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Funny Successful Quotes
Funny Quotes about Successful

Let these funny Successful Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

The attempt to combine wisdom and power
has only rarely been successful and then only for a short while.
- Albert Einstein

The formula for achieving a successful relationship is simple:
you should treat all disasters as if they were trivialities
but never treat a triviality as if it were a disaster.
- Quentin Crisp

Success seems to be connected with action.
Successful people keep moving.
They make mistakes, but they don't quit.
- Conrad Hilton

Integrity is the essence of everything successful.
- R. Buckminster Fuller


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No man has a good enough memory to be a successful liar.
- Abraham Lincoln

Successful people ask better questions,
and as a result, they get better answers.
- Tony Robbins

Without a humble but reasonable
confidence in your own powers
you cannot be successful or happy.
- Norman Vincent Peale


 

Achievement seems to be connected with action.
Successful men and women keep moving.
They make mistakes, but they don't quit.
- Conrad Hilton

The most successful war seldom pays for its losses.
- Thomas Jefferson

The way to develop self-confidence
is to do the thing you fear
and get a record of successful experiences behind you.
- William Jennings Bryan

Believe in yourself. Have faith in your abilities.
Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers
you cannot be successful or happy.
- Norman Vincent Peale

The choice is to work alone to be a little
more successful than the next person,
or to work together for the great betterment of humanity.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The man who is successful is the man who is useful.
- Bourke Cockran

Life is a constant opponent,
and an overpowering adversary if attacked directly.
The successful and happy ones dance lightly with life -
a parry here, a feint there - always engaged,
but never in the direct line of life's heaviest blows.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Successful people are simply those with successful habits.
- Brian Tracy

There is no person in this room whose basic rights
are not involved in any successful defiance
to the carrying out of court orders.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

Only he is successful in his business who makes that pursuit
which affords him the highest pleasure sustain him.
- Henry David Thoreau

Friends love misery, in fact.
Sometimes, especially if we are too lucky
or too successful or too pretty,
our misery is the only thing that endears us to our friends.
- Erica Jong

The difference between a successful person and others
is not a lack of strength,
not a lack of knowledge,
but rather a lack of will.
- Vince Lombardi

The most successful people in life
are generally those who have the best information.
- Benjamin Disraeli

The successful and happy ones dance lightly with life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Success is not the key to happiness.
Happiness is the key to success.
If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.
- Albert Schweitzer

There is no point at which you can say,
"Well, I'm successful now.
I might as well take a nap."
- Carrie Fisher

I believe that anyone can conquer fear
by doing the things he fears to do,
provided he keeps doing them until he gets
a record of successful experience behind him.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

A successful marriage requires falling in love many times,
always with the same person.
- Germaine Greer

Action is a great restorer and builder of confidence.
Inaction is not only the result, but the cause, of fear.
Perhaps the action you take will be successful;
perhaps different action or adjustments will have to follow.
But any action is better than no action at all.
- Norman Vincent Peale

All successful people men and women are big dreamers.
They imagine what their future could be,
ideal in every respect,
and then they work every day toward
their distant vision,
that goal or purpose.
- Brian Tracy

"Mother Teresa Prayer"
People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered;
... Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you
of selfish, ulterior motives;
... Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some
false friends and some true enemies;
... Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;
... Be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;
... Build anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous;
... Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;
... Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough;
... Give the world the best you've got anyway.
You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God;
It was never between you and them anyway.
We can do no great things - only small things with great love.
- although commonly attributed to Mother Teresa,
who kept a copy of this prayer on
the wall of her Calcutta orphanage,
this prayer was actually written by Kent Keith.

