when he fights.
- Winston Churchill
Never stir up litigation.
A worse man can scarcely be found than one who does this.
- Abraham Lincoln
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.