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Funny Truth Quotes
Funny Quotes about Truth

Let these funny Truth Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

The words of truth are always paradoxical.
- Lao Tzu

It is a truth universally acknowledged that
when one part of your life starts going okay,
another falls spectacularly to pieces.
- the movie Bridget Jones Diary

Truth is beautiful, without doubt; but so are lies.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Man will occasionally stumble over the truth,
but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.
- Winston Churchill


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If you're going to tell people the truth,
be funny or they'll kill you.
- Billy Wilder

Truth is stranger than fiction,
but that is because Fiction is obliged
to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.
- Mark Twain

Always speak the truth,
think before you speak,
and write it down afterwards.
- Lewis Carroll


 

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
- Mark Twain

My way of joking is telling the truth;
that is the funniest joke in the world.
- George Bernard Shaw

The lawyer's truth is not Truth,
but consistency or a consistent expediency.
- Henry David Thoreau

The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.
- Oscar Wilde

All people know the same truth.
Our lives consist of how we chose to distort it.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

A remark generally hurts in proportion to its truth.
- Will Rogers

Truth is a tendency.
- R. Buckminster Fuller

Bad taste is simply saying the truth before it should be said.
- Mel Brooks

Strike an average between what a woman thinks of her husband
a month before she marries him
and what she thinks of him a year afterward,
and you will have the truth about him.
- H. L. Mencken

If you are out to describe the truth,
leave elegance to the tailor.
- Albert Einstein

By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
- George Carlin

The rarest quality in an epitaph is truth.
- Henry David Thoreau

Tell the truth, or someone will tell it for you.
- Stephanie Klein

Soon we'll be out amid the cold world's strife.
Soon we'll be sliding down the razor blade of life.
But as we go our sordid sep'rate ways,
We shall ne'er forget thee, thou golden college days.
Hearts full of youth,
Hearts full of truth,
Six parts gin to one part vermouth.
- Tom Lehrer - song: Bright College Days,
album: An Evening Wasted With Tom Lehrer

The water in a vessel is sparkling;
the water in the sea is dark.
The small truth has words which are clear;
the great truth has great silence.
- Rabindranath Tagore

Man is least himself when he talks in his own person.
Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.
- Oscar Wilde

The truth. It is a beautiful and terrible thing,
and should be treated with caution.
- J. K. Rowling

Use the power of your word
in the direction of truth and love.
- don Miguel Ruiz

When a thing is funny, search it for a hidden truth.
- George Bernard Shaw

Every mind must make its choice
between truth and repose.
It cannot have both.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

We are not afraid to follow truth
wherever it may lead,
nor to tolerate any error
so long as reason is left free to combat it.
- Thomas Jefferson

A man must be both stupid and uncharitable
who believes there is no virtue or truth but on his own side.
- Joseph Addison

Intense feeling too often obscures the truth.
- Harry S. Truman

Having a personal opinion is great.
Believing that one's personal opinion is absolute truth
leads to most of the world's troubles.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The goal of education is the advancement of knowledge
and the dissemination of truth.
- John F. Kennedy

We take refuge in pride,
because we are afraid to tell the truth to ourselves.
- Kakuzo Okakura

Truth is absolute, but only to one person.
My truth is absolute to me, and your truth is absolute to you.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I am sorry to think that you do not get a man's
most effective criticism until you provoke him.
Severe truth is expressed with some bitterness.
- Henry David Thoreau

Our actions are constrained by fear of reprisal,
but our dreams reveal our true character.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

When you are sorrowful, look again in your heart,
and you shall see that in truth
you are weeping for that which has been your delight.
- Khalil Gibran

Knowledge rests not upon truth alone, but upon error also.
- Carl Jung

There are trivial truths and there are great truths.
The opposite of a trivial truth is plainly false.
The opposite of a great truth is also true.
- Niels Bohr

There are two mistakes one can make along the road to truth
- not going all the way and not starting.
- The Buddha

Everything deep is also simple
and can be reproduced simply
as long as its reference
to the whole truth is maintained.
But what matters is not what is witty
but what is true.
- Albert Schweitzer

The problem with making assumptions
is that we believe they are the truth
- don Miguel Ruiz

Love is like the truth,
sometimes it prevails,
sometimes it hurts.
- Victor M. Garcia Jr.

In a controversy, the instant we feel anger
we have already ceased striving for the truth,
and have begun striving for ourselves.
- The Buddha

Losing an illusion makes you wiser than finding a truth.
- Ludwig Boerne

Dispassionate objectivity is itself a passion,
for the real and for the truth.
- Abraham Maslow

The search for truth is more precious than its possession.
- Albert Einstein

If you have found your truth within yourself
there is nothing more in this whole existence to find.
- Osho

The false can never grow into truth by growing in power.
- Rabindranath Tagore

There's a world of difference between truth and facts.
Facts can obscure truth.
- Maya Angelou

Truth has no special time of its own.
Its hour is now - always.
- Albert Schweitzer

ANYONE may become a revealer of Truth
who lives in close contact with the indwelling God.
- Ernest Holmes

Men have always detested women's gossip
because they suspect the truth:
their measurements are being taken and compared.
- Erica Jong

God is, even though the whole world deny him.
Truth stands, even if there be no public support.
It is self-sustained.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

The truth is more important than the facts.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

The truth of the matter is that
you always know the right thing to do.
The hard part is doing it.
- Norman Schwarzkoff

It's essential to tell the truth at all times.
This will reduce life's pain.
Lying distorts reality.
All forms of distorted thinking must be corrected.
- John Bradshaw

With manners comes insincerity.
Truth is sometimes difficult.
- Bono

Non-violence and truth are inseparable and presuppose one another.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

The pursuit of truth does not permit violence on one's opponent.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Half a truth is often a great lie.
- Benjamin Franklin

Facts are many, but the truth is one.
- Rabindranath Tagore

Beyond a doubt, truth bears the same relation
to falsehood as light to darkness.
- Leonardo da Vinci

He who knows nothing is closer to the truth
than he whose mind is filled with falsehoods and errors.
- Thomas Jefferson

We tell the real truth of our life
by the stories we repeatedly tell.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

We occasionally stumble over the truth
but most of us pick ourselves up and
hurry off as if nothing had happened.
- Winston Churchill

There are only two mistakes one can make along the road to truth;
not going all the way, and not starting.
- The Buddha

In wartime, truth is so precious that she
should always be attended by a bodyguard of lies.
- Winston Churchill

I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love
will have the final word in reality.
That is why right, temporarily defeated,
is stronger than evil triumphant.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

About most subjects, there is not "The Truth;"
there is merely one's personal truth.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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