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Love is serene and calm
- Erica Jong
Gossip is the opiate of the oppressed.
- Erica Jong
We are finally driven to monogamy
not by morality but by exhaustion.
- Erica Jong
Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer
but wish we didn't.
- Erica Jong 
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Jealousy is all the fun you think they had.
- Erica Jong
He who can take advice is sometimes superior
to him who can give it.
- Erica Jong
Take your life in your own hands, and what happens?
A terrible thing: no one to blame.
- Erica Jong
Driving me away is easier than saying goodbye.
- Erica Jong
Hate generalizes; love is particular.
- Erica Jong
The trouble is,
if you don't risk anything,
you risk even more.
- Erica Jong
I have accepted fear as a part of life -
specifically the fear of change...
I have gone ahead despite the pounding
in the heart that says: turn back.
- Erica Jong
If you don't risk anything, you risk even more.
- Erica Jong
Solitude is considered un-American.
- Erica Jong
Betrayal betrays the betrayer.
- Erica Jong
Friends love misery, in fact.
Sometimes, especially if we are too lucky
or too successful or too pretty,
our misery is the only thing that endears us to our friends.
- Erica Jong
The trick is not how much pain you feel -
but how much joy you feel
- Erica Jong
My reaction to porno films is as follows; After the first ten minutes,
I want to go home and screw; After the first twenty minutes,
I never want to screw again as long as I live
- Erica Jong
No one ever found wisdom without also being a fool.
Writers, alas, have to be fools in public,
while the rest of the human race can cover its tracks.
- Erica Jong
Men have always detested women's gossip
because they suspect the truth:
their measurements are being taken and compared.
- Erica Jong
Love gives without taking
- Erica Jong
The best slave does not need to be beaten. She beats herself.
- Erica Jong
Because I loved myself, I was loved.
- Erica Jong
If sex and creativity are often
seen by dictators as subversive activities,
it's because they lead to the knowledge
that you own your own body
(and with it your own voice), and that's
the most revolutionary insight of all.
- Erica Jong
In a bad marriage, friends are the invisible glue.
If we have enough friends, we may go on for years,
intending to leave, talking about leaving -
instead of actually getting up and leaving.
- Erica Jong
Love is an irresistible desire
to be irresistibly desired.
- Robert Frost
The first sigh of love is the last breath of wisdom.
- Anonymous
Love conquers all things except poverty and a toothache.
- Mae West
Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another.
- H. L. Mencken
I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner
Love is like an hourglass,
with the heart filling up as the brain empties.
- Jules Renard
Men always want to be a woman's first love -
women like to be a man's last romance.
- Oscar Wilde
Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
- H. L. Mencken
In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland
Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
- Albert Einstein
Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter
quite like unrequited love.
- Charlie Brown in Charles M. Schulz' Peanuts comic
Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.
- H. L. Mencken
True love comes quietly,
without banners or flashing lights.
If you hear bells, get your ears checked.
- Erich Segal
Oh, come on, Shrek, wake up and smell the pheromones!
- the movie Shrek (2001)
I'd like to kiss ya, but I just washed ma hair.
- the movie The Cabin in the Cotton
My boyfriend and I broke up.
He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.
- Rita Rudner
Love thy neighbor -
and if he happens to be tall,
debonair and devastating,
it will be that much easier.
- Mae West
Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein
My wife ran off with my best friend, and I sure do miss him.
- Anonymous
Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth
until the hour of separation.
- Khalil Gibran
Love is only a dirty trick played on us
to achieve continuation of the species.
- W. Somerset Maugham
Love is a grave mental disease.
- Plato
Love is metaphysical gravity.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
A honeymoon should be like a table:
four bare legs and no drawers.
- Anonymous
Save a boyfriend for a rainy day -
and another, in case it doesn't rain.
- Mae West
Love is what makes two people
sit in the middle of a park bench
when there is plenty of room at both ends.
- Anonymous
One's first love is always perfect
until one meets one's second love.
- Elizabeth Aston
A woman in love can't be reasonable -
or she probably wouldn't be in love.
- Mae West
The feeling of friendship is like that
of being comfortably filled with roast beef;
love, like being enlivened with champagne.
- Samuel Johnson
The only true love is love at first sight;
second sight dispels it.
- Israel Zangwill
Love looks through a telescope;
envy, through a microscope.
- Josh Billings
The Wedding March always reminds me of the music
played when soldiers go into battle.
- Heinrich Heine
I love to shop after a bad relationship.
I don't know. I buy a new outfit
and it makes me feel better. It just does.
Sometimes I see a really great outfit,
I'll break up with someone on purpose.
- Rita Rudner
A relationship, I think, is like a shark.
You know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies.
And I think what we got on our hands is a dead shark.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall (1977)
True love is like ghosts,
which everyone talks about and few have seen.
- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
When you are courting a nice girl
an hour seems like a second.
When you sit on a red-hot cinder
a second seems like an hour.
That's relativity.
- Albert Einstein
Love is loving what your lover loves.
- Anonymous
If (s)he's an apple and you're an orange,
celebrate your differences -
make a great fruit salad.
Love isn't about being the same -
it's about being sweet with each other.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All discarded lovers should be given a second chance,
but with somebody else.
- Mae West
If love is the answer,
could you please rephrase the question.
- Lily Tomlin
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
- Anonymous
When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.
- Mark Twain
To keep your marriage brimming,
With love in the wedding cup,
Whenever you're wrong, admit it;
Whenever you're right, shut up.
- Ogden Nash
You may call God love, you may call God goodness.
But the best name for God is compassion.
- Meister Eckhart
I Dream This Day of Wondrous Things,
of Peace and Hope and Pride.
I Dance My Dance with Life Today,
I'm Filled with Love Inside.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I have found that if you love life,
life will love you back.
- Arthur Rubinstein
Love is the flower you've got to let grow.
- John Lennon
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.