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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Floods Quotes
Funny Quotes about Floods

Let these funny Floods Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

God has cared for these trees,
saved them from drought, disease, avalanches,
and a thousand tempests and floods.
But he cannot save them from fools.
- John Muir

We must build dikes of courage
to hold back the flood of fear.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

What is the appropriate behavior for a man or a woman
in the midst of this world,
where each person is clinging to his piece of debris?
What's the proper salutation between people
as they pass each other in this flood?
- The Buddha

The River of Life has no judgments.
The River flows with no concept of good and bad - right and wrong.
The fields and dreams of men may be nourished by the River of Life,
or flooded and covered with silt, and the River just flows.
Men may catch fish and live on the River of Life,
or they may founder in a storm and drown, and the River just flows.
The River of Life is timeless.
It is not unchanging, but it is timeless,
and it changes in its own time.
The River of Life knows no obstacles.
The River can cut through solid rock - in its own time.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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Do not speak to me of rules.
This is war! This is not a game of cricket!
- from the movie The Bridge On The River Kwai

Hitch a Ride on the River of Life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The River of Life has no meaning,
no good, no bad, no better, no worse,
no love, no hate, no fear, no anger, no joy.
The River of Life has no judgment, no expectation.
The River of Life just IS.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


 

As many raindrops join to form a great river of water,
many souls join their highest intent to form
the river of evolved consciousness.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Talk not of the river or lake
To those who have looked on the sea.
- Ella Wheeler Wilcox

The River of Life flows eternally,
with infinite strength,
but with no convictions.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The River of Life has no judgments.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The River of Life is timeless.
It is not unchanging, but it is timeless,
and it changes in its own time.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The River of Life flows - and all else is our drama.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The River of Life can cut through solid rock - in its own time.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

There is nothing to do.
There is nothing to say.
There is nothing to think.
There is nothing to feel.
The River of Life just flows.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Sometimes, if you stand on the bottom rail of a bridge
and lean over to watch the river slipping slowly away beneath you,
you will suddenly know everything there is to be known.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

The River of Life knows no obstacles.
The River can cut through solid rock - in its own time.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The River of Life is the source of all joy -
and the source of all sorrow.
Yet the River has no joy -
and the River has no sorrow.
The River is just the River.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The River of Life has no expectations
and makes no assumptions.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

One can flow harmoniously with the River -
or one can struggle fearfully against the River -
and the River just flows.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I choose to flow with the River of Life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Personally, I have fond memories of playing
on slippery rocks on the banks of a rushing river
as a child and hitchhiking in college.
To those who say, "But times are different now,"
I reply that statistically life is much safer now
than in the 1950s, with regard to both crime and accidents.
What has changed is our attitudes.
In those years, a broken leg from falling off a swing
or the back of a tractor was just part of childhood -
an excuse for gathering autographs.
Today that broken leg would be a source
of outrage and probably lawsuits.
I long for a simpler time when life was taken less seriously.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

There is nothing to do - and the River flows.
There is nothing to say - and the River flows.
There is nothing to think - and the River flows.
There is nothing to feel - and the River flows.
The River flows - and all else is our drama.
The River flows - and all else is our invention.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The River of Life has no meaning, no good, no bad,
no better, no worse, no love, no hate, no fear, no anger, no joy.
The River of Life has no judgment, no expectation.
The River of Life just IS. There is nothing to do.
There is nothing to say.
There is nothing to think.
There is nothing to feel.
The River just flows. The River is the source of all nourishment -
the source of all obstacles.
The River is the source of all life - the source of all death.
The River is the source of all joy - and the source of all sorrow.
Yet the River has no joy - and the River has no sorrow.
The River is just the River.
One can flow harmoniously with the River -
or one can struggle fearfully against the River -
and the River just flows.
One can accept the River - or one can deny the River -
and the River just flows.
One can worship the River of Life - or one can curse the River of Life -
and the River just flows. There is nothing to do - and the River flows.
There is nothing to say - and the River flows.
There is nothing to think - and the River flows.
There is nothing to feel - and the River flows.
The River flows - and all else is our drama.
The River flows - and all else is our invention.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The River of Life flows without emotion.
The River surges. The River quiets.
The River overflows its banks. The River dries to a trickle.
The River swirls and storms. The River becomes calm.
The River runs clear. The River runs dark with silt.
The River is indifferent to what benefit
or what harm is caused by its water.
The River is the River, and that is all there is to it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand

If you are not one of us, you are one of them.
- the movie The Matrix (1999)

It's not the size of the dog in the fight,
it's the size of the fight in the dog.
- Mark Twain

"It's not that important,
don't worry about it" is the answer,
now what was the question?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer

Live life on the edge, not with an edge.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Marriage is a fine institution -
but I'm not ready for an institution yet.
- Mae West

I'm not talking about lust.
A woman in lust wants chocolate.
A woman in love wants diamonds.
- the movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days

Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire

Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed.
But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops.
Uh, depending on the breaks.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove

Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.
- Will Rogers

Personally, I'm always ready to learn,
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill

Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
- Albert Einstein

DON'T get officious.
You're not yourself when you're officious -
That is the curse of a government job.
- the movie Harold and Maude (1971)

If at first you don't succeed,
skydiving is not for you.
- Anonymous

The key is, to not think of death as an end,
but as more of a very effective way to cut down on your expenses.
- the movie Love and Death

One does not leave a convivial party before closing time.
- Winston Churchill

I'm not used to feeling so human.
Is it always like this?
- Edward, from Twilight Saga by Stephenie Meyer

Yeah I called her up. She gave me a bunch of ...
about me not listening to her, or something.
I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.
- the movie Dumb & Dumber (1994)

No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous

I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln

Two things are infinite:
the universe and human stupidity;
and I'm not sure about the universe.
- Albert Einstein

Damn it boss, I like you too much not to say it.
You've got everything except one thing: madness!
- the movie Zorba The Greek

Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein

The most important words in the English language
are not "I love you" but "It's benign."
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel

Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again.
- Robert A. Heinlein

When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.
- Mark Twain

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous

In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland

I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
- Anonymous

Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West

Do not laugh much or often or unrestrainedly.
- Epictetus

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our Light, not our Darkness, that most frightens us.
- Marianne Williamson

Do not bite at the bait of pleasure,
till you know there is no hook beneath it.
- Thomas Jefferson

The trouble with the world is not
that people know too little,
but that they know so many things that ain't so.
- Mark Twain

People who say it cannot be done should not
interrupt those who are doing it.
- George Bernard Shaw

Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth
until the hour of separation.
- Khalil Gibran

Though I am a servant, I am not your servant.
- Ursula K. Le Guin

Only two things are infinite,
the universe and human stupidity,
and I'm not sure about the former.
- Albert Einstein

The mind is not a vessel to be filled
but a fire to be kindled.
- Plutarch

Belief is not the beginning but the end of all knowledge.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

The objection to Puritans is not that
they try to make us think as they do,
but that they try to make us do as they think.
- H. L. Mencken

A ship in harbor is safe -
but that is not what ships are for.
- John A. Shedd

Am I not destroying my enemies
when I make friends of them?
- Abraham Lincoln

I'm sure we all agree that we ought to love one another
and I know there are people in the world
that do not love their fellow human beings
and I HATE people like that.
- Tom Lehrer


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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