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Let these funny Factual Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Thoughtful people seldom share exactly the same opinion -
the same point-of-view.
The wise ones understand that they know nothing -
for virtually none of our experience is truly factual -
and they graciously honor all other opinions.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If I am happy in spite of my deprivations,
if my happiness is so deep that it is a faith,
so thoughtful that it becomes a philosophy of life.
If, in short, I am an optimist,
my testimony to the creed of optimism is worth hearing.
- Helen Keller
...
Helen Keller (1880-1968) overcame being both deaf and blind
to become a famous author, lecturer, and activist
for women's suffrage, workers' rights, and ending war.
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful,
committed people can change the world.
Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.
- Margaret Mead
Honor True Self
Forgive with Compassion
Receive ALL of life with Thanksgiving
CHOOSE with Thoughtful Consideration
Dream with Powerful Vision
Act with Bold Courage
Dance with a Light Heart
Relax in the Arms of Spirit
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
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I CHOOSE with Thoughtful Consideration:
I renounce all assumptions and expectations,
and declare that I will thoughtfully consider
all possibilities and CHOOSE among them with consciousness.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I like to talk about a thing I call a "practiced pause."
Just a few moments of pausing allows me
to consider a circumstance and take stock
of what the best direction might be.
Reactions tend to rise from habit and unconsidered action.
A Response is considered and thoughtful.
My actions are my own and I am, singularly,
responsible for what I see, say, feel and exert.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
The worst part of success is to try to find
someone who is happy for you.
- Bette Midler
The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
- Henny Youngman
The purpose of our lives is to be happy.
- Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama
Nobody can be uncheered with a balloon.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland
If we were meant to be happy,
why did God create war, hunger, and the 11 o'clock news?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Puritanism. The haunting fear that
someone, somewhere, may be happy.
- H. L. Mencken
My advice to you is get married:
if you find a good wife you'll be happy;
if not, you'll become a philosopher.
- Socrates
Stay Happy, never let anyone get your goat.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Money won't make you happy...
but everybody wants to find out for themselves.
- Zig Ziglar
It's never too late -
never too late to start over,
never too late to be happy.
- Jane Fonda
Laugh when you can,
apologize when you should,
and let go of what you can't change.
Life's too short to be anything... but happy.
- Anonymous
A happy family is but an earlier heaven.
- George Bernard Shaw
Anyone who knows history, particularly
the history of Europe, will, I think,
recognize that the domination
of education or of government
by any one particular religious faith
is never a happy arrangement for the people.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
If anyone is unhappy, remember that
his unhappiness is his own fault...
Nothing else is the cause of anxiety or loss of tranquility
except our own opinion.
- Epictetus
Your greatest gift to your family and friends is yourself -
your relaxed, happy, and fully-present self.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If you want to be happy, be.
- Leo Tolstoy
We all live with the objective of being happy;
our lives are all different and yet the same.
- Anne Frank
It isn't what you have, or who you are, or where you are,
or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy.
It is what you think about.
- Dale Carnegie
The walls we build around us to
keep sadness out also keeps out the joy.
- Jim Rohn
To laugh often and much;
to win the respect of intelligent people
and the affection of children,
to leave the world a better place,
to know even one life has breathed easier
because you have lived,
this is to have succeeded.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Happy Birthday!
Today is YOUR day to Dance Lightly With Life.
Have a wonderful day.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Simple living is the way to happy living.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If we are not happy and joyous at this season,
for what other season shall we wait and
for what other time shall we look?
- Abdul-Baha
Happy is the hearing man; unhappy the speaking man.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Take risks: if you win, you will be happy;
if you lose, you will be wise.
- Anonymous
The only reason you suffer is because you choose to suffer.
The only reason you are happy is because you choose to be happy.
Happiness is a choice, and so is suffering.
- don Miguel Ruiz
The happiness of one's own heart alone
cannot satisfy the soul;
one must try to include,
as necessary to one's own happiness,
the happiness of others.
- Paramahansa Yogananda
The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.
- e. e. cummings
To leave the world a bit better ...
to know that one life has breathed easier because you have lived.
This is to have succeeded.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The best way to cheer yourself
is to try to cheer someone else up.
- Mark Twain
The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance;
the wise grows it under his feet.
- J. Robert Oppenheimer
The key to happiness is inner peace.
The greatest obstacles to inner peace are disturbing emotions
such as anger, attachment, fear and suspicion,
while love and compassion and a sense of universal responsibility
are the sources of peace and happiness.
- Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama
Learn to be calm and you will always be happy.
- Paramahansa Yogananda
The supreme happiness of life
is the conviction of being loved for yourself,
or, more correctly, being loved in spite of yourself.
- Victor Hugo
The Paradox Of Living In The Moment is -
How To Be Happy Today AND Prepare For Tomorrow
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Okay, so it's a matter of life and death - now are you happy?
Urgency is never a path to joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
You know you love someone when you know
you want them to be happy,
even if their happiness means
that you are not a part of it.
- Anonymous
The key to happiness is having dreams.
The key to success is making your dreams come true.
- Anonymous
By all means marry.
If you get a good wife, you'll be happy.
If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher
and that is a good thing for any man.
- Socrates
When you feel worried and depressed,
consciously form a smile on your face and act upbeat
until the happy feeling becomes genuine.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
For a happy marriage,
love and accept your spouse just the way they are.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Training yourself to live in the present -
without regretting the past or fearing the future -
is a recipe for a happy life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A Happy Day is a day I see all of life
with the eyes of compassion.
- Rory J. Corsiglia
Today is a perfect day to be happy.
Every day is a perfect day to be happy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect.
It means that you've decided to look beyond the imperfections.
- Anonymous
It all comes to this:
the simplest way to be happy is to do good.
- Helen Keller
I choose to feel supremely happy at this very moment.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I become happy when I choose to accept and love all of life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Ring out the old, ring in the new,
Ring, happy bells, across the snow:
The year is going, let him go;
Ring out the false, ring in the true.
- Alfred, Lord Tennyson
As a well-spent day brings happy sleep,
so a life well spent brings happy death.
- Leonardo da Vinci
The only ones among you who will be really happy
are those who will have sought and found how to serve.
- Albert Schweitzer
Your greatest gift to others is to be happy
and to radiate your happiness to the entire world.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The successful and happy ones dance lightly with life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Forgive those who have injured you -
not because they deserve your forgiveness,
but because you can never be happy
until you release your anger and grant forgiveness.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A happy life consists not in the absence,
but in the mastery of hardships.
- Helen Keller
We act as though comfort and luxury
were the chief requirements of life,
when all that we need to make us really happy
is something to be enthusiastic about.
- Charles Kingsley
It costs you nothing to make another happy -
and you gain your true self through the act of spreading joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Would you rather be right or happy?
- A Course in Miracles
The trick is in what one emphasizes.
We either make ourselves miserable,
or we make ourselves happy.
The amount of work is the same.
- Carlos Castaneda
Lighten up! Slow down the shopping.
Your greatest gift to your family and friends is yourself -
your relaxed, happy, and fully-present self.
Consider gifting hand-made cards with messages
of true appreciation in place of store-bought presents.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I can see, and that is why I can be happy,
in what you call the dark, but which to me is golden.
I can see a God-made world, not a manmade world.
- Helen Keller
Resolve to keep happy, and your joy
and you shall form an invincible host against difficulties.
- Helen Keller
Believe in yourself. Have faith in your abilities.
Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers
you cannot be successful or happy.
- Norman Vincent Peale
Think of all the beauty still left around you and be happy.
- Anne Frank
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.