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Let these funny Attending Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
I would rather be exposed to
the inconveniences attending too much liberty
than those attending too small a degree of it.
- Thomas Jefferson
If something is important to you,
attend to it immediately, and regularly.
If something is not really important to you,
that's great also -
just scratch it off your to-do list forever,
and never worry about it again.
Choose how you invest your time, and honor your choices.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
In wartime, truth is so precious that she
should always be attended by a bodyguard of lies.
- Winston Churchill
The greatest compliment that was ever paid me
was when one asked me what I thought,
and attended to my answer.
- Henry David Thoreau
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He didn't come out of my belly, but my God,
I've made his bones, because I've attended to every meal,
and how he sleeps,
and the fact that he swims like a fish
because I took him to the ocean.
I'm so proud of all those things.
But he is my biggest pride.
- John Lennon
It is a truth universally acknowledged that
when one part of your life starts going okay,
another falls spectacularly to pieces.
- the movie Bridget Jones Diary
Tell the truth, or someone will tell it for you.
- Stephanie Klein
My way of joking is telling the truth;
that is the funniest joke in the world.
- George Bernard Shaw
The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.
- Oscar Wilde
The lawyer's truth is not Truth,
but consistency or a consistent expediency.
- Henry David Thoreau
Always speak the truth,
think before you speak,
and write it down afterwards.
- Lewis Carroll
Truth is a tendency.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
If you're going to tell people the truth,
be funny or they'll kill you.
- Billy Wilder
By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
- George Carlin
The rarest quality in an epitaph is truth.
- Henry David Thoreau
Bad taste is simply saying the truth before it should be said.
- Mel Brooks
Truth is stranger than fiction,
but that is because Fiction is obliged
to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.
- Mark Twain
If you are out to describe the truth,
leave elegance to the tailor.
- Albert Einstein
If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
- Mark Twain
Man will occasionally stumble over the truth,
but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.
- Winston Churchill
Strike an average between what a woman thinks of her husband
a month before she marries him
and what she thinks of him a year afterward,
and you will have the truth about him.
- H. L. Mencken
Truth is beautiful, without doubt; but so are lies.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
A remark generally hurts in proportion to its truth.
- Will Rogers
All people know the same truth.
Our lives consist of how we chose to distort it.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
The truth. It is a beautiful and terrible thing,
and should be treated with caution.
- J. K. Rowling
Soon we'll be out amid the cold world's strife.
Soon we'll be sliding down the razor blade of life.
But as we go our sordid sep'rate ways,
We shall ne'er forget thee, thou golden college days.
Hearts full of youth,
Hearts full of truth,
Six parts gin to one part vermouth.
- Tom Lehrer - song: Bright College Days,
album: An Evening Wasted With Tom Lehrer
When a thing is funny, search it for a hidden truth.
- George Bernard Shaw
Man is least himself when he talks in his own person.
Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.
- Oscar Wilde
Use the power of your word
in the direction of truth and love.
- don Miguel Ruiz
The words of truth are always paradoxical.
- Lao Tzu
The water in a vessel is sparkling;
the water in the sea is dark.
The small truth has words which are clear;
the great truth has great silence.
- Rabindranath Tagore
Truth is absolute, but only to one person.
My truth is absolute to me, and your truth is absolute to you.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Intense feeling too often obscures the truth.
- Harry S. Truman
When you are sorrowful, look again in your heart,
and you shall see that in truth
you are weeping for that which has been your delight.
- Khalil Gibran
The goal of education is the advancement of knowledge
and the dissemination of truth.
- John F. Kennedy
A man must be both stupid and uncharitable
who believes there is no virtue or truth but on his own side.
- Joseph Addison
We are not afraid to follow truth
wherever it may lead,
nor to tolerate any error
so long as reason is left free to combat it.
- Thomas Jefferson
I am sorry to think that you do not get a man's
most effective criticism until you provoke him.
Severe truth is expressed with some bitterness.
- Henry David Thoreau
Having a personal opinion is great.
Believing that one's personal opinion is absolute truth
leads to most of the world's troubles.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Our actions are constrained by fear of reprisal,
but our dreams reveal our true character.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Every mind must make its choice
between truth and repose.
It cannot have both.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
We take refuge in pride,
because we are afraid to tell the truth to ourselves.
- Kakuzo Okakura
The slavery of fear had made men afraid to think.
But such is the irresistible nature of truth,
that all it asks, and all it wants, is the liberty of appearing.
- Thomas Paine, Rights of Man, 1791
The truth of the matter is that
you always know the right thing to do.
The hard part is doing it.
- Norman Schwarzkoff
Truth is always in harmony with herself,
and is not concerned chiefly to reveal the justice
that may consist with wrong-doing.
- Henry David Thoreau
I believe that it is better to tell the truth than a lie.
I believe it is better to be free than to be a slave.
And I believe it is better to know than to be ignorant.
- H.L. Mencken
No face which we can give to a matter
will stead us so well at last as the truth.
This alone wears well.
- Henry David Thoreau
The false can never grow into truth by growing in power.
- Rabindranath Tagore
Three things cannot be long hidden:
the sun, the moon, and the truth.
- The Buddha
All the religions of the world,
while they may differ in other respects,
unitedly proclaim that nothing lives in this world but Truth.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Even the truth, when believed, is a lie.
You must experience the truth, not believe it.
- Werner Erhard
'Tis strange - but true;
for truth is always strange;
Stranger than fiction.
- Lord Byron
We tell the real truth of our life
by the stories we repeatedly tell.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
There's a world of difference between truth and facts.
Facts can obscure truth.
- Maya Angelou
Truth is handsomer than the affectation of love.
Your goodness must have some edge to it, else it is none.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Mistakes are, after all, the foundations of truth,
and if a man does not know what a thing is,
it is at least an increase in knowledge
if he knows what it is not.
- Carl Jung
It is error alone which needs the support of government.
Truth can stand by itself.
- Thomas Jefferson
Even if you are a minority of one,
the truth is the truth.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Dispassionate objectivity is itself a passion,
for the real and for the truth.
- Abraham Maslow
My religion is based on truth and non-violence.
Truth is my God. Non-violence is the means of realizing Him.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Half a truth is often a great lie.
- Benjamin Franklin
Whoever is careless with the truth in small matters
cannot be trusted with important matters.
- Albert Einstein
Non-violence and truth are inseparable and presuppose one another.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Truth stands, even if there be no public support.
It is self-sustained.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Men occasionally stumble over the truth,
but most of them pick themselves up
and hurry off as if nothing had happened.
- Winston Churchill
If you shut the door to all errors,
truth will be shut out.
- Rabindranath Tagore
A nation that is afraid to let its people
judge the truth and falsehood in an open market
is a nation that is afraid of its people.
- John F. Kennedy
ANYONE may become a revealer of Truth
who lives in close contact with the indwelling God.
- Ernest Holmes
Truth is not only violated by falsehood;
it may be equally outraged by silence.
- Henri Frederic Amiel
The pursuit of truth does not permit violence on one's opponent.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.