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Funny Morality Quotes
Funny Quotes about Morality

Let these funny Morality Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

Morality is simply the attitude we adopt
towards people whom we personally dislike.
- Oscar Wilde

Force always attracts men of low morality.
- Albert Einstein

Morality which depends upon the helplessness
of a man or woman has not much to recommend it.
Morality is rooted in the purity of our hearts.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Morality is the theory that every human act
must be either right or wrong,
and that 99 % of them are wrong.
- H. L. Mencken


 

We are finally driven to monogamy
not by morality but by exhaustion.
- Erica Jong

BERLIN: PROCLAMATION TO THE GERMAN NATION FEBRUARY 1, 1933
The National Government will regard it as its first and foremost duty
to revive in the nation the spirit of unity and co-operation.
It will preserve and defend those basic principles
on which our nation has been built.
It regards Christianity as the foundation of our national morality,
and the family as the basis of national life....
- Adolph Hitler

Universal compassion is the only guarantee of morality.
- Arthur Schopenhauer


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Every young man would do well to remember that all
successful business stands on the foundation of morality.
- Henry Ward Beecher

Morality and its victim, the mother -
what a terrible picture!
Is there indeed anything more terrible,
more criminal, than our glorified sacred function of motherhood?
- Emma Goldman

Morality is contraband in war.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

A system of morality which is based
on relative emotional values
is a mere illusion, a thoroughly vulgar conception
which has nothing sound in it and nothing true.
- Socrates

I reject any religious doctrine that does not appeal
to reason and is in conflict with morality.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Do not be too moral.
You may cheat yourself out of much life.
So aim above morality.
Be not simply good;
be good for something.
- Henry David Thoreau

Money, not morality, is the principle commerce of civilized nations.
- Thomas Jefferson

Academe, n.: An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught.
Academy, n.: A modern school where football is taught.
- Ambrose Bierce

To say that authority, whether secular or religious,
supplies no ground for morality
is not to deny the obvious fact that it supplies a sanction.
- Joseph Addison

Aim above morality.
Be not simply good,
be good for something.
- Henry David Thoreau

Reverence for life affords me my fundamental principle of morality.
- Albert Schweitzer

Morality is of the highest importance -
but for us, not for God.
- Albert Einstein

Compassion is the basis of morality.
- Arthur Schopenhauer

Art, like morality, consists in drawing the line somewhere.
- Gilbert K. Chesterton

Truth is certainly a branch of morality
and a very important one to society.
- Thomas Jefferson

Morality is the basis of things
and truth is the substance of all morality.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

A man does what he must - in spite of personal consequences,
in spite of obstacles and dangers and pressures -
and that is the basis of all human morality.
- John F. Kennedy

If the Great Way perishes, there will be morality and duty.
When cleverness and knowledge arise, great lies will flourish.
When relatives fall out with one another,
there will be filial duty and love.
When states are in confusion there will be faithful servants.
- Lao Tzu

I saw that all beings are fated to happiness:
action is not life,
but a way of wasting some force, an enervation.
Morality is the weakness of the brain.
- Arthur Rimbaud

Morality is not only taught; it is caught.
- Neil Kurshan

To set up as a standard of public morality a notion
which can neither be defined nor conceived is to open
the door to every kind of tyranny.
- Simone Weil

Morality is not the doctrine of how we may make ourselves happy,
but how we may make ourselves worthy of happiness.
- Immanuel Kant

Surveillance induced morality: relics of cultural retardation.
- Marc Maron

It is an accepted commonplace in psychology that the
spiritual level of people acting as a crowd is far
lower than the mean of each individual's intelligence or morality.
- Christian Lous Lange

I love the gallery, the arena of representation.
It's a commercial world, and morality is based generally around economics,
and that's taking place in the art gallery.
- Jeff Koons

Respect for the truth comes close to being the basis for all morality.
- Frank Herbert

But the relationship of morality and power is a very subtle one.
Because ultimately power without morality is no longer power.
- James Baldwin

The difference between religion and morality lies simply
in the classical division of things into the divine and the human,
if one only interprets this correctly.
- Karl Wilhelm Friedrich Schlegel

When morality comes up against profit,
it is seldom that profit loses.
- Shirley Chisholm

None of us can boast about the morality of our ancestors.
The record does not show that Adam and Eve were ever married.
- Edgar Watson Howe

Try to find the path of least resistance and use it without harming others.
Live with integrity and morality, not only with people but with all beings.
- Steven Seagal

