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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Answer Quotes
Funny Quotes about Answer

Let these funny Answer Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

"It's not that important,
don't worry about it" is the answer,
now what was the question?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If love is the answer,
could you please rephrase the question.
- Lily Tomlin

Well, you ask a silly question, and you get a silly answer.
- Tom Lehrer

It ain't what they call you, it's what you answer to.
- W. C. Fields


 

If you can not answer a man's argument,
all is not lost; you can still call him vile names.
- Elbert Hubbard

If you ask me anything I don't know,
I'm not going to answer.
- Yogi Berra

His answer trickled through my head like water through a sieve.
- Lewis Carroll


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The answer is twelve monkeys, what's the question?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

As you awaken,
may your dreams greet you by name,
and may you answer, "Yes!"
- Mary Anne Radmacher

I refuse to answer that question
on the grounds that I don't know the answer
- Douglas Adams

Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer
but wish we didn't.
- Erica Jong

As the evening beckons with the promise of tomorrow...
may your gratitude rise up and with strength answer, "yes."
- Mary Anne Radmacher

A bird does not sing because it has an answer.
It sings because it has a song.
- Chinese Proverb

Sometimes it is said that man cannot be trusted
with the government of himself.
Can he, then be trusted with the government of others?
Or have we found angels in the form of kings to govern him?
Let history answer this question.
- Thomas Jefferson

Shake structures.
School yourself.
Look twice at a thing,
once upside down.
Answer yourself clearly.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

I am regularly asked what the average Internet user
can do to ensure his security.
My first answer is usually 'Nothing;
you're screwed'.
- Bruce Scheneier

We learn more by looking for the answer
to a question and not finding it
than we do from learning the answer itself.
- Lloyd Alexander

The answer to circumstances is choosing a positive response,
and the most positive choice is to be of service.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Science is wonderfully equipped to answer the question
"How?" but it gets terribly confused when you ask the question "Why?"
- Erwin Chargaff

NO ONE has been granted the authority to tell me
how my life should be lived.
I answer only to myself and to Spirit.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

When we have arrived at the question,
the answer is already near.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

A wise man can learn more from a foolish question
than a fool can learn from a wise answer.
- Bruce Lee

At the center of your being you have the answer;
you know who you are and you know what you want.
- Lao Tzu

Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
- Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama

The well-timed question is more impacting than an answer.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Footprints in the sand...
Where have you been?
Where are you going?
Pay attention.
Don't let resentments or pessimism answer for you.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

There ain't no answer.
There ain't gonna be any answer.
There never has been an answer.
That's the answer.
- Gertrude Stein

Love is the answer, and you know that for sure;
Love is a flower, you've got to let it grow.
- John Lennon

A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer,
it sings because it has a song.
- Lou Holtz

When you ask the wrong question,
you usually get a nonsense answer.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Doctors will have more lives to answer for in the next
world than even we generals.
- Napoleon Bonaparte

Bill Gates is a very rich man today...
and do you want to know why? The answer is one word:
versions.
- Dave Barry

The thing the sixties did was to show us the possibilities
and the responsibility that we all had.
It wasn't the answer.
It just gave us a glimpse of the possibility.
- John Lennon

Education is not the answer to the question.
Education is the means to the answer to all questions.
- William Allin

The greatest compliment that was ever paid me
was when one asked me what I thought,
and attended to my answer.
- Henry David Thoreau

Friends are those rare people who ask how we are
and then wait to hear the answer.
- Anonymous

I prayed for twenty years but received no answer until I prayed with my legs.
- Frederick Douglass

This is the answer to all questions about relationship.
When two people sing their lives in harmony,
their lives are grand.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

My bold life awaits me. I answer the call.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Forgiveness is the answer to the child's dream of a
miracle by which what is broken is made whole again,
what is soiled is made clean again.
- Dag Hammarskjold

The secret of my success is a two word answer:
Know people.
- Harvey S. Firestone

How does it become a man to behave
towards the American government today?
I answer, that he cannot without disgrace be associated with it.
- Henry David Thoreau

Demand, and my answer is NO.
Ask gently, and I am honored to serve.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

We are all "neighbors."
Our world has gotten too small for us to be anything else.
We can no longer have "us" and "them" - friends and enemies.
A person from Iraq, or Russia, or Columbia is
no more a stranger or enemy than a person from across town.
A few people everywhere are troublemakers.
Every religion provokes a few people to become extremists.
Do we need police around the globe? Unfortunately, we always will.
Do we need war? Does that question even deserve an answer?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

