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Funny Friendships Quotes
Funny Quotes about Friendships

Let these funny Friendships Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

This is my wish for you:
Comfort on difficult days,
Smiles when sadness intrudes,
Rainbows to follow the clouds,
Laughter to kiss your lips,
Sunsets to warm your heart,
Hugs when spirits sag,
Beauty for your eyes to see,
Friendships to brighten your being,
Faith so that you can believe,
Confidence for when you doubt,
Courage to know yourself,
Patience to accept the truth,
Love to complete your life.
- Anonymous

A man's friendships are, like his will,
invalidated by marriage -
but they are also no less invalidated
by the marriage of his friends.
- Samuel Butler

My father and he had one of those English friendships
which begins by avoiding the intimacies
and eventually eliminates speech altogether.
- Jorge Luis Borges

We have no enemies,
we have only friendships that we haven't yet developed
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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I do not wish to treat friendships daintily,
but with roughest courage.
When they are real, they are
not glass threads or frost-work,
but the solidest thing we know.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

If a man does not make new acquaintances
as he advances through life,
he will soon find himself alone.
A man, sir, should keep his friendships in constant repair.
- Samuel Johnson

Real friendships among men are so rare
that when they occur they are famous.
- Clarence Day


 

A man's friendships are one of the best measures of his worth.
- Charles Darwin

There is a magic in the memory of schoolboy friendships;
it softens the heart,
and even affects the nervous system
of those who have no heart.
- Benjamin Disraeli

There is nothing more dreadful than the habit of doubt.
Doubt separates people.
It is a poison that disintegrates
friendships and breaks up pleasant relations.
It is a thorn that irritates and hurts;
it is a sword that kills.
- The Buddha

One of the greatest titles we can have is "old friend."
We never appreciate how important old friends are until we are older.
The problem is we need to start our old friendships when we are young.
We then have to nurture and grow those friendships over our middle age
when a busy life and changing geographies
can cause us to neglect those friends.
Today is the day to invest in those people
we hope will call us "old friend" in the years to come.
- Grant Fairley

From wine what sudden friendship springs.
- John Gay

A friend is someone who will bail you out of jail.
A best friend is the one sitting next
to you saying "boy was that fun."
- The Maugles

One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends
is that three out of four murders
are committed by people who know the victim.
- George Carlin

Nothing makes the earth seem so spacious
as to have friends at a distance;
they make the latitudes and the longitudes.
- Henry David Thoreau

I have lost friends, some by death ...
others by sheer inability to cross the street.
- Virginia Woolf

A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend -
and he's a priest.
- Erma Bombeck

The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet
and steady and loyal and enduring a nature
that it will last through a whole lifetime,
if not asked to lend money.
- Mark Twain

The feeling of friendship is like that
of being comfortably filled with roast beef;
love, like being enlivened with champagne.
- Samuel Johnson

Nothing echoes like an empty mailbox.
- Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts

Nothing is more cheerful than talking
about our friends' shortcomings.
- Mason Cooley

Everyone should have at least two friends -
one to talk to and one to talk about.
- Anonymous

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
- Erma Bombeck

No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous

The worst part of success is to try to find
someone who is happy for you.
- Bette Midler

We make our friends; we make our enemies;
but God makes our next-door neighbor.
- Gilbert (G. K.) Chesterton

A true friend is one who
overlooks your failures
and tolerates your success.
- Doug Larson

I choose my friends for their good looks,
my acquaintances for their good characters,
and my enemies for their intellects.
A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
- Oscar Wilde

Do not use a hatchet to remove
a fly from your friend's forehead.
- Chinese Proverb

A loyal friend laughs at your jokes
when they're not so good,
and sympathizes with your problems
when they're not so bad.
- Arnold H. Glasgow

Most people enjoy the inferiority of their best friends.
- Lord Chesterfield

He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.
- Oscar Wilde

Nobody can be uncheered with a balloon.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

Friendship is born at that moment
when one person says to another,
"What! You too? I thought I was the only one."
- C. S. Lewis

Marriage is a sort of friendship recognized by the police.
- Anonymous

A benevolent man should allow a few faults in himself,
to keep his friends in countenance.
- Benjamin Franklin

Money can't buy friends
but it can get you a better class of enemy.
- Spike Milligan

It is far better to be alone,
than to be in bad company.
- George Washington

I'm a very loyal and unreliable friend.
- Bono

A true friend stabs you in the front.
- Oscar Wilde

I never considered a difference of opinion
in politics, in religion, in philosophy,
as cause for withdrawing from a friend.
- Thomas Jefferson

Contrary to general belief,
I do not believe that friends are necessarily
the people you like best,
they are merely the people who got there first.
- Peter Ustinov

Distance cannot matter - ours is a friendship of the heart.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

"Appeasement" is the policy of feeding your friends to a crocodile,
one at a time, in hopes that the crocodile will eat you last.
- Franklin D. Roosevelt

A lifelong friend is someone
you haven't borrowed money from yet.
- Anonymous

To the people who love you,
you are beautiful already.
This is not because they're
blind to your shortcomings
but because they so clearly see your soul.
- Victoria Moran

I have lost my seven best friends,
which is to say that God has had mercy on me
seven times without realizing it.
He lent a friendship, took it from me, and sent me another.
- Jean Cocteau

Give Honest and Sincere Appreciation.
- Dale Carnegie

Thy friendship oft has made my heart to ache;
do be my enemy - for friendship's sake.
- William Blake

True friendship is never serene.
- Marquise de Sevigne

True friendship's laws are by this rule express'd,
Welcome the coming, speed the parting guest.
- Alexander Pope

Best Friends: we're a parade - even by ourselves!
- Mary Anne Radmacher

No man stands so tall as when he stoops to help a child.
- Anonymous (often attributed to Abraham Lincoln)

A friend is someone who knows all about you,
and loves you just the same.
- Elbert Hubbard

Love me when I least deserve it,
because that's when I really need it.
- Swedish Proverb

It is the friends you can call up at 4 A.M. that matter.
- Marlene Dietrich

A happy family is but an earlier heaven.
- George Bernard Shaw

True friendship is like sound health;
the value of it is seldom known until it be lost.
- Charles Caleb Colton

A true friend is someone who
thinks that you are a good egg
even though he knows that
you are slightly cracked.
- Bernard Meltzer

Our relationships - love and friendship -
are at the core of the meaning of our lives.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

"Sometimes," said Pooh, "the smallest things take up the most room in your heart."
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

There are not many things in life
so beautiful as true friendship,
and not many things more uncommon.
- Anonymous

Business, you know, may bring money,
but friendship hardly ever does.
- Jane Austen

But what a cruel thing is war
to separate and destroy families and friends.
- Robert E. Lee

Friendship is always a sweet responsibility,
never an opportunity.
- Khalil Gibran

Love is a friendship set to music.
- Joseph Campbell

Friendship is a single soul dwelling in two bodies.
- Aristotle

Suspicion and jealousy are the death knell of any relationship.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Friendship with one's self is all important,
because without it one cannot be friends with anyone else in the world.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Friendship is certainly the finest balm
for the pangs of disappointed love.
- Jane Austen

We're born alone, we live alone, we die alone.
Only through our love and friendship can we
create the illusion for the moment that we're not alone.
- Orson Welles


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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