Funny Careless Quotes - Funny Quotes about Careless

Funny Careless Quotes
Funny Quotes about Careless

Let these funny Careless Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

Whoever does not regard what he has
as most ample wealth, is unhappy,
though he be master of the world.
- Epictetus

Whoever undertakes to set himself up
as a judge of Truth and Knowledge
is shipwrecked by the laughter of the gods.
- Albert Einstein

Nothing is more valuable than your self respect.
When you lose respect for yourself, you have lost everything.
Whatever it takes, and whoever you upset,
do what you know - deep inside - is the right thing.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Loneliness is not what it seems.
One does not feel lonely because one is alone,
but because of a feeling of lack -
a feeling that something is missing.
Loneliness is essentially independent
of how many other humans are around.
It has much more to do with one's self-esteem -
one's sense of inherent worth.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Existence needs you.
Without you, something will be missing
in existence and nobody can replace it.
Thats what gives you dignity,
that the whole existence will miss you.
- Osho

We ourselves feel that what we are doing
is just a drop in the ocean.
But the ocean would be less
because of that missing drop.
- Mother Teresa

Nothing is missing - Lack is an illusion.
We always have everything we truly need.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Love is missing someone whenever you're apart,
but somehow feeling warm inside because you're close in heart.
- Kay Knudsen

When a person doesn't have gratitude,
something is missing in his or her humanity.
A person can almost be defined by
his or her attitude toward gratitude.
- Elie Wiesel

Whenever God wakes in us, our thinking
becomes clear - nothing is missing.
- St. Thomas Aquinas

When you are alone you are not alone,
you are simply lonely -
and there is a tremendous difference
between loneliness and aloneness.
When you are lonely you are thinking of the other,
you are missing the other.
Loneliness is a negative state.
You are feeling that it would have been
better if the other were there -
your friend, your wife, your mother,
your beloved, your husband.
It would have been good if the other
were there, but the other is not.
Loneliness is absence of the other.
Aloneness is the presence of oneself.
Aloneness is very positive.
It is a presence, overflowing presence.
You are so full of presence
that you can fill the whole universe
with your presence and there is no need for anybody.
- Osho

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand

It's not the size of the dog in the fight,
it's the size of the fight in the dog.
- Mark Twain

"It's not that important,
don't worry about it" is the answer,
now what was the question?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer

Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.
- Will Rogers

DON'T get officious.
You're not yourself when you're officious -
That is the curse of a government job.
- the movie Harold and Maude (1971)

Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed.
But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops.
Uh, depending on the breaks.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove

The key is, to not think of death as an end,
but as more of a very effective way to cut down on your expenses.
- the movie Love and Death

Marriage is a fine institution -
but I'm not ready for an institution yet.
- Mae West

No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous

Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire

Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West

The most important words in the English language
are not "I love you" but "It's benign."
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein

I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln

Personally, I'm always ready to learn,
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill

Two things are infinite:
the universe and human stupidity;
and I'm not sure about the universe.
- Albert Einstein

It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel

I'm not used to feeling so human.
Is it always like this?
- Edward, from Twilight Saga by Stephenie Meyer

I'm not talking about lust.
A woman in lust wants chocolate.
A woman in love wants diamonds.
- the movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days

Yeah I called her up. She gave me a bunch of ...
about me not listening to her, or something.
I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.
- the movie Dumb & Dumber (1994)

In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous

Damn it boss, I like you too much not to say it.
You've got everything except one thing: madness!
- the movie Zorba The Greek

Do not use a hatchet to remove
a fly from your friend's forehead.
- Chinese Proverb

If Christ were here now there is one thing
he would not be - a Christian.
- Mark Twain

If you can not answer a man's argument,
all is not lost; you can still call him vile names.
- Elbert Hubbard

Silence is not always a Sign of Wisdom,
but Babbling is ever a folly.
- Benjamin Franklin

We are finally driven to monogamy
not by morality but by exhaustion.
- Erica Jong

I once had a rose named after me
and I was very flattered.
But I was not pleased to read
the description in the catalogue:
no good in a bed, but fine up against a wall.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Politics is such a torment that I advise everyone
I love not to mix with it.
- Thomas Jefferson

Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth
until the hour of separation.
- Khalil Gibran

I do not believe in using women in combat,
because females are too fierce.
- Margaret Mead

The wine of youth does not always
clear with advancing years;
sometimes it grows turbid.
- Carl Jung

For centuries, theologians have been explaining
the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-knowing.
- H. L. Mencken

Genius may have its limitations,
but stupidity is not thus handicapped.
- Elbert Hubbard

Science is a wonderful thing
if one does not have to earn one's living at it.
- Albert Einstein

When dealing with people, remember you are
not dealing with creatures of logic,
but creatures of emotion.
- Dale Carnegie

Only two things are infinite,
the universe and human stupidity,
and I'm not sure about the former.
- Albert Einstein

I am always ready to learn
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill

The function of muscle is to pull and not to push,
except in the case of the genitals and the tongue.
- Leonardo da Vinci

When I want to be bold about my movement ...
I for sure do not call it exercise!
- Mary Anne Radmacher

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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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Funny Careless Quotes
Funny Quotes about Careless