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Funny Success Quotes
Funny Quotes about Success

Let these funny Success Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

However beautiful the strategy,
you should occasionally look at the results.
- Winston Churchill

If you don't know where you are going,
you might wind up someplace else.
- Yogi Berra

One cannot have everything the way he would like it.
A man has no business to be depressed by a disappointment,
anyway; he ought to make up his mind to get even.
- Mark Twain

The road to success is always under construction.
- Anonymous


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Where there's a will, there's a way.
- old English proverb

The worst part of success is to try to find
someone who is happy for you.
- Bette Midler

Winners Dream Big Dreams.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


 

Success consists of going from failure to failure
without loss of enthusiasm.
- Winston Churchill
(also quoted as: "Courage is going from failure to failure
without losing enthusiasm."

All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence;
then success is sure.
- Mark Twain

Many a man owes his success to his first wife
and his second wife to his success.
- Jim Backus

If you don't know where you're going,
any road will take you there.
- Lewis Carroll
(Alice in Wonderland)

In life you are given two ends;
one to think with and the other to sit on.
Your success in life depends on which end you use most.
Heads you win, tails you lose.
- Conrad Burns

The Main Thing is to Keep
The Main Thing The Main Thing.
- Stephen Covey

"Hurry up" ranks right up there with "you need to"
as a destroyer of our humanity.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.
- Robert F. Kennedy

Whenever I find the key to success,
someone changes the lock.
- Anonymous

A true friend is one who
overlooks your failures
and tolerates your success.
- Doug Larson

Those who believe they can do something
and those who believe they can't
are both right.
- Henry Ford

Success comes from knowing that
you did your best to become the best
that you are capable of becoming.
- John Wooden

No man is a failure who enjoys life.
- William Feather

Your success and happiness lies in you.
Resolve to keep happy, and your joy and you
shall form an invincible host against difficulties.
- Helen Keller

The secret of success in life is for a man to be ready
for his opportunity when it comes.
- Benjamin Disraeli

If you love what you are doing, you ARE a success.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The secret of success is constancy to purpose.
- Benjamin Disraeli

Some people dream of success
while others wake up and work hard at it.
- Anonymous

Your success will shine as a light of hope
and inspire numbers you cannot total.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

My definition of success is to live your life in a way
that causes you to feel a ton of pleasure and very little pain -
and because of your lifestyle, have the people around you feel
a lot more pleasure than they do pain.
- Tony Robbins

Success is failure recycled.
Life is death reborn.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The secret of success is making your vocation your vacation.
- Mark Twain

Bringing a childlike wonder
and a beginner's mind to life
maximizes both success and joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Many of life's failures are people who did not realize
how close they were to success when they gave up.
- Thomas Edison

The path to success is to take massive, determined action.
- Tony Robbins

The only roadblock to success is limited thinking.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

A great secret of success is to go through life
as a man who never gets used up.
- Albert Schweitzer

You're standing on the threshold of success.
Don't look down, it'll make you dizzy.
- the character Timothy Q. Mouse in the Walt Disney movie Dumbo

One important key to success is self-confidence.
An important key to self-confidence is preparation.
- Arthur Ashe

The key to success, and to happiness,
is being fully engaged in life -
leading yourself with inspiration and committed action -
setting your own fine and honorable example.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It is often easier to ask for forgiveness
than to ask for permission.
- Grace Hopper

Most people give up just when
they're about to achieve success.
They quit on the one yard line.
They give up at the last minute of the game,
one foot from a winning touch down.
- Ross Perot

A person acting from a motivation
of contribution and service
rises to such a level of moral authority
that worldly success is a natural result.
- Marianne Williamson

There are no secrets to success.
It is the result of preparation,
hard work, and learning from failure.
- Colin Powell

To laugh often and much;
to win the respect of intelligent people
and the affection of children,
to leave the world a better place,
to know even one life has breathed easier
because you have lived,
this is to have succeeded.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

If one advances confidently
in the direction of his dreams,
and endeavors to live
the life which he has imagined,
he will meet with success
unexpected in common hours.
- Henry David Thoreau

Not every difficult and dangerous thing
is suitable for training,
but only that which is conducive to success
in achieving the object of our effort.
- Epictetus

A man is a success if he gets up in
the morning and gets to bed at night,
and in between he does what he wants to do.
- Bob Dylan

If there is any one secret of success,
it lies in the ability to get
the other person's point of view
and see things from that person's angle
as well as from your own.
- Henry Ford

Whatever your life's work is, do it well.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

The price of success is hard work,
dedication to the job at hand,
and the determination that whether we win or lose,
we have applied the best of ourselves to the task at hand.
- Vince Lombardi

The size of your success is measured by
the strength of your desire;
the size of your dream;
and how you handle disappointment along the way.
- Robert Kiyosaki

I don't know the key to success,
but the key to failure is to try to please everyone.
- Bill Cosby

The key to happiness is having dreams.
The key to success is making your dreams come true.
- Anonymous

The boldness of endurance is
the underline to almost every success.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

The problems of victory are more agreeable
than those of defeat,
but they are no less difficult.
- Winston Churchill

Nothing gives one person so much advantage over another
as to remain always cool and unruffled under all circumstances.
- Thomas Jefferson

The man who has won millions at the cost of his conscience is a failure.
- B. C. Forbes

Ninety-nine percent of the failures
come from people who have the habit of making excuses.
- George Washington Carver

Winners never quit and quitters never win.
- Vince Lombardi

The majority of men meet with failure
because of their lack of persistence
in creating new plans to take
the place of those which fail.
- Napoleon Hill

Mistakes are, after all, the foundations of truth,
and if a man does not know what a thing is,
it is at least an increase in knowledge
if he knows what it is not.
- Carl Jung

Where there is no vision, there is no hope.
- George Washington Carver

Successful people are simply those with successful habits.
- Brian Tracy

If you wish to succeed in life,
make perseverance your bosom friend,
experience your wise counselor,
caution your elder brother,
and hope your guardian genius.
- Joseph Addison

Luck is preparation meeting opportunity.
- Seneca

When the water starts boiling
it is foolish to turn off the heat.
- Nelson Mandela

Courage and perseverance have a magical talisman,
before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish into air.
- John Quincy Adams

Life grants nothing to us mortals without hard work.
- Horace

Once we doubt ourselves, success slips beyond our grasp.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The meaning of life is not simply to exist, to survive,
but to move ahead, to go up, to achieve, to conquer.
- Arnold Schwarzenegger

Winners must have two things:
definite goals and a burning desire to achieve them.
- Anonymous

When you can do the common things of life in an uncommon way,
you will command the attention of the world.
- George Washington Carver

I am a great believer in luck
and I find that the harder
I work the more I have of it.
- Thomas Jefferson


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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