Facebook share Tweet This Email this
Let these funny Immortal Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Fear not death; for the sooner we die,
the longer shall we be immortal.
- Benjamin Franklin
All men's souls are immortal,
but the souls of the righteous are immortal and divine.
- Socrates
What we have done for ourselves alone dies with us;
what we have done for others and the world
remains and is immortal.
- Albert Pike
A man is a god in ruins.
When men are innocent, life shall be longer,
and shall pass into the immortal,
as gently as we awake from dreams.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Get a Funny Quote of the Day each day by email or in your feed reader.
What would be the use of immortality to a person
who cannot use well a half an hour.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Perhaps nature is our best assurance of immortality.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
Millions long for immortality
who don't know what to do on a rainy Sunday afternoon.
- Susan Ertz
I do not believe in immortality of the individual,
and I consider ethics to be an exclusively human concern
with no superhuman authority behind it.
- Albert Einstein
Through Love and through Beauty, we achieve immortality.
- Jewel (paraphrasing Plato)
Friendship, like the immortality of the soul,
is too good to be believed.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
I argue thee that love is life.
And life hath immortality.
- Emily Dickinson
Surely God would not have created such a being as man,
with an ability to grasp the infinite,
to exist only for a day!
No, no, man was made for immortality.
- Abraham Lincoln
The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde
Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz
Yesterday is like a dung heap;
you can complain about the smell,
or you can use it to fertilize tomorrow's garden.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Do not use a hatchet to remove
a fly from your friend's forehead.
- Chinese Proverb
"When I use a word," Humpty Dumpty said in rather a scornful tone,
"it means just what I choose it to mean - neither more nor less."
- Lewis Carroll
The civilized man has built a coach,
but has lost the use of his feet.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
There is no use whatsoever trying to help
people who do not help themselves.
You cannot push anyone up a ladder
unless he is willing to climb himself.
- Andrew Carnegie
In life you are given two ends;
one to think with and the other to sit on.
Your success in life depends on which end you use most.
Heads you win, tails you lose.
- Conrad Burns
I always pass on good advice.
It is the only thing to do with it.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde
If at first you don't succeed,
try, try, and try again.
Then give up.
There's no use being a damned fool about it.
- W. C. Fields
Use the power of your word
in the direction of truth and love.
- don Miguel Ruiz
It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn't use long, difficult words
but rather short, easy words like "What about lunch?"
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
"Worry" is a word that I don't allow myself to use.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
It is no use walking anywhere to preach
unless our walking is our preaching.
- St. Francis of Assisi
Capital as such is not evil; it is its wrong use that is evil.
Capital in some form or other will always be needed.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
If the problem can be solved,
there is no use worrying about it.
If it can't be solved,
worrying will do no good.
- Tibetan proverb
Before we acquire great power
we must acquire wisdom to use it well.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Fear has its use but cowardice has none.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
What's the use of a fine house if you haven't got
a tolerable planet to put it on?
- Henry David Thoreau
I am an optimist.
It does not seem too much use being anything else.
- Winston Churchill
No free man shall ever be debarred the use of arms.
- Thomas Jefferson
Make the best use of what is in your power,
and take the rest as it happens.
- Epictetus
We must use time wisely and forever realize
that the time is always ripe to do right.
- Nelson Mandela
Men have a respect for scholarship and learning
greatly out of proportion to the use they commonly serve.
- Henry David Thoreau
Don't fight forces, use them.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
The Science of Mind is intensely practical
because it teaches us how to use
the Mind Principle for definite purposes,
such as helping those who are sick, impoverished, or unhappy.
- Ernest Holmes
Time stays long enough for anyone who will use it.
- Leonardo da Vinci
Use what talents you possess.
The woods would be very silent
if no birds sang there,
except those that sang best.
- Henry Van Dyke
It is not enough to have a good mind,
the main thing is to use it well.
- Rene Descartes
The means we use must be as pure
as the ends we seek.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
If I mayn't tell you what I feel,
what is the use of a friend?
