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Let these funny Illusory Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Truth always rests with the minority,
and the minority is always stronger than the majority,
because the minority is generally formed by those
who really have an opinion,
while the strength of a majority is illusory,
formed by the gangs who have no opinion -
and who, therefore, in the next instant
(when it is evident that the minority is the stronger)
assume its opinion... while truth again reverts to a new minority.
- Soren Kierkegaard
It is a truth universally acknowledged that
when one part of your life starts going okay,
another falls spectacularly to pieces.
- the movie Bridget Jones Diary
Truth is a tendency.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
Bad taste is simply saying the truth before it should be said.
- Mel Brooks
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Truth is stranger than fiction,
but that is because Fiction is obliged
to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.
- Mark Twain
If you are out to describe the truth,
leave elegance to the tailor.
- Albert Einstein
My way of joking is telling the truth;
that is the funniest joke in the world.
- George Bernard Shaw
Man will occasionally stumble over the truth,
but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.
- Winston Churchill
All people know the same truth.
Our lives consist of how we chose to distort it.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
Strike an average between what a woman thinks of her husband
a month before she marries him
and what she thinks of him a year afterward,
and you will have the truth about him.
- H. L. Mencken
A remark generally hurts in proportion to its truth.
- Will Rogers
Truth is beautiful, without doubt; but so are lies.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Always speak the truth,
think before you speak,
and write it down afterwards.
- Lewis Carroll
Tell the truth, or someone will tell it for you.
- Stephanie Klein
The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.
- Oscar Wilde
The lawyer's truth is not Truth,
but consistency or a consistent expediency.
- Henry David Thoreau
The rarest quality in an epitaph is truth.
- Henry David Thoreau
If you're going to tell people the truth,
be funny or they'll kill you.
- Billy Wilder
By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
- George Carlin
If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
- Mark Twain
When a thing is funny, search it for a hidden truth.
- George Bernard Shaw
The water in a vessel is sparkling;
the water in the sea is dark.
The small truth has words which are clear;
the great truth has great silence.
- Rabindranath Tagore
Man is least himself when he talks in his own person.
Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.
- Oscar Wilde
Use the power of your word
in the direction of truth and love.
- don Miguel Ruiz
Soon we'll be out amid the cold world's strife.
Soon we'll be sliding down the razor blade of life.
But as we go our sordid sep'rate ways,
We shall ne'er forget thee, thou golden college days.
Hearts full of youth,
Hearts full of truth,
Six parts gin to one part vermouth.
- Tom Lehrer - song: Bright College Days,
album: An Evening Wasted With Tom Lehrer
The words of truth are always paradoxical.
- Lao Tzu
The truth. It is a beautiful and terrible thing,
and should be treated with caution.
- J. K. Rowling
We are not afraid to follow truth
wherever it may lead,
nor to tolerate any error
so long as reason is left free to combat it.
- Thomas Jefferson
A man must be both stupid and uncharitable
who believes there is no virtue or truth but on his own side.
- Joseph Addison
Truth is absolute, but only to one person.
My truth is absolute to me, and your truth is absolute to you.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Our actions are constrained by fear of reprisal,
but our dreams reveal our true character.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I am sorry to think that you do not get a man's
most effective criticism until you provoke him.
Severe truth is expressed with some bitterness.
- Henry David Thoreau
We take refuge in pride,
because we are afraid to tell the truth to ourselves.
- Kakuzo Okakura
Having a personal opinion is great.
Believing that one's personal opinion is absolute truth
leads to most of the world's troubles.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The goal of education is the advancement of knowledge
and the dissemination of truth.
- John F. Kennedy
Intense feeling too often obscures the truth.
- Harry S. Truman
When you are sorrowful, look again in your heart,
and you shall see that in truth
you are weeping for that which has been your delight.
- Khalil Gibran
Every mind must make its choice
between truth and repose.
It cannot have both.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The slavery of fear had made men afraid to think.
But such is the irresistible nature of truth,
that all it asks, and all it wants, is the liberty of appearing.
- Thomas Paine, Rights of Man, 1791
In wartime, truth is so precious that she
should always be attended by a bodyguard of lies.
- Winston Churchill
Love is the only reality and it is not a mere sentiment.
It is the ultimate truth that lies at the heart of creation.
- Rabindranath Tagore
God, as Truth, has been for me a treasure beyond price.
May He be so to every one of us.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
The false can never grow into truth by growing in power.
- Rabindranath Tagore
There are trivial truths and there are great truths.
The opposite of a trivial truth is plainly false.
The opposite of a great truth is also true.
- Niels Bohr
The truth of the matter is that
you always know the right thing to do.
The hard part is doing it.
- Norman Schwarzkoff
The truth is incontrovertible,
malice may attack it, ignorance may deride it,
but in the end; there it is.
- Winston Churchill
We tell the real truth of our life
by the stories we repeatedly tell.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
The problem with making assumptions
is that we believe they are the truth
- don Miguel Ruiz
There's a world of difference between truth and facts.
Facts can obscure truth.
- Maya Angelou
The truth is like a scalpel. The truth is painful.
- don Miguel Ruiz
Ignorance is preferable to error,
and he is less remote from the truth who believes nothing
than he who believes what is wrong.
- Thomas Jefferson
Love is like the truth,
sometimes it prevails,
sometimes it hurts.
- Victor M. Garcia Jr.
Truth has no special time of its own.
Its hour is now - always.
- Albert Schweitzer
Rather than love, than money, than fame, give me truth.
- Henry David Thoreau
Beyond a doubt, truth bears the same relation
to falsehood as light to darkness.
- Leonardo da Vinci
The truth is more important than the facts.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
ANYONE may become a revealer of Truth
who lives in close contact with the indwelling God.
- Ernest Holmes
What people believe prevails over the truth.
- Sophocles
There are two mistakes one can make along the road to truth
- not going all the way and not starting.
- The Buddha
If you wish to see the truth,
then hold no opinion for or against.
- Osho
He who knows nothing is closer to the truth
than he whose mind is filled with falsehoods and errors.
- Thomas Jefferson
Whoever undertakes to set himself up
as a judge of Truth and Knowledge
is shipwrecked by the laughter of the gods.
- Albert Einstein
The pursuit of truth does not permit violence on one's opponent.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Knowledge rests not upon truth alone, but upon error also.
- Carl Jung
An error does not become truth
by reason of multiplied propagation,
nor does truth become error because nobody sees it.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Bigotry tries to keep truth safe in its hand
with a grip that kills it.
- Rabindranath Tagore
All truth passes through three stages:
First, it is ridiculed;
Second, it is violently opposed;
Third, it is accepted as self-evident.
- Arthur Schopenhauer
I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love
will have the final word in reality.
That is why right, temporarily defeated,
is stronger than evil triumphant.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Men occasionally stumble over the truth,
but most of them pick themselves up
and hurry off as if nothing had happened.
- Winston Churchill
Doubt is the vestibule which we all must pass through
before we can enter the temple of truth.
- Osho
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.