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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Watchful Quotes
Funny Quotes about Watchful

Let these funny Watchful Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

Walking is Zen, sitting is Zen.
Then what will be the quality?
Watchfully alert, joyously unmotivated,
centered, loving, flowing, one walks.
And the walking is sauntering.
Loving, alert, watchful, one sits, unmotivated -
not sitting for anything in particular,
just enjoying how beautiful
just sitting doing nothing is,
how relaxing, how restful.
- Osho

The most difficult thing in the world
is to know how to do a thing
and to watch somebody else doing it wrong,
without comment.
- Theodore. H. White

I Watch Wondrous Cloud Animals Parade My Story.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Watch out, I have a Magic Wand.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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Is today a day to gather strength from the storm -
a day to to learn life lessons for the next battle?
Or is today a day to sit by the fire
and watch the storm rage outside?
Either way, the storm is just life.
Give thanks for all of Life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

To know God, watch a butterfly return to the same tree -
after a year and a thousand miles.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

And you would accept the seasons of your heart
just as you have always accepted
that seasons pass over your fields
and you would watch with serenity
through the winters of your grief.
- Khalil Gibran


 

The simplest questions are the most profound.
Where were you born?
Where is your home?
Where are you going?
What are you doing?
Think about these once in a while
and watch your answers change.
- Richard Bach

We are tied to the ocean.
And when we go back to the sea,
whether it is to sail or to watch -
we are going back from whence we came.
- John F. Kennedy

Watch your toes when you waltz with life, Dance Lightly.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Just watch this moment, without trying to change it at all.
What is happening? What do you feel?
What do you see? What do you hear?
- Jon Kabat-Zinn

Watch what people are cynical about,
and one can often discover what they lack.
- George S. Patton

Sometimes, if you stand on the bottom rail of a bridge
and lean over to watch the river slipping slowly away beneath you,
you will suddenly know everything there is to be known.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

Give your time and efforts freely or not at all.
When you are tempted to say,
"Oh, if I have to, I'll skip my golf game
and watch my daughter play soccer," don't do it.
Either generate the heart-felt emotion
to make the free-will gift,
"I'd love to watch your game today, Sandy,"
or the honesty to decline the request gracefully.
Martyrdom doesn't create happiness
for any of the parties involved.
An honest, "No" is preferable to a coerced "Yes."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

To love. To be loved.
To never forget your own insignificance.
To never get used to the unspeakable violence
and the vulgar disparity of life around you.
To seek joy in the saddest places.
To pursue beauty to its lair.
To never simplify what is complicated
or complicate what is simple.
To respect strength, never power.
Above all, to watch. To try to understand.
To never look away. And never, never, to forget.
- Arundhati Roy

Today is my day to practice whimsey,
skip on the beach, and play with the waves,
watch wondrous cloud animals parade my story,
find a magical white bunny down every rabbit hole.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Today is your day to practice whimsey,
skip on the beach, and play with the waves,
watch wondrous cloud animals parade your story,
find a magical white bunny down every rabbit hole.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Watch your thoughts, for they become words.
Watch your words, for they become actions.
Watch your actions, for they become habits.
Watch your habits, for they become character.
Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.
- Anonymous

Life repeats itself mindlessly -
unless you become mindful, it will go on repeating like a wheel.
That's why Buddhists call it the wheel of life and death,
the wheel of time.
It moves like a wheel: birth is followed by death,
death is followed by birth;
love is followed by hate, hate is followed by love;
success is followed by failure,
failure is followed by success. Just see!
If you can watch just for a few days,
you will see a pattern emerging, a wheel pattern.
One day, a fine morning, you are feeling so good and so happy,
and another day you are so dull,
so dead that you start thinking of committing suicide.
And just the other day you were so full of life,
so blissful that you were feeling thankful to God,
that you were in a mood of deep gratefulness,
and today there is great complaint
and you don't see the point why one should go on living...
And it goes on and on, but you don't see the pattern.
Once you see the pattern, you can get out of it.
- Osho

Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man
... living in the sky. Who watches everything you do
every minute of every day. And the invisible man
has a list of ten specific things he doesn't want you to do.
And if you do any of these things,
he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire
and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever,
and suffer, and suffer, and burn, and scream,
until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you.
He loves you and he needs money.
- George Carlin

From the solemn gloom of the temple
children run out to sit in the dust,
God watches them play and forgets the priest.
- Rabindranath Tagore

Overflowing Cup of Tea:
The Zen Master poured his visitor's teacup full, and then kept pouring.
The visitor watched until he could no longer restrain himself.
"It is overfull. No more will go in!"
"Like this cup," the Zen Master said,
"you are full of your own opinions and assumptions.
How can you learn truth until you first empty your cup?"
- Traditional Zen Koan

Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer

This is my ultimate fantasy:
watching QVC with a credit card
while making love and eating at the same time.
- Yasmine Bleeth

You can observe a lot by just watching.
- Yogi Berra

Work like you don't need the money.
Love like you've never been hurt.
Dance like nobody's watching.
- Satchel Paige

Dance like no one is watching,
love like you'll never be hurt.
Sing like no one is listening.
Live life like it's heaven on earth.
- Anonymous (various attributions and alternate phrasings)

Life is a journey. It is not a race to test
who can finish first or who can end up with the most loot.
Rather, life is best enjoyed as a meander -
watching the view to left and right - above and below -
as the days slowly move past in dress review.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Love like you've never been hurt,
dance like no one is watching,
live as though heaven is on earth.
- Satchel Paige

