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Benjamin Franklin Quotes
Funny Quotes by Benjamin Franklin

Let these funny Benjamin Franklin Quotes lighten up your life. And check out the humorous quotes of many more funny authors in my large collection.

A man wrapped up in himself makes a very small bundle.
- Benjamin Franklin

One good Husband is worth two good Wives;
for the scarcer things are, the more they're valued.
- Benjamin Franklin

Experience keeps a dear school,
but fools will learn in no other.
- Benjamin Franklin

Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
- Benjamin Franklin


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Silence is not always a Sign of Wisdom,
but Babbling is ever a folly.
- Benjamin Franklin

Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards.
- Benjamin Franklin

Guests, like fish, begin to smell after three days.
- Benjamin Franklin


 

People who are wrapped up in themselves make small packages.
- Benjamin Franklin

A benevolent man should allow a few faults in himself,
to keep his friends in countenance.
- Benjamin Franklin

Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain,
and most fools do.
- Benjamin Franklin PHOTO

Doing an injury puts you below your enemy;
revenging one make you but even with him;
forgiving it sets you above him.
- Benjamin Franklin [attributed]

Make yourself sheep and the wolves will eat you.
- Benjamin Franklin

Money has never made man happy, nor will it,
there is nothing in its nature to produce happiness.
The more of it one has the more one wants.
- Benjamin Franklin

A good example is the best sermon.
- Benjamin Franklin

He that would fish, must venture his bait.
- Benjamin Franklin

Search others for their virtues, thyself for thy vices.
- Benjamin Franklin

Energy and persistence conquer all things.
- Benjamin Franklin

For want of a nail the shoe was lost;
for want of a shoe the horse was lost;
and for want of a horse the rider was lost.
- Benjamin Franklin

They who can give up essential liberty
to obtain a little temporary safety
deserve neither liberty nor safety.
- Benjamin Franklin

Necessity never made a good bargain.
- Benjamin Franklin

A house is not a home unless it
contains food and fire
for the mind as well as the body.
- Benjamin Franklin

I am the lord of myself, accountable to none.
- Benjamin Franklin

Well done is better than well said.
- Benjamin Franklin

It is a great confidence in a friend
to tell him your faults;
greater to tell him his.
- Benjamin Franklin

Hide not your talents,
they for use were made.
What's a sundial in the shade?
- Benjamin Franklin

Half a truth is often a great lie.
- Benjamin Franklin

Never leave that till tomorrow which you can do today.
- Benjamin Franklin

A penny saved is a penny earned.
- Benjamin Franklin [attributed]

Never has there been a good war or a bad peace.
- Benjamin Franklin

If a man empties his purse into his head,
no man can take it away from him.
An investment in knowledge always pays the best interest.
- Benjamin Franklin

He that hath a Trade, hath an Estate.
- Benjamin Franklin

An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.
- Benjamin Franklin

We must all hang together,
or assuredly we shall all hang separately.
- Benjamin Franklin

Dost thou love life? Then do not squander time,
for that is the stuff that life is made of.
- Benjamin Franklin

It is easier to prevent bad habits than to break them.
- Benjamin Franklin

When the well's dry, we know the worth of water.
- Benjamin Franklin

We must, indeed, all hang together or,
most assuredly, we shall all hang separately.
- Benjamin Franklin

Little strokes,
Fell great oaks.
- Benjamin Franklin

Fear not death; for the sooner we die,
the longer shall we be immortal.
- Benjamin Franklin

Early to bed and early to rise,
makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise.
- Benjamin Franklin

Be slow in choosing a friend, slower in changing.
- Benjamin Franklin

A little neglect may breed great mischief.
- Benjamin Franklin

Do not anticipate trouble,
or worry about what may never happen.
Keep in the sunlight.
- Benjamin Franklin

Eat to live, and not live to eat.
- Benjamin Franklin

Does thou love life? Then do not squander time;
for that's the stuff life is made of.
- Benjamin Franklin

At twenty years of age the will reigns;
at thirty, the wit;
and at forty, the judgment.
- Benjamin Franklin

What you seem to be, be really.
- Benjamin Franklin

Happiness depends more on the inward disposition of mind,
than on outward circumstances.
- Benjamin Franklin

There was never a good war or a bad peace.
- Benjamin Franklin

Love your Neighbor; yet don't pull down your Hedge.
- Benjamin Franklin

Absence sharpens love, presence strengthens it.
- Benjamin Franklin

The way to see by faith is to shut the eye of reason.
- Benjamin Franklin [attributed]

Hunger is the best pickle.
- Benjamin Franklin

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.
- W. C. Fields

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand

A man is incomplete until he is married.
After that, he is finished.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous

Afraid? Me? A man who's licked
his weight in wild caterpillars?
Afraid? You bet I'm afraid!
- Groucho Marx

Getting divorced just because you don't love a man
is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

Give a man one rabbit, and he will eat for a day;
give a man two rabbits, and he will
feed his family and his neighbors
and return you 64,768 rabbits in change.
- Anonymous

There are two times when a man doesn't understand a woman -
before marriage and after marriage.
- Anonymous

A man likes his wife to be
just clever enough to appreciate his cleverness,
and just stupid enough to admire it.
- Israel Zangwill

Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
- Groucho Marx

I am a man of fixed and unbending principles,
the first of which is to be flexible at all times.
- Everett Dirksen

One cannot have everything the way he would like it.
A man has no business to be depressed by a disappointment,
anyway; he ought to make up his mind to get even.
- Mark Twain

Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West

You never really know a man until you have divorced him.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

A man's friendships are, like his will,
invalidated by marriage -
but they are also no less invalidated
by the marriage of his friends.
- Samuel Butler

A man is a fool if he drinks before he reaches the age of 50,
and a fool if he doesn't afterward.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

Don't marry a man to reform him -
that's what reform schools are for.
- Mae West


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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