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Let these funny Diseases Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
We are a puny and fickle folk.
Avarice, hesitation, and following are our diseases.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
All diseases run into one - old age.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
One of the greatest diseases is to be nobody to anybody.
- Mother Teresa
We return thanks to our mother,
the earth, which sustains us.
We return thanks to the rivers and streams
which supply us with water.
We return thanks to all herbs, which furnish medicines
for the cure of our diseases.
We return thanks to the corn, and to her sisters,
the beans and squashes, which give us life.
We return thanks to the bushes and trees,
which provide us with fruit.
We return thanks to the wind,
which, moving the air, has banished diseases.
We return thanks to the moon and the stars,
which have given us their light when the sun was gone.
We return thanks to our grandfather He-no,
that he has protected his grandchildren from witches and reptiles,
and has given us his rain.
We return thanks to the sun,
that he has looked upon the earth with a beneficent eye.
Lastly, we return thanks to the Great Spirit,
in whom is embodied all goodness,
and who directs all things for the good of his children.
- Iroquois traditional
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I feel coming on a strange disease - humility.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
Love is a grave mental disease.
- Plato
God has cared for these trees,
saved them from drought, disease, avalanches,
and a thousand tempests and floods.
But he cannot save them from fools.
- John Muir
Nationalism is an infantile disease. It is the measles of mankind.
- Albert Einstein
The biggest disease today is not leprosy or tuberculosis,
but rather the feeling of being unwanted.
- Mother Teresa
Let us seek to invoke the wonders of science ...
explore the stars, conquer the deserts,
eradicate disease, tap the ocean depths,
and encourage the arts and commerce.
- John F. Kennedy
Jealousy is a disease, love is a healthy condition.
The immature mind often mistakes one for the other,
or assumes that the greater the love, the greater the jealousy -
in fact, they're almost incompatible;
one emotion hardly leaves room for the other.
Both at once can produce unbearable turmoil.
- Robert Heinlein
Every human being is the author of his own health or disease.
- The Buddha
Aggression unopposed becomes a contagious disease.
- Jimmy Carter
Life is an organic whole. The basic problems of the people -
poverty, ignorance, disease and civic inertia - interlock.
To address one problem, we must address all.
Hence our emphasis on an integrated program
of livelihood, education, health and self-government.
- Jimmy Yen
It is not our place to know the mind of God.
Spirit knows what is best in the long run -
best for each of us individually,
and best for humanity as a whole.
This is often very difficult to accept
when we see war and disease in the world
and experience physical and emotional suffering
in ourselves, our family, and our friends.
I consider this belief in God's infinite power
and ultimate wisdom to be the true test of faith.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I'm awash in self-contempt!
- the Woody Allen movie Celebrity
I'm going to go in the bathroom and scream.
I'll be out in a minute.
- the Woody Allen movie What's New Pussycat
I feel the need to express something,
but I don't know what it is I want to express.
- the movie Interiors
Do you feel stuck?
Whether in a project, a job, a relationship,
or some other situation,
there is a time for perseverance,
and a time for letting go and moving on.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Really I feel less keen about the Army every day.
I think the Church would suit me better.
- Winston Churchill
Whenever I feel the need to exercise,
I lie down until it goes away.
- Robert Maynard Hutchins
It's so sweet, I feel like my teeth
are rotting when I listen to the radio.
- Bono
I'm saving that rocker for the day
when I feel as old as I really am.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
The only advantage of not being too good a housekeeper
is that your guests are so pleased
to feel how very much better they are.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
Although personally I am quite content with existing explosives,
I feel we must not stand in the path of improvement.
- Winston Churchill
It has always been a mystery to me
how men can feel themselves honored
by the humiliation of their fellow beings.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
I love to shop after a bad relationship.
I don't know. I buy a new outfit
and it makes me feel better. It just does.
Sometimes I see a really great outfit,
I'll break up with someone on purpose.
- Rita Rudner
People will forget what you said,
people will forget what you did,
but people will never forget
how you made them feel.
- Maya Angelou
Move out of your comfort zone. You can only
grow if you are willing to feel awkward and
uncomfortable when you try something new.
- Brian Tracy
I am a Passionate Observer of Life.
I See the events, feel the emotions,
and recognize the difference.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Confession of errors is like a broom
which sweeps away the dirt
and leaves the surface brighter and clearer.
I feel stronger for confession.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy
is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet,
alone with the heavens, nature and God.
Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be.
- Anne Frank
We have nearly complete misunderstanding between
people of different faiths in Lake Wobegon,
and that's probably one reason why we get along so very well.
It's when you are trying to convince another person to think
the same way that you do that there is
friction and trouble between people.
But when you feel that the other person is
dumber than dirt, too dumb for words -
why waste your breath - you get along pretty well.
There's no bond between people that's quite so strong as
when people each feel slightly superior towards the other one.
- Garrison Keillor
Never say goodbye when you still want to try,
never give up when you still feel you can't take it.
