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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny New Quotes
Funny Quotes about New

Let these funny New Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

Take time to play!
Ask for what you want.
Laugh.
Live loudly.
Be avid.
Learn a new thing.
Be Yourself!
- Mary Anne Radmacher

I have a new philosophy.
I'm only going to dread one day at a time.
- Charles M. Schulz

Here's a toast to your new bride who has everything a girl
could want in her life, except for good taste in men.
- Anonymous

New Yorkers love it when you spill your guts out there.
Spill your guts at Wimbledon and they make you stop and clean it up.
- Jimmy Carter


 

I don't think the intelligence reports are all that hot.
Some days I get more out of the New York Times.
- John F. Kennedy

Beware of all enterprises that require a new set of clothes.
- Henry David Thoreau

A New Year's resolution is something that
goes in one Year and out the other.
- Anonymous


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Books serve to show a man
that those original thoughts of his
aren't very new at all.
- Abraham Lincoln

I love to shop after a bad relationship.
I don't know. I buy a new outfit
and it makes me feel better. It just does.
Sometimes I see a really great outfit,
I'll break up with someone on purpose.
- Rita Rudner

New York City is a great monument
to the power of money and greed...
a race for rent.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

A person who never made a mistake
never tried anything new.
- Albert Einstein

I was so jazzed about sobering up
and starting a new life;
I had to stop at a bar
to get a drink just to calm down.
- the television series Glee

One of the greatest pains to human nature is the pain of a new idea.
- Walter Bagehot

I've developed a new philosophy...
I only dread one day at a time.
- the character Charlie Brown in Charles M. Schulz' Peanuts comic

I'm going to go in the bathroom and scream.
I'll be out in a minute.
- the Woody Allen movie What's New Pussycat

Society is always taken by surprise
at any new example of common sense.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

One does not discover new lands without consenting
to lose sight of the shore for a very long time.
- Andre Gide

Try a new perspective on diversity.
Across the country and around the world,
we are all one.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Another Sunrise, Another New Beginning.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned,
so as to have the life that is waiting for us.
The old skin has to be shed before the new one can come.
- Joseph Campbell

Celebrate endings - for they precede new beginnings.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

With the new day comes new strength and new thoughts.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

I make it a policy to try never to
make a complete idiot of myself twice in the same way.
After all, there's always all kinds of new ways
to make a complete idiot of myself.
Why repeat the old ones?
- Margot Dalton

If the new American father feels bewildered and even defeated,
let him take comfort from the fact that whatever he
does in any fathering situation has a fifty percent chance of being right.
- Bill Cosby

You are never too old to set another goal
or to dream a new dream.
- C. S. Lewis

Move out of your comfort zone. You can only
grow if you are willing to feel awkward and
uncomfortable when you try something new.
- Brian Tracy

Man's mind, once stretched by a new idea,
never regains its original dimensions.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

What old people say you cannot do,
you try and find that you can.
Old deeds for old people, and new deeds for new.
- Henry David Thoreau

A new command I give you: Love one another.
As I have loved you, so you must love one another.
- Jesus of Nazareth (John 13:34)

A ship in port is safe,
but that's not what ships are built for.
Sail out to sea and do new things.
- Grace Hopper

Old deeds for old people, and new deeds for new.
- Henry David Thoreau

Mostly, it is human to dislike surprises -
often with great intensity.
Be open to new ways;
sometimes newness just knocks on our door;
welcome it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Nay, be a Columbus to whole new
continents and worlds within you,
opening new channels, not of trade, but of thought.
- Henry David Thoreau

Falling out of love is very enlightening.
For a short while you see the world with new eyes.
- Iris Murdoch

Peace is a daily, a weekly, a monthly process,
gradually changing opinions,
slowly eroding old barriers,
quietly building new structures.
- John F. Kennedy

You cannot discover new oceans unless
you have the courage to lose site of the shore.
- Anonymous

Incite a riot of new ideas.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Though no one can go back and make a brand new start,
anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.
- Carl Bard

Continuity gives us roots; change gives us branches,
letting us stretch and grow and reach new heights.
- Pauline R. Kezer

Give me your tired, your poor,
your huddled masses yearning to breathe free.
- written on the Statue of Liberty in New York harbor

Be a Columbus to whole new continents and worlds within you,
opening new channels, not of trade, but of thought.
- Henry David Thoreau

Every generation laughs at the old fashions,
but follows religiously the new.
- Henry David Thoreau

The human mind treats a new idea the way the body
treats a strange protein; it rejects it.
- Peter Medawar

In order to discover new lands,
one must be willing to lose sight
of the shore for a very long time.
- Anonymous

Whoever is new to power is always harsh.
- Aeschylus

To kill an error is as good a service as,
and sometimes even better than,
the establishing of a new truth or fact.
- Charles Darwin

Questioning cultural norms opens new vistas of happiness and purpose.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I love short trips to New York; to me it is the finest three-day town on earth.
- James Cameron

When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle.
Then I realised that the Lord doesn't work that way
so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me.
- Emo Philips

He that will not apply new remedies must expect new evils;
for time is the greatest innovator.
- Francis Bacon

The willingness to learn new skills is very high.
- Angela Merkel

Sometimes new love comes between old friends.
Sometimes the best love was the one that was always there.
- Anonymous

To raise new questions, new possibilities,
to regard old problems from a new angle,
requires creative imagination and marks real advance in science.
- Albert Einstein

I've got a new invention.
It's a revolving bowl for tired goldfish.
- Lefty Gomez

Fourscore and seven years ago
our fathers brought forth on this continent,
a new nation, conceived in Liberty,
and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal.
- Abraham Lincoln

France is delighted at this new opportunity to show
the world that when one has the will one can succeed
in joining peoples who have been brought close by history.
- Francois Mitterrand

Let every day be the first day
of the rest of your life,
but especially let today be a new beginning.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

We're entering a new world in which data may be more important than software.
- Tim O'Reilly

Each friend represents a world in us,
a world possibly not born until they arrive,
and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.
- Anais Nin

Making duplicate copies and computer printouts of things
no one wanted even one of in the first place is giving
America a new sense of purpose.
- Andy Rooney

The voyage of discovery is not in seeking new landscapes
but in having new eyes.
- Marcel Proust

We shall require a substantially
new manner of thinking
if mankind is to survive.
- Albert Einstein

I think there is a new awareness in this 21st century
that design is as important to where and how we live as it is for museums,
concert halls and civic buildings.
- Daniel Libeskind

Home computers are being called upon to perform many new functions,
including the consumption of homework formerly eaten by the dog.
- Doug Larson

To think that the new economy is over is like somebody
in London in 1830 saying the entire industrial revolution
is over because some textile manufacturers in Manchester went broke.
- Alvin Toffler

When a man opens a car door for his wife,
it's either a new car or a new wife.
- Prince Philip

I am one of those who think like Nobel,
that humanity will draw more good than evil from new discoveries.
- Marie Curie

Today, try something you have never tried before.
Perhaps just a food that is new to you -
perhaps a whole new way of living.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Every great film should seem new every time you see it.
- Roger Ebert

Old is the new new.
- Anonymous

I say beware of all enterprises that require new clothes,
and not rather a new wearer of clothes.
- Henry David Thoreau


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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.