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Let these funny Luminous Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Drop guilt! - because to be guilty is to live in hell.
Not being guilty, you will have the freshness
of dewdrops in the early morning sun,
you will have the freshness of lotus petals in the lake,
you will have the freshness of the stars in the night.
Once guilt disappears you will have
a totally different kind of life, luminous and radiant.
You will have a dance to your feet
and your heart will be singing a thousand and one songs.
- Osho
Drop the sword - for there is but one flesh to wound,
and it is the one flesh of all humankind.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Individually, we are one drop.
Together, we are an ocean.
- Ryunosuke Satoro
In one drop of water are found all the secrets of all the oceans.
- Khalil Gibran
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Some years ago I became president of Columbia University
and learned within 24 hours to be ready
to speak at the drop of a hat,
and I learned something more, the trustees were expected
to be ready to speak at the passing of the hat.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
We ourselves feel that what we are doing
is just a drop in the ocean.
But the ocean would be less
because of that missing drop.
- Mother Teresa
A jug fills drop by drop.
- The Buddha
If you may count every drop of water in the ocean and
count every grain of sand in the sea -
multiply it by a thousand and that's how much I love you.
- George of Langkloof
Zen says that if you drop knowledge -
and within knowledge everything is included;
your name, your identity, everything,
because this has been given to you by others -
if you drop all that has been given by others,
you will have a totally different quality to your being: innocence.
This will be a crucifixion of the persona, the personality,
and there will be a resurrection of your innocence.
You will become a child again, reborn.
- Osho
In this world, the greatest courage is to drop the mind aside.
The bravest man is who can see the world
without the barrier of the mind, just as it is.
It is tremendously different, utterly beautiful.
There is nobody who is inferior and there is nobody who is superior -
there are no distinctions.
- Osho
Never give a sword to a man who can't dance.
- Confucius
Prejudice is a two-edged sword.
Like the steel sort of sword, it's very sharp, very useful,
and very dangerous if not properly mastered.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Those who play with the devil's toys
will be brought by degrees to wield his sword.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
Non-violence is a powerful and just weapon which cuts without wounding
and ennobles the man who wields it. It is a sword that heals.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
"Pride" is one of those really crazy words,
and such a double-edged sword -
Self-Worth on one edge, and Ego on the other.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
"Pride" is such a double-edged sword -
Self-Worth on one edge and Ego on the other.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
There is nothing more dreadful than the habit of doubt.
Doubt separates people.
It is a poison that disintegrates
friendships and breaks up pleasant relations.
It is a thorn that irritates and hurts;
it is a sword that kills.
- The Buddha
I am the Wizard. This world is mine.
I speak. It's done. My realm is fine.
My wand, my tongue. My sword, my voice.
It's good. It's bad. I speak my choice.
I say happy, or I say mad.
I say angry, or I say glad.
I name that drawing on the wall.
It's not graffiti after all.
The past has been broken. The prison's not real.
My word holds the magic - the power to heal.
Intent is my weapon - a sword from above.
Cruel hate, fear, and anger transmute into love.
This world's my joy. This mouth's my toy.
Reborn -I'm a brand new girl or boy.
I choose. I speak. My will is done.
Come join. Come play. This can be fun.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde
Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz
Never call an accountant a credit to his profession;
a good accountant is a debit to his profession.
- Charles Lyell
And you just gotta remember, Sparky -
no matter what they tell you - you can NEVER have too much sugar.
- the movie Michael (1996)
Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire
We have a great life here in Alaska,
and we're never going back to America again!
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
- Winston Churchill
You never really know a man until you have divorced him.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
- Phyllis Diller
I read that you should never go out with someone
if you can think of three reasons why you shouldn't.
- the movie Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason (2004)
Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?
- Edgar Bergen
You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly,
but I bet you ain't never seen a DONKEY fly!
- the movie Shrek (2001)
One can never consent to creep when one feels the impulse to soar.
- Helen Keller
The way for a young man to rise is
to improve himself in every way he can,
never suspecting that anybody wishes to hinder him.
- Abraham Lincoln
The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.
- Oscar Wilde
I was wise enough to never grow up
while fooling most people into believing I had.
- Margaret Mead
Never stir up litigation.
A worse man can scarcely be found than one who does this.
- Abraham Lincoln
Stay Happy, never let anyone get your goat.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
One should never trust a woman who tells her real age.
If she tells that, she'll tell anything.
- Oscar Wilde
Life is never fair, and perhaps it is a good thing
for most of us that it is not.
- Oscar Wilde
Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves
for they shall never cease to be amused.
- Anonymous
Two things a man should never be angry at:
what he can help,
and what he cannot help.
- Thomas Fuller
People who want to share their religious views with you
almost never want you to share yours with them.
- Dave Barry
You never can tell with bees.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
One should always be in love.
That is the reason one should never marry.
- Oscar Wilde
I never considered a difference of opinion
in politics, in religion, in philosophy,
as cause for withdrawing from a friend.
- Thomas Jefferson
You are Never Too Old to Give or Get Gold Stars.
Show Your Honest Appreciation - Today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I always pass on good advice.
It is the only thing to do with it.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde
Never put off till tomorrow
what you can do the day after tomorrow.
- Mark Twain
Until you've lost your reputation,
you never realize what a burden it was.
- Margaret Mitchell
Never let the fear of striking out get in your way.
- Babe Ruth
I have great hopes that we shall love each other all our lives
as much as if we had never married at all.
- Lord Byron
One should never know too precisely
whom one has married
- Friedrich Nietzsche
TEAMWORK...means never having to take all the blame yourself.
- Anonymous
The savage in man is never quite eradicated.
- Henry David Thoreau
It's never too late -
never too late to start over,
never too late to be happy.
- Jane Fonda
I never make stupid mistakes.
Only very, very clever ones.
- John Peel
Never try to teach a pig to sing.
It wastes your time, and it annoys the pig.
- Mark Twain
My father always told me that
all businessmen were sons of bitches,
but I never believed it till now.
- John F. Kennedy
Which form of proverb do you prefer
Better late than never, or Better never than late?
- Lewis Carroll
Do not take life too seriously.
You will never get out of it alive.
- Elbert Hubbard
Eating words has never given me indigestion.
- Winston Churchill
Man's nature is not essentially evil.
Brute nature has been known to
yield to the influence of love.
You must never despair of human nature.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Conscience is a mother-in-law whose visit never ends.
- H. L. Mencken
Things have never been more like the way they are today in history.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
Never trust spiritual leader who doesn't dance.
- Miyagi: character in the movie The Next Karate Kid
Some things will never seem adequate
no matter how hard we try.
- from the movie White Man's Burden
I would never want to be a member of a group
whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
- George Carlin
A person who never made a mistake
never tried anything new.
- Albert Einstein
I never accepted the idea
that I had to be guided by
some pattern or blueprint.
- Little Richard
Never interrupt someone doing what you said couldn't be done.
- Amelia Earhart
You are never too old to set another goal
or to dream a new dream.
- C. S. Lewis
There are only two or three human stories,
and they go on repeating themselves as fiercely
as if they had never happened before.
- Willa Cather
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.