Never say you don't love the person anymore
when you can't let go.
- Anonymous
Every time you don't follow your inner guidance,
you feel a loss of energy, a loss of power,
a sense of spiritual deadness.
- Shakti Gawain
Few is the number of those
who think with their own mind
and feel with their own heart.
- Albert Einstein
Everything we say, do, think, and feel
is a product of our personal history
and the collective history of humankind.
Our name for these histories is "prejudice."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is full of beauty. Notice it.
Notice the bumble bee, the small child,
and the smiling faces.
Smell the rain, and feel the wind.
Live your life to the fullest potential,
and fight for your dreams.
- Ashley Smith
Most truths are so naked
that people feel sorry for them
and cover them up,
at least a little bit.
- Edward R. Murrow
Few are those who see with their own eyes
and feel with their own hearts.
- Albert Einstein
I'm half alive but I feel mostly dead.
- Jewel
I'm so glad I never feel important, it does complicate life!
- Eleanor Roosevelt
Feel the fear and do it anyway.
- Susan Jeffers
"How do you spell 'love'?" asked Piglet.
"You don't spell it...you feel it." answered Pooh.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
Farewell My Friend
It was beautiful as long as it lasted
The journey of my life.
I have no regrets whatsoever
save the pain I'll leave behind.
Those dear hearts who love and care...
And the strings pulling at the heart and soul...
The strong arms that held me up
When my own strength let me down.
At every turning of my life
I came across good friends,
Friends who stood by me,
Even when the time raced me by.
Farewell, farewell my friends
I smile and bid you goodbye.
No, shed no tears for I need them not
All I need is your smile.
If you feel sad do think of me
for that's what I'll like
when you live in the hearts
of those you love, remember then
you never die.
- Gitanjali Ghei
Do what you feel in your heart to be right.
You'll be criticized anyway.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
When you are offended at any man's fault,
turn to yourself and study your own failings.
Then you will forget your anger.
- Epictetus
We humans feel an instinctive need to know
what is coming next - what we can count upon.
We fear change - even the most positive change.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
It hurts to love someone
and not be loved in return,
but what is more painful is to love
someone and never find the courage
to let that person know how you feel.
- Anonymous
When you feel worried and depressed,
consciously form a smile on your face and act upbeat
until the happy feeling becomes genuine.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Love is saying "I feel differently,"
instead of "You're wrong."
- Anonymous
When you feel the need to hurry,
remember that everything in life is a CHOICE.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If I mayn't tell you what I feel,
what is the use of a friend?
- William Makepeace Thackeray
If you ask a stupid question, you may feel stupid;
if you don't ask a stupid question, you remain stupid.
- Tony Rothman
We judge ourselves by what we feel capable of doing,
while others judge us by what we have already done.
- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Reality is what you believe it to be.
It's what you put your thought and energy into,
because your hands physically manifest thought.
So your world becomes what you feel and what you think.
- Jewel
Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions.
Small people always do that,
but the really great make you feel that
you, too, can become great.
- Mark Twain
Be an Observer of Life.
See the events, feel the emotions,
and recognize the difference.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Words make you think a thought.
Music makes you feel a feeling.
A song makes you feel a thought.
- E. Y. Harburg
People sort themselves into groups
of happy people and unhappy people
through two different, but complementary mechanisms,
influence and affinity.
I influence those around me
with my emotional state, either happy or unhappy.
At the same time, I feel an affinity
for others who are like me in some way -
in this case by sharing my emotional outlook on life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Whenever I hear anyone arguing for slavery,
I feel a strong impulse to see it tried on him personally.
- Abraham Lincoln
I choose to feel supremely happy at this very moment.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Do what you feel in your heart to be right -
for you'll be criticized anyway.
You'll be damned if you do, and damned if you don't.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
If we don't feel appreciated, we don't feel loved.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Know the power of perspective.
Be a passionate observer of life.
See the events, feel the emotions,
and recognize the difference.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If I feel depressed I will sing.
If I feel sad I will laugh.
If I feel ill I will double my labor.
If I feel fear I will plunge ahead.
If I feel inferior I will wear new garments.
If I feel uncertain I will raise my voice.
If I feel poverty I will think of wealth to come.
If I feel incompetent I will think of past success.
If I feel insignificant I will remember my goals.
Today I will be the master of my emotions.
- Og Mandino
Home is not a structure, but the place that we feel comfortable -
the place we belong - the place of our loved ones.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The hardest of all, is learning to be
a well of affection, and not a fountain,
to show them that we love them,
not when we feel like it, but when they do.
- Nan Fairbrother
Loneliness is not what it seems.
One does not feel lonely because one is alone,
but because of a feeling of lack -
a feeling that something is missing.
Loneliness is essentially independent
of how many other humans are around.
It has much more to do with one's self-esteem -
one's sense of inherent worth.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I get bored very easily, ...
I have a voracious appetite and I do not feel alive
if I'm repeating something I'm good at.
So I'm always looking for new challenges.
- Jewel
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.