- William Makepeace Thackeray
I hope our wisdom will grow with our power, and teach us,
that the less we use our power the greater it will be.
- Thomas Jefferson
In all my ways of seeing - may I use new glasses,
a telescope and a microscope.
And may I always allow myself to see a circumstance
through the tender hearts of my friends.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
We must use time as a tool, not as a crutch.
- John F. Kennedy
INTENT:
We hold the power to make things happen
through our intent -
to the extent that we use our intention
with compassion and without ego.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Use what language you will,
you can never say anything but what you are.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
People hardly ever make use of the freedom which they have,
for example, freedom of thought;
instead they demand freedom of speech as a compensation.
- Soren Kierkegaard
There is a power for good in the universe
greater than you are and you can use it.
- Ernest Holmes
All the energy of the universe is mine
to use as spirit directs.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I deplore the need or the use of troops anywhere
to get American citizens to obey
the orders of constituted courts.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
Is the system going to flatten you out
and deny you your humanity,
or are you going to be able to make use of the system
to the attainment of human purposes?
- Joseph Campbell
Understand that the right to
choose your own path
is a sacred privilege.
Use it.
Dwell in possibility.
- Oprah Winfrey
The road to freedom lies not through
mysteries or occult performances,
but through the intelligent use
of natural forces and laws.
- Ernest Holmes
It is no use saying, "We are doing our best."
You have got to succeed in doing what is necessary.
- Winston Churchill
Politics are very much like war.
We may even have to use poison gas at times.
- Winston Churchill
The less I take the difficulties of my life as personal affront,
and the more I use them as an opportunity to learn and grow...
the easier I sleep at night.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Hide not your talents,
they for use were made.
What's a sundial in the shade?
- Benjamin Franklin
Education is the most powerful weapon
which you can use to change the world.
- Nelson Mandela
We must use time creatively.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Stop! Breathe deeply.
Begin bringing peace to the outer world
by regaining your own inner peace.
Choose love, choose gratitude,
choose forgiveness, choose peace.
Begin with your own inner peace.
Then use that inner peace
as a platform from which
to approach the outer world
with perspective, understanding, and patience.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Use heroes as a springboard for inquiry
into the identity and nature of admirably human qualities.
Do not judge heroes -
neither to put them unquestioningly on a pedestal
nor to unkindly probe their flaws.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The assertion that "all men are created equal"
was of no practical use in effecting our separation from Great Britain
and it was placed in the Declaration not for that, but for future use.
- Abraham Lincoln
Preach the Gospel at all times and when necessary use words.
- St. Francis of Assisi
What has happened at Guantanamo Bay...
does not represent the will of the American people.
I'm embarrassed about it, I think its wrong.
I think it does give terrorists an unwarranted excuse
to use the despicable means to hurt innocent people.
- Jimmy Carter
Love your enemies, bless them that curse you,
do good to them that hate you, and pray for them
which despitefully use you and persecute you.
- Matthew 5:44
I feel impelled to speak today in a language
that in a sense is new-one which I,
who have spent so much of my life in the military profession,
would have preferred never to use.
That new language is the language of atomic warfare.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
USE this time of fresh beginnings.
Use it as an impetus, the force or energy toward change.
Become stronger, a better leader, more focused in your thoughts.
Exert more influence over your dreams
by bringing them closer to your thoughts, every day.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Plant trees for your great-grandchildren -
for future generations.
Create the legacy of a better world.
Leave this world a better place than you found it.
Literally planting trees for
your great-grandchildren is a wonderful idea,
but far more important...
use this symbolism - this imagery -
to represent the kind of legacy
you want to leave to future generations.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
There must be a reason why some people can afford to live well.
They must have worked for it.
I only feel angry when I see waste.
When I see people throwing away things that we could use.
- Mother Teresa
Thank you for visiting: Funny Immortal Quotes - Funny Quotes about Immortal.
Please sign up on the form below to receive
my Free Daily Inspiration - Daily Quotes email.
You can also search my large collection of Funny Quotes.
May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.