There are only four questions of value in life...
What is sacred?
Of what is the spirit made?
What is worth living for,
and what is worth dying for?
The answer to each is the same: only love.
- Johnny Depp as Don Juan in the movie Don Juan De Marco

Sharpen your pencil as you create the story of your life.
Ask today as you consider the many choices in your view -
what is the highest and best use
of your talents, skills and abilities?
When you answer that,
seize the opportunity to sharpen those qualities
even more sharply by applying your focused effort.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Ask today as you consider the many choices in your view -
what is the highest and best use
of your talents, skills and abilities?
When you answer that, seize the opportunity
to sharpen those qualities even more sharply
by applying your focused effort.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

For as long as I can remember, I've been searching for something,
some reason why we're here. What are we doing here? Who are we?
If this is a chance to find out
even just a little part of that answer...
I don't know, I think it's worth a human life. Don't you?
- the Jodie Foster movie Contact (1997)

The answer to old age is to keep one's mind busy and
to go on with one's life as if it were interminable.
I always admired Chekhov for building a new house when
he was dying of tuberculosis.
- Leon Edel

Let us not seek the Republican answer
or the Democratic answer,
but the right answer.
Let us not seek to fix the blame for the past.
Let us accept our own responsibility for the future.
- John F. Kennedy

No greater thing is created suddenly,
any more than a bunch of grapes or a fig.
If you tell me that you desire a fig,
I answer you that there must be time.
Let it first blossom, then bear fruit, then ripen.
- Epictetus

Often, we get stuck on a question
for which we can't find an acceptable answer.
That is a good time to consider asking a different question.
Every question is based on some assumptions -
usually invisible assumptions that we don't see, unless we go looking.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I never married because there was no need.
I have three pets at home which answer the same purpose as a husband.
I have a dog which growls every morning,
a parrot which swears all afternoon,
and a cat that comes home late at night.
- Marie Corelli

At what point then is the approach of danger to be expected?
I answer, if it ever reach us, it must spring up amongst us.
It cannot come from abroad. If destruction be our lot,
we must ourselves be its author and finisher.
As a nation of freemen, we must live
through all time, or die by suicide.
- Abraham Lincoln

He who receives a great many letters demanding answer,
sees himself as if engaged in a hopeless struggle of
one man against the rest of the world.
- Anna C. Brackett

My faith grew strong, and I sent a letter (as I was ordered) to the Rev.
Dignitary of the Cathedral of Exeter.
I was assured, before I sent it, he would not answer it.
- Joanna Southcott

All that non-fiction can do is answer questions.
It's fiction's business to ask them.
- Richard Hughes

Always have an answer - even if you change your mind five minutes later.
- Richard E. Grant

Where are the Muslim people's sponsors? Where are its
kings? Where are its leaders? The Muslim people is calling upon you,
Jerusalem is appealing to you, will anyone answer?
- Ahmed Yassin

If you want to ask about my drug problem,
go ask my big, fat, smart, ten pound daughter,
she'll answer any questions you have about it.
- Courtney Love

Most people have no idea how to politely answer a phone.
The English do, and it's been their only major business
advantage for the past two centuries.
- Doug Coupland

I realize the answer is not to create wilderness and walk away.
- Michael K. Simpson

If a man should importune me to give a reason why I loved him,
I find it could no otherwise be expressed,
than by making answer: because it was he,
because it was I. - Michel de Montaigne

People ask me how I do research for my science fiction.
The answer is, I never do any research.
- Frederik Pohl

I think that's not a question that one can answer accurately.
I read a whole range of books, quite a lot of history at the time,
and still do read a lot.
I read very widely.
- John Hume

My best attribute is knowing when not to answer stupid questions.
- Gina Gershon

But the answer to how to live is to stop thinking about it.
And just to live.
But you're doing that anyway.
However you intellectualise it, you still just live.
- Damien Hirst

It's a very good question, very direct,
and I'm not going to answer it.
- George H. W. Bush

When I found this opportunity to answer the ad,
I got the job and I've been there ever since.
- Dan DeCarlo

If you have a problem with my answer that's your problem,
not my problem.
- Dennis Rodman

An approximate answer to the right question is worth
far more than a precise answer to the wrong one.
- John Tuley


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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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