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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Bundle Quotes
Funny Quotes about Bundle

Let these funny Bundle Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

A man wrapped up in himself makes a very small bundle.
- Benjamin Franklin

I'm not a genius.
I'm just a tremendous bundle of experience.
- R. Buckminster Fuller

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.
- W. C. Fields PHOTO

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand


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Men always want to be a woman's first love -
women like to be a man's last romance.
- Oscar Wilde

Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West

I am a man of fixed and unbending principles,
the first of which is to be flexible at all times.
- Everett Dirksen


 

You can lead a man to Congress,
but you can't make him think.
- Milton Berle

Whenever I date a guy, I think,
"Is this the man I want my children
to spend their weekends with?"
- Rita Rudner

A man is a fool if he drinks before he reaches the age of 50,
and a fool if he doesn't afterward.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

Afraid? Me? A man who's licked
his weight in wild caterpillars?
Afraid? You bet I'm afraid!
- Groucho Marx

A man is incomplete until he is married.
After that, he is finished.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

A man's friendships are, like his will,
invalidated by marriage -
but they are also no less invalidated
by the marriage of his friends.
- Samuel Butler

In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland

Don't marry a man to reform him -
that's what reform schools are for.
- Mae West

A man likes his wife to be
just clever enough to appreciate his cleverness,
and just stupid enough to admire it.
- Israel Zangwill

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous

Getting divorced just because you don't love a man
is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

There are two times when a man doesn't understand a woman -
before marriage and after marriage.
- Anonymous

Give a man one rabbit, and he will eat for a day;
give a man two rabbits, and he will
feed his family and his neighbors
and return you 64,768 rabbits in change.
- Anonymous

I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln

You never really know a man until you have divorced him.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
- Groucho Marx

No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous

He's the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of.
- Mae West

Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy,
the first question I ask myself is:
is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?
- Rita Rudner

One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.
- Ogden Nash

One man's theology is another man's belly laugh.
- Robert A. Heinlein

One cannot have everything the way he would like it.
A man has no business to be depressed by a disappointment,
anyway; he ought to make up his mind to get even.
- Mark Twain

Barf: I'm a mog: half man, half dog. I'm my own best friend!
- the movie Spaceballs (1987)

A benevolent man should allow a few faults in himself,
to keep his friends in countenance.
- Benjamin Franklin

I know that God made the whole world in 4004 BC.
I know because my preacher told me. He's a good man.
He's even saving up all the money we give him
to go to bible college someday.
- Anonymous Humor

I choose my friends for their good looks,
my acquaintances for their good characters,
and my enemies for their intellects.
A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
- Oscar Wilde

A man is usually more careful of his money
than he is of his principles.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Clothes make the man.
Naked people have little or no influence on society.
- Mark Twain

I want to be the white man's brother, not his brother-in-law.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Blessed is the man who, having nothing to say,
abstains from giving us wordy evidence of the fact.
- George Eliot

If it keeps up, man will atrophy
all his limbs but the push-button finger.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

Man is a clever animal who behaves like an imbecile.
- Albert Schweitzer

The power of man has grown in every sphere, except over himself.
- Winston Churchill

Morality which depends upon the helplessness
of a man or woman has not much to recommend it.
Morality is rooted in the purity of our hearts.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

If I knew for a certainty that a man was coming to my house
with the conscious design of doing me good,
I should run for my life.
- Henry David Thoreau

Every man prefers belief to the exercise of judgment.
- Lucius Annaeus Seneca

If you can not answer a man's argument,
all is not lost; you can still call him vile names.
- Elbert Hubbard

A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother
why the bride changed her mind.
What do you mean? responded her mother.
Well, she went down the aisle with one man,
and came back with another.
- Anonymous

Confused Memories of Childhood:
Hate to my father, cruel hate,
confused with love - a mix not great.
The man I love - the man I hate;
the man I want to emulate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

One man's "magic" is another man's engineering.
"Supernatural" is a null word.
- Robert A. Heinlein

A conservative is a man who is
too cowardly to fight and too fat to run.
- Elbert Hubbard

It appears to be a law that you cannot have
a deep sympathy with both man and nature.
- Henry David Thoreau

Every man thinks God is on his side.
- Jean Anouilh

The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway
is usually a poor judge of distance.
- Laurence J. Peter

The man who does not read good books
has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
- Mark Twain

An excellent man;
he has no enemies;
and none of his friends like him.
- Oscar Wilde

An intellectual is a man
who takes more words than necessary
to tell more than he knows.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

Stay hopeless and confused. Keep polishing those skills.
- the movie When a Man Loves a Woman (1994)

We are born believing.
A man bears beliefs as a tree bears apples.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

I like a man who grins when he fights.
- Winston Churchill

The man who reads nothing at all
is better educated than the man who reads nothing but newspapers.
- Thomas Jefferson

I would rather trust a woman's instinct than a man's reason.
- Stanley Baldwin

Never give a sword to a man who can't dance.
- Confucius

When I hear a man preach,
I like to see him act as if he were fighting bees.
- Abraham Lincoln

Never stir up litigation.
A worse man can scarcely be found than one who does this.
- Abraham Lincoln

Books serve to show a man
that those original thoughts of his
aren't very new at all.
- Abraham Lincoln

A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers,
looks around for a coffin.
- H. L. Mencken

You can always tell when a man's well informed.
His views are pretty much like your own.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

The man of science is a poor philosopher.
- Albert Einstein

A cynic is a man who knows the price of everything
and the value of nothing.
- Oscar Wilde

Show me a sane man, and I will cure him for you.
- Carl Jung

Mr. Attlee is a very modest man.
Indeed he has a lot to be modest about.
- Winston Churchill

Man's nature is not essentially evil.
Brute nature has been known to
yield to the influence of love.
You must never despair of human nature.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man,
and I hate people like that!
- Tom Lehrer


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.