A working definition of Honor is,
"respect or esteem that has been earned."
Contemplate that for a moment.
It would be very special to earn the respect and esteem
of our family, our friends, our co-workers, our community, wouldn't it?
If anything, it is of even more moment to honor yourself.
Those who are successful and happy earn their own
self-respect and self-esteem.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

However beautiful the strategy,
you should occasionally look at the results.
- Winston Churchill

The road to success is always under construction.
- Anonymous

If you don't know where you are going,
you might wind up someplace else.
- Yogi Berra

One cannot have everything the way he would like it.
A man has no business to be depressed by a disappointment,
anyway; he ought to make up his mind to get even.
- Mark Twain

Winners Dream Big Dreams.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Success consists of going from failure to failure
without loss of enthusiasm.
- Winston Churchill
(also quoted as: "Courage is going from failure to failure
without losing enthusiasm."

The worst part of success is to try to find
someone who is happy for you.
- Bette Midler

Where there's a will, there's a way.
- old English proverb

A true friend is one who
overlooks your failures
and tolerates your success.
- Doug Larson

In life you are given two ends;
one to think with and the other to sit on.
Your success in life depends on which end you use most.
Heads you win, tails you lose.
- Conrad Burns

If you don't know where you're going,
any road will take you there.
- Lewis Carroll
(Alice in Wonderland)

Many a man owes his success to his first wife
and his second wife to his success.
- Jim Backus

"Hurry up" ranks right up there with "you need to"
as a destroyer of our humanity.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence;
then success is sure.
- Mark Twain

Those who believe they can do something
and those who believe they can't
are both right.
- Henry Ford

Whenever I find the key to success,
someone changes the lock.
- Anonymous

Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.
- Robert F. Kennedy

The Main Thing is to Keep
The Main Thing The Main Thing.
- Stephen Covey

Success is failure recycled.
Life is death reborn.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It is often easier to ask for forgiveness
than to ask for permission.
- Grace Hopper

A great secret of success is to go through life
as a man who never gets used up.
- Albert Schweitzer

If one advances confidently
in the direction of his dreams,
and endeavors to live
the life which he has imagined,
he will meet with success
unexpected in common hours.
- Henry David Thoreau

A man is a success if he gets up in
the morning and gets to bed at night,
and in between he does what he wants to do.
- Bob Dylan

The key to success, and to happiness,
is being fully engaged in life -
leading yourself with inspiration and committed action -
setting your own fine and honorable example.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

No man is a failure who enjoys life.
- William Feather

The secret of success is making your vocation your vacation.
- Mark Twain

The problems of victory are more agreeable
than those of defeat,
but they are no less difficult.
- Winston Churchill

My definition of success is to live your life in a way
that causes you to feel a ton of pleasure and very little pain -
and because of your lifestyle, have the people around you feel
a lot more pleasure than they do pain.
- Tony Robbins

There are no secrets to success.
It is the result of preparation,
hard work, and learning from failure.
- Colin Powell

Many of life's failures are people who did not realize
how close they were to success when they gave up.
- Thomas Edison

Success comes from knowing that
you did your best to become the best
that you are capable of becoming.
- John Wooden

Bringing a childlike wonder
and a beginner's mind to life
maximizes both success and joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

One important key to success is self-confidence.
An important key to self-confidence is preparation.
- Arthur Ashe

The only roadblock to success is limited thinking.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If you love what you are doing, you ARE a success.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The price of success is hard work,
dedication to the job at hand,
and the determination that whether we win or lose,
we have applied the best of ourselves to the task at hand.
- Vince Lombardi

The secret of success is constancy to purpose.
- Benjamin Disraeli

The path to success is to take massive, determined action.
- Tony Robbins

The boldness of endurance is
the underline to almost every success.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

To laugh often and much;
to win the respect of intelligent people
and the affection of children,
to leave the world a better place,
to know even one life has breathed easier
because you have lived,
this is to have succeeded.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Some people dream of success
while others wake up and work hard at it.
- Anonymous

Most people give up just when
they're about to achieve success.
They quit on the one yard line.
They give up at the last minute of the game,
one foot from a winning touch down.
- Ross Perot


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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