The Leadership Training Institute of America trains
and equips young men and women to be leaders with high
standards of personal morality and integrity.
- Michael Burgess

The Ten Commandments are the most visible symbol because
these commandments are recognized by Christians and
Jews alike as being the foundation of our system of public morality.
- Pat Robertson

Philosophy as practice does not mean its restriction
to utility or applicability,
that is, to what serves morality or produces serenity of soul.
- Karl Jaspers

If any civilization is to survive, it is the morality
of altruism that men have to reject.
- Ayn Rand

The number, the industry, and the morality of the priesthood,
and the devotion of the people have been manifestly
increased by the total separation of the church from the state.
- James Madison

Western civilization, unfortunately,
does not link knowledge and morality but rather,
it connects knowledge and power and makes them equivalent.
- Vine Deloria, Jr.

Of woman as a real human being, with sexual needs and sexual responsibilities,
morality has often known nothing.
- Havelock Ellis

I tend to think of action movies as exuberant morality
plays in which good triumphs over evil.
- Sylvester Stallone

My parents were pretty lenient with me.
But, they gave me morality while I was growing up.
They taught me the difference between right and wrong.
- Mark Hoppus

Morality is a venereal disease.
Its primary stage is called virtue; its secondary stage,
boredom; its tertiary stage, syphilis.
- Karl Kraus

The test of the morality of a society is what it does for its children.
- Dietrich Bonhoeffer

But the imposition of morality onto science,
- where it does not belong - has become rampant in recent years.
- Bill Condon

He was as great as a man can be without morality.
- Alexis de Tocqueville

Morality will perform all this; and Morality is the fruit of Illumination.
- Adam Weishaupt

We know no spectacle so ridiculous as the British public
in one of its periodical fits of morality.
- Thomas B. Macaulay

Rigour is to the mathematician what morality is to men.
- Andre Weil

The Four Stages of Public Opinion
I (Just after publication): The novelty is absurd
and subversive of Religion and Morality.
The propounder both fool and knave.
II (Twenty years later): The Novelty is absolute Truth
and will yield a full and satisfactory
explanation of things in general -
The propounder a man of sublime genius and perfect virtue.
III (Forty years later): The Novelty won't explain
things in general after all, and therefore is a wretched failure.
The propounder a very ordinary person advertised by a clique.
IV (A century later): The Novelty a mixture of truth and error.
Explains as much as could reasonably be expected.
The propounder worthy of all honor
in spite of his share of human frailties,
as one who has added to the permanent possessions of science.
- Thomas Henry [T. H.] Huxley

Teach a child what is wise, that is morality.
Teach him what is wise and beautiful,
that is religion!
- Thomas Huxley

I believe that a long step toward public morality will
have been taken when sins are called by their right names.
- Billy Sunday

Religion without morality is a superstition and a curse,
and morality without religion is impossible.
- Mark Hopkins

Morality, as has often been pointed out,
is antecedent to religion-it even exists in a rudimentary form among animals.
- Herbert Read

I just think people should find the music that helps
them through the day and enjoy that.
I've never felt like, if somebody does or doesn't like what I'm doing,
it's a morality issue.
- Amy Grant

I think most of the art now is involved with a denial
of any kind of absolute morality,
or general morality.
- Donald Judd

The vanity of men, a constant insult to women,
is also the ground for the implicit feminine claim
of superior sensitivity and morality.
- Patricia Meyer Spacks

Religion is no more the parent of morality than an
incubator is the mother of a chicken.
- Lemuel K. Washburn

The acceptance that all that is solid has melted into the air,
that reality and morality are not givens but imperfect human constructs,
is the point from which fiction begins.
- Salman Rushdie

Morality becomes hypocrisy if it means accepting mothers'
suffering or dying in connection with unwanted pregnancies
and illegal abortions and unwanted children.
- Gro Harlem Brundtland

Deterrence itself is not a preeminent value;
the primary values are safety and morality.
- Herman Kahn

A government for the people must depend for its success on the intelligence,
the morality, the justice, and the interest of the people themselves.
- Grover Cleveland

So always, if we look back, concern for face-to-face morality,
and its modern emphasis on justice as well,
have historically evolved as religious issues.
- Huston Smith

Morality without a sense of paradox is mean.
- Karl Wilhelm Friedrich Schlegel

Honor is simply the morality of superior men.
- H. L. Mencken

I do not think athletes should get a free pass.
I don't think we should train our children and future
athletes to believe that they are above the law and morality.
- Armstrong Williams


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