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Let these funny Bell Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
One minute you're in the lunchroom at Glenwood High
and you ... blink and you're 40,
you blink again and you can see movies
at half price on a senior citizen's pass.
Ask not for whom the bell tolls, or to put it more accurately,
ask not for whom the toilet flushes.
- the Woody Allen movie Celebrity
Every time you hear a bell ring,
it means that some angel's just got his wings.
- It's a Wonderful Life (1946 movie)
One man's theology is another man's belly laugh.
- Robert A. Heinlein
It is any day better to stand erect
with a broken and bandaged head
then to crawl on one's belly,
in order to be able to save one's head.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
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He didn't come out of my belly, but my God,
I've made his bones, because I've attended to every meal,
and how he sleeps,
and the fact that he swims like a fish
because I took him to the ocean.
I'm so proud of all those things.
But he is my biggest pride.
- John Lennon
True love comes quietly,
without banners or flashing lights.
If you hear bells, get your ears checked.
- Erich Segal
Ring out the old, ring in the new,
Ring, happy bells, across the snow:
The year is going, let him go;
Ring out the false, ring in the true.
- Alfred, Lord Tennyson
If it's true that our species is alone in the universe,
then I'd have to say that the universe
aimed rather low and settled for very little.
- George Carlin
I don't care what anybody says about me
as long as it isn't true.
- Truman Capote
There are a terrible lot of lies going about the world,
and the worst of it is that half of them are true.
- Winston Churchill
True believers just don't see things the way they are,
because if they did, they wouldn't be true believers anymore.
- Philip Caputo
A true friend is one who
overlooks your failures
and tolerates your success.
- Doug Larson
It is sad but unfortunately true that
man learns nothing from history.
- Carl Jung
True friendship's laws are by this rule express'd,
Welcome the coming, speed the parting guest.
- Alexander Pope
Children, cartoon animals, comedians,
and space aliens can get away with saying
what the rest of us are afraid is true,
but are embarrassed to talk about.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Religion is regarded by the common people as true,
by the wise as false, and by the rulers as useful.
- Lucius Annaeus Seneca
This above all, to thine own self be true.
- William Shakespeare
Faith: not wanting to know what is true.
- Friedrich Nietzsche
All our dreams can come true,
if we have the courage to pursue them.
- Walt Disney
True love is like ghosts,
which everyone talks about and few have seen.
- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
A true friend stabs you in the front.
- Oscar Wilde
The only true love is love at first sight;
second sight dispels it.
- Israel Zangwill
The true mystery of the world is the visible, not the invisible.
- Oscar Wilde
I do not need anyone's permission to be my true self.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A true friend is someone who
thinks that you are a good egg
even though he knows that
you are slightly cracked.
- Bernard Meltzer
True love is a process of co-creation
in which neither feels ownership or superiority.
Jealousy is a highly destructive force
for love and relationships.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Every religion is true one way or another.
It is true when understood metaphorically.
But when it gets stuck in its own metaphors,
interpreting them as facts, then you are in trouble.
- Joseph Campbell
The true meaning of life is to plant trees,
under whose shade you do not expect to sit.
- Nelson Henderson
Where there is shouting, there is no true knowledge.
- Leonardo da Vinci
You do not need anyone's permission to be your true self.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The book of life is filled with incoherent riddles.
Life's true lessons are inscribed in a corner of the margin.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Play with life, laugh with life,
dance lightly with life,
and smile at the riddles of life,
knowing that life's only true lessons
are writ small in the margin.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
People are stupid;
given proper motivation, almost anyone will believe almost anything.
Because people are stupid, they will believe a lie
because they want to believe it's true,
or because they are afraid it might be true.
- Terry Goodkind
The course of true love never did run smooth.
- William Shakespeare
True Love burns the brightest,
But the brightest flames leave the deepest scars.
- Anonymous
True friendship is like sound health;
the value of it is seldom known until it be lost.
- Charles Caleb Colton
True friendship is never serene.
- Marquise de Sevigne
Man prefers to believe what he prefers to be true.
- Francis Bacon
For those of true faith, death is not a time to mourn,
but a time to celebrate returning to the Creator.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The secret of making dreams come true
can be summarized in four C's.
They are Curiosity, Confidence, Courage, and Constancy;
and the greatest of these is Confidence.
- Walt Disney
If I try to be like him, who will be like me?
- Yiddish proverb
I used to believe in forever, but forever's too good to be true.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
The WORK
1.Is it true?
2.Can you absolutely know that it's true?
3.How do you react when you think that thought?
4.Who would you be without the thought?
- Byron Katie
Your inner thoughts reveal your true nature.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Those who realize their folly are not true fools.
- Zhuangzi
The function of education is to teach one
to think intensively and to think critically.
Intelligence plus character - that is the goal of true education.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
If evil be spoken of you
and it be true, correct yourself,
if it be a lie, laugh at it.
- Epictetus
A system of morality which is based
on relative emotional values
is a mere illusion, a thoroughly vulgar conception
which has nothing sound in it and nothing true.
- Socrates
Feigned courtesy is a mere shadow of true kindness.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Women are like teabags.
We don't know our true strength
until we are in hot water!
- Eleanor Roosevelt
Know that your true self,
a spiritual being,
is always perfect.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
One of the most beautiful qualities of true friendship
is to understand and to be understood.
- Lucius Annaeus Seneca
However rare true love may be,
it is less so than true friendship.
- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
Know that you do not need anyone's permission
to be your true self.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A wise man will make haste to forgive,
because he knows the true value of time,
and will not suffer it to pass away in unnecessary pain.
- Samuel Johnson
It may be true that the law cannot make a man love me,
but it can keep him from lynching me,
and I think that's pretty important.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
No one has yet realized the wealth of sympathy,
the kindness and generosity hidden in the soul of a child.
The effort of every true education should be to unlock that treasure.
- Emma Goldman
True genius resides in the capacity for evaluation
of uncertain, hazardous, and conflicting information.
- Winston Churchill
True knowledge exists in knowing that you know nothing.
- Socrates
True religion is real living;
living with all one's soul,
with all one's goodness and righteousness.
- Albert Einstein
Every loving thought is true.
Everything else is an appeal for healing and help,
regardless of the form it takes.
- A Course In Miracles
The true delight is in the finding out,
rather than in the knowing.
- Isaac Asimov
Only those who have learned the power
of sincere and selfless contribution
experience life's deepest joy: true fulfillment.
- Tony Robbins
What is true of the individual will be
tomorrow true of the whole nation
if individuals will but refuse to lose heart and hope.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Every true love song, by its very nature, is a duet.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that
they can grow separately without growing apart.
- Elisabeth Foley
If we all worked on the assumption that what is accepted as true
were really true, there would be little hope of advance.
- Orville Wright
True learning is not about facts,
but about conscious appreciation
of the experience of living.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Knowing others is intelligence;
knowing yourself is true wisdom.
Mastering others is strength;
mastering yourself is true power.
- Lao Tzu
True courage is taking another small step each day
toward achieving your vision.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A true friend is a source of strength and hope.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.