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Let these funny Discussion Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
A discussion of philosophy is like a cat chasing its tail -
it may be an amusing diversion but
it has no chance for a satisfying conclusion.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Great minds discuss ideas;
average minds discuss events;
small minds discuss people.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
We Learn...
10% of what we read,
20% of what we hear,
30% of what we see,
50% of what we see and hear,
70% of what we discuss,
80% of what we experience,
95% of what we teach others.
- William Glasser
One measure of friendship consists
not in the number of things friends can discuss,
but in the number of things they need no longer mention.
- Clifton Fadiman
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Never hold discussions with the monkey
when the organ grinder is in the room.
- Winston Churchill
The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde
Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
- Phyllis Diller
Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?
- Edgar Bergen
And you just gotta remember, Sparky -
no matter what they tell you - you can NEVER have too much sugar.
- the movie Michael (1996)
I read that you should never go out with someone
if you can think of three reasons why you shouldn't.
- the movie Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason (2004)
We have a great life here in Alaska,
and we're never going back to America again!
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
- Winston Churchill
You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly,
but I bet you ain't never seen a DONKEY fly!
- the movie Shrek (2001)
You never really know a man until you have divorced him.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
Never call an accountant a credit to his profession;
a good accountant is a debit to his profession.
- Charles Lyell
Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire
It's never too late -
never too late to start over,
never too late to be happy.
- Jane Fonda
Two things a man should never be angry at:
what he can help,
and what he cannot help.
- Thomas Fuller
One should never trust a woman who tells her real age.
If she tells that, she'll tell anything.
- Oscar Wilde
People who want to share their religious views with you
almost never want you to share yours with them.
- Dave Barry
Man's nature is not essentially evil.
Brute nature has been known to
yield to the influence of love.
You must never despair of human nature.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Life is never fair, and perhaps it is a good thing
for most of us that it is not.
- Oscar Wilde
You are Never Too Old to Give or Get Gold Stars.
Show Your Honest Appreciation - Today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Never trust spiritual leader who doesn't dance.
- Miyagi: character in the movie The Next Karate Kid
I was wise enough to never grow up
while fooling most people into believing I had.
- Margaret Mead
Never stir up litigation.
A worse man can scarcely be found than one who does this.
- Abraham Lincoln
The savage in man is never quite eradicated.
- Henry David Thoreau
Never let the fear of striking out get in your way.
- Babe Ruth
Eating words has never given me indigestion.
- Winston Churchill
Never give a sword to a man who can't dance.
- Confucius
Things have never been more like the way they are today in history.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
My father always told me that
all businessmen were sons of bitches,
but I never believed it till now.
- John F. Kennedy
I never considered a difference of opinion
in politics, in religion, in philosophy,
as cause for withdrawing from a friend.
- Thomas Jefferson
I have great hopes that we shall love each other all our lives
as much as if we had never married at all.
- Lord Byron
The way for a young man to rise is
to improve himself in every way he can,
never suspecting that anybody wishes to hinder him.
- Abraham Lincoln
Some things will never seem adequate
no matter how hard we try.
- from the movie White Man's Burden
You never can tell with bees.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
I would never want to be a member of a group
whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
- George Carlin
Which form of proverb do you prefer
Better late than never, or Better never than late?
- Lewis Carroll
One should always be in love.
That is the reason one should never marry.
- Oscar Wilde
A person who never made a mistake
never tried anything new.
- Albert Einstein
Never try to teach a pig to sing.
It wastes your time, and it annoys the pig.
- Mark Twain
I never make stupid mistakes.
Only very, very clever ones.
- John Peel
Conscience is a mother-in-law whose visit never ends.
- H. L. Mencken
Do not take life too seriously.
You will never get out of it alive.
- Elbert Hubbard
Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves
for they shall never cease to be amused.
- Anonymous
I never accepted the idea
that I had to be guided by
some pattern or blueprint.
- Little Richard
Until you've lost your reputation,
you never realize what a burden it was.
- Margaret Mitchell
The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.
- Oscar Wilde
I always pass on good advice.
It is the only thing to do with it.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde
Stay Happy, never let anyone get your goat.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
One should never know too precisely
whom one has married
- Friedrich Nietzsche
One can never consent to creep when one feels the impulse to soar.
- Helen Keller
TEAMWORK...means never having to take all the blame yourself.
- Anonymous
Never put off till tomorrow
what you can do the day after tomorrow.
- Mark Twain
She drove me to drink.
That's the one thing I'm indebted to her for.
- the movie Never Give a Sucker an Even Break
Anyone who knows history, particularly
the history of Europe, will, I think,
recognize that the domination
of education or of government
by any one particular religious faith
is never a happy arrangement for the people.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
There are only two or three human stories,
and they go on repeating themselves as fiercely
as if they had never happened before.
- Willa Cather
Our Joy comes from living our own lives simply -
never from demanding that others live simply -
or from ever making any demands whatsoever upon others.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates.
You never know what you're gonna get.
- the movie Forrest Gump
Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge:
it is those who know little, and not those who know much,
who so positively assert that this or that problem
will never be solved by science.
- Charles Darwin
People will forget what you said,
people will forget what you did,
but people will never forget
how you made them feel.
- Maya Angelou
Mind Chatter...
"I'm too fat; I'm too thin; and my hair is a fright;
And I'm never enough; and my world is not right;
I'm not smart; I'm not cute; I'm not strong; I'm a bust
I earn scorn; I earn hate; I'm no good; I disgust."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
"Rabbit's clever," said Pooh thoughtfully.
"Yes," said Piglet, "Rabbit's clever."
"And he has Brain."
"Yes," said Piglet, "Rabbit has Brain."
There was a long silence.
"I suppose," said Pooh, "that that's why he never understands anything."
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
You are never too old to set another goal
or to dream a new dream.
- C. S. Lewis
Never interrupt someone doing what you said couldn't be done.
- Amelia Earhart
Thousands of candles can be lit from a single candle,
and the life of the candle will not be shortened.
Happiness never decreases by being shared.
- The Buddha
Hate is never conquered by hate,
Hate is only conquered by love.
- The Buddha
I make it a policy to try never to
make a complete idiot of myself twice in the same way.
After all, there's always all kinds of new ways
to make a complete idiot of myself.
Why repeat the old ones?
- Margot Dalton
Farewell My Friend
It was beautiful as long as it lasted
The journey of my life.
I have no regrets whatsoever
save the pain I'll leave behind.
Those dear hearts who love and care...
And the strings pulling at the heart and soul...
The strong arms that held me up
When my own strength let me down.
At every turning of my life
I came across good friends,
Friends who stood by me,
Even when the time raced me by.
Farewell, farewell my friends
I smile and bid you goodbye.
No, shed no tears for I need them not
All I need is your smile.
If you feel sad do think of me
for that's what I'll like
when you live in the hearts
of those you love, remember then
you never die.
- Gitanjali Ghei
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.