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Let these funny Track Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Even if you're on the right track,
you'll get run over if you just sit there.
- Will Rogers
When you follow your bliss, you put yourself on a kind of track
that has been there all the while waiting for you,
and the life you ought to be living is the one you are living.
When you can see that, you begin to meet people
who are in the field of your bliss,
and they open the doors to you.
I say, follow your bliss and don't be afraid,
and doors will open where you didn't know they were going to be.
If you follow your bliss,
doors will open for you that wouldn't have opened for anyone else.
- Joseph Campbell
To the Master's honor all must turn,
each in its track, without a sound,
forever tracing Newton's ground.
- Albert Einstein
Who never walks save where he sees
men's tracks, makes no discoveries.
- J. G. Holland
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We will be known forever by the tracks we leave.
- American Indian Proverb
In business or in life, don't follow the wagon tracks too closely.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
No one ever found wisdom without also being a fool.
Writers, alas, have to be fools in public,
while the rest of the human race can cover its tracks.
- Erica Jong
Neither a wise man nor a brave man lies down
on the tracks of history
to wait for the train of the future to run over him.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
It is wonderful how much time good people spend fighting the devil.
If they would only expend the same
amount of energy loving their fellow men,
the devil would die in his own tracks of ennui.
- Helen Keller
The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde
Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz
I read that you should never go out with someone
if you can think of three reasons why you shouldn't.
- the movie Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason (2004)
You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly,
but I bet you ain't never seen a DONKEY fly!
- the movie Shrek (2001)
Never call an accountant a credit to his profession;
a good accountant is a debit to his profession.
- Charles Lyell
You never really know a man until you have divorced him.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
We have a great life here in Alaska,
and we're never going back to America again!
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)
And you just gotta remember, Sparky -
no matter what they tell you - you can NEVER have too much sugar.
- the movie Michael (1996)
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
- Phyllis Diller
Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire
Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?
- Edgar Bergen
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
- Winston Churchill
My father always told me that
all businessmen were sons of bitches,
but I never believed it till now.
- John F. Kennedy
TEAMWORK...means never having to take all the blame yourself.
- Anonymous
One should always be in love.
That is the reason one should never marry.
- Oscar Wilde
The way for a young man to rise is
to improve himself in every way he can,
never suspecting that anybody wishes to hinder him.
- Abraham Lincoln
Never let the fear of striking out get in your way.
- Babe Ruth
Some things will never seem adequate
no matter how hard we try.
- from the movie White Man's Burden
Eating words has never given me indigestion.
- Winston Churchill
Do not take life too seriously.
You will never get out of it alive.
- Elbert Hubbard
I never considered a difference of opinion
in politics, in religion, in philosophy,
as cause for withdrawing from a friend.
- Thomas Jefferson
I never accepted the idea
that I had to be guided by
some pattern or blueprint.
- Little Richard
People who want to share their religious views with you
almost never want you to share yours with them.
- Dave Barry
A person who never made a mistake
never tried anything new.
- Albert Einstein
The savage in man is never quite eradicated.
- Henry David Thoreau
It's never too late -
never too late to start over,
never too late to be happy.
- Jane Fonda
One can never consent to creep when one feels the impulse to soar.
- Helen Keller
You are Never Too Old to Give or Get Gold Stars.
Show Your Honest Appreciation - Today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Things have never been more like the way they are today in history.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
Until you've lost your reputation,
you never realize what a burden it was.
- Margaret Mitchell
Two things a man should never be angry at:
what he can help,
and what he cannot help.
- Thomas Fuller
One should never trust a woman who tells her real age.
If she tells that, she'll tell anything.
- Oscar Wilde
Never give a sword to a man who can't dance.
- Confucius
Man's nature is not essentially evil.
Brute nature has been known to
yield to the influence of love.
You must never despair of human nature.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Which form of proverb do you prefer
Better late than never, or Better never than late?
- Lewis Carroll
I have great hopes that we shall love each other all our lives
as much as if we had never married at all.
- Lord Byron
Conscience is a mother-in-law whose visit never ends.
- H. L. Mencken
One should never know too precisely
whom one has married
- Friedrich Nietzsche
I would never want to be a member of a group
whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
- George Carlin
Never try to teach a pig to sing.
It wastes your time, and it annoys the pig.
- Mark Twain
The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.
- Oscar Wilde
Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves
for they shall never cease to be amused.
- Anonymous
I never make stupid mistakes.
Only very, very clever ones.
- John Peel
I was wise enough to never grow up
while fooling most people into believing I had.
- Margaret Mead
Never put off till tomorrow
what you can do the day after tomorrow.
- Mark Twain
Never stir up litigation.
A worse man can scarcely be found than one who does this.
- Abraham Lincoln
You never can tell with bees.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
Stay Happy, never let anyone get your goat.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Never trust spiritual leader who doesn't dance.
- Miyagi: character in the movie The Next Karate Kid
I always pass on good advice.
It is the only thing to do with it.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde
Life is never fair, and perhaps it is a good thing
for most of us that it is not.
- Oscar Wilde
Anyone who knows history, particularly
the history of Europe, will, I think,
recognize that the domination
of education or of government
by any one particular religious faith
is never a happy arrangement for the people.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
She drove me to drink.
That's the one thing I'm indebted to her for.
- the movie Never Give a Sucker an Even Break
You are never too old to set another goal
or to dream a new dream.
- C. S. Lewis
Our Joy comes from living our own lives simply -
never from demanding that others live simply -
or from ever making any demands whatsoever upon others.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Thousands of candles can be lit from a single candle,
and the life of the candle will not be shortened.
Happiness never decreases by being shared.
- The Buddha
Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates.
You never know what you're gonna get.
- the movie Forrest Gump
Hate is never conquered by hate,
Hate is only conquered by love.
- The Buddha
I make it a policy to try never to
make a complete idiot of myself twice in the same way.
After all, there's always all kinds of new ways
to make a complete idiot of myself.
Why repeat the old ones?
- Margot Dalton
People will forget what you said,
people will forget what you did,
but people will never forget
how you made them feel.
- Maya Angelou
Never interrupt someone doing what you said couldn't be done.
- Amelia Earhart
There are only two or three human stories,
and they go on repeating themselves as fiercely
as if they had never happened before.
- Willa Cather
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.