Sing like no one's listening,
love like you've never been hurt,
dance like nobody's watching,
and live like its heaven on earth.
- Mark Twain

Whenever you do a thing,
act as if all the world were watching.
- Thomas Jefferson

Cloud Animals: Be a Child Again.
I remember warm summer afternoons,
laying in the shade of a maple tree in the back yard
of my Connecticut home watching the clouds for hours.
As those clouds formed dragons and foxes, clowns and angels,
I traveled across space and time.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I will not be just a tourist in the world of images,
just watching images passing by which I cannot live in,
make love to, possess as permanent sources of joy and ecstasy.
- Anais Nin

The Moon Cannot Be Stolen:
A thief entered the little hut of a Zen Master,
but discovered there was nothing to steal.
The Zen Master discovered the thief.
"You have come a long way to visit me," he told the prowler,
"and you should not return empty-handed.
Please take my clothes as a gift."
The thief was bewildered,
but he took the clothes and slunk away.
The Zen Master sat naked, watching the moon.
"Poor fellow," he mused,
"I wish I could have given him this beautiful moon."
- Traditional Zen Koan

Be careful about reading health books.
You may die of a misprint.
- Mark Twain

A man can't be too careful in the choice of enemies.
- Oscar Wilde

A man is usually more careful of his money
than he is of his principles.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

I choose my friends for their good looks,
my acquaintances for their good characters,
and my enemies for their intellects.
A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
- Oscar Wilde

Talent is God-given; be humble.
Fame is man-given; be thankful.
Conceit is self-given; be careful.
- John Wooden

I was thinking that I might fly today.
Just to disprove all the things you say...
please be careful with me, I'm sensitive,
and I'd like to stay that way.
- Jewel

There are three rules for dating:
1) Don't;
2) If you must, just be careful;
3) Forget the rules, your hormones will win anyway.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

People in their handlings of affairs
often fail when they are about to succeed.
If one remains as careful at the end
as he was at the beginning,
there will be no failure.
- Lao Tzu

While you are proclaiming peace with your lips,
be careful to have it even more fully in your heart.
- St. Francis of Assisi

Pride comes in two flavors -
be careful which you choose -
choose honor, not ego.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Be careful to leave your sons well instructed rather than rich,
for the hopes of the instructed
are better than the wealth of the ignorant.
- Epictetus

We are what we pretend to be,
so we must be careful what we pretend to be.
- Kurt Vonnegut

Be careful the friends you choose -
for you will become like them.
- W. Clement Stone

You got to be careful if you
don't know where you're going,
because you might not get there.
- Yogi Berra

To state the facts frankly
is not to despair the future nor indict the past.
The prudent heir takes careful inventory of his legacies
and gives a faithful accounting
to those whom he owes an obligation of trust.
- John F. Kennedy

Parents are usually more careful to bestow knowledge
on their children rather than virtue,
the art of speaking well rather than doing well;
but their manners should be of the greatest concern.
- R. Buckminster Fuller

While it is natural to feel some degree of
need for the approval of others, be careful.
If you find yourself unwilling to
take actions that others disapprove of,
you have lost control of your own life
and have given your destiny to others.
An excessive need-for-approval
is a sign of low self-esteem,
and in severe cases, a condition termed co-dependency.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If I read a book that impresses me,
I have to take myself firmly in hand
before I mix with other people;
otherwise they would think my mind rather queer.
- Anne Frank

O Day of days when we can read!
The reader and the book, either without the other is naught.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

My reading of history convinces me that most bad government
results from too much government.
- Thomas Jefferson

You don't have to burn books to destroy a culture.
Just get people to stop reading them.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Reading, after a certain age,
diverts the mind too much from its creative pursuits.
Any man who reads too much and uses his own brain too little
falls into lazy habits of thinking.
- Albert Einstein

A truly good book teaches me better than to read it.
I must soon lay it down, and commence living on its hint.
What I began by reading, I must finish by acting.
- Henry David Thoreau

Leave all the afternoon for exercise and recreation,
which are as necessary as reading.
I will rather say more necessary
because health is worth more than learning.
- Thomas Jefferson

Reading about nature is fine, but if a person
walks in the woods and listens carefully,
he can learn more than what is in books,
for they speak with the voice of God.
- George Washington Carver

Today, like every other day, we wake up empty
and frightened. Don't open the door to the study
and begin reading. Take down a musical instrument.
Let the beauty we love be what we do.
There are hundreds of ways to kneel and kiss the ground.
- Rumi (Persian poet 1207-1273)

One must be an inventor to read well.
There is then creative reading as well as creative writing.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

There is creative reading as well as creative writing.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
- Groucho Marx

I read that you should never go out with someone
if you can think of three reasons why you shouldn't.
- the movie Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason (2004)

I once had a rose named after me
and I was very flattered.
But I was not pleased to read
the description in the catalogue:
no good in a bed, but fine up against a wall.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

The man who does not read good books
has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
- Mark Twain

The length of this document defends it well
against the risk of its being read.
- Winston Churchill

I have tried lately to read Shakespeare,
and found it so intolerably dull that it nauseated me.
- Charles Darwin

This report, by its very length, defends itself
against the risk of being read.
- Winston Churchill

In boundless love as a Christian and as a man
I read through the passage which tells us
how the Lord at last rose in His might
and seized the scourge to drive out of the Temple
the brood of vipers and of adders.
- Adolf Hitler

Believe nothing, no matter where you read it,
or who said it, no matter if I have said it,
unless it agrees with your own reason
and your own common sense.
- The Buddha


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.