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Let these funny Deride Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
The truth is incontrovertible,
malice may attack it, ignorance may deride it,
but in the end; there it is.
- Winston Churchill
It is a truth universally acknowledged that
when one part of your life starts going okay,
another falls spectacularly to pieces.
- the movie Bridget Jones Diary
Truth is beautiful, without doubt; but so are lies.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The lawyer's truth is not Truth,
but consistency or a consistent expediency.
- Henry David Thoreau
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The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.
- Oscar Wilde
Truth is stranger than fiction,
but that is because Fiction is obliged
to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.
- Mark Twain
Tell the truth, or someone will tell it for you.
- Stephanie Klein
A remark generally hurts in proportion to its truth.
- Will Rogers
If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
- Mark Twain
If you're going to tell people the truth,
be funny or they'll kill you.
- Billy Wilder
Always speak the truth,
think before you speak,
and write it down afterwards.
- Lewis Carroll
All people know the same truth.
Our lives consist of how we chose to distort it.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
Man will occasionally stumble over the truth,
but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.
- Winston Churchill
Strike an average between what a woman thinks of her husband
a month before she marries him
and what she thinks of him a year afterward,
and you will have the truth about him.
- H. L. Mencken
My way of joking is telling the truth;
that is the funniest joke in the world.
- George Bernard Shaw
By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
- George Carlin
Bad taste is simply saying the truth before it should be said.
- Mel Brooks
The rarest quality in an epitaph is truth.
- Henry David Thoreau
If you are out to describe the truth,
leave elegance to the tailor.
- Albert Einstein
Truth is a tendency.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
Man is least himself when he talks in his own person.
Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.
- Oscar Wilde
Use the power of your word
in the direction of truth and love.
- don Miguel Ruiz
The water in a vessel is sparkling;
the water in the sea is dark.
The small truth has words which are clear;
the great truth has great silence.
- Rabindranath Tagore
When a thing is funny, search it for a hidden truth.
- George Bernard Shaw
The truth. It is a beautiful and terrible thing,
and should be treated with caution.
- J. K. Rowling
Soon we'll be out amid the cold world's strife.
Soon we'll be sliding down the razor blade of life.
But as we go our sordid sep'rate ways,
We shall ne'er forget thee, thou golden college days.
Hearts full of youth,
Hearts full of truth,
Six parts gin to one part vermouth.
- Tom Lehrer - song: Bright College Days,
album: An Evening Wasted With Tom Lehrer
The words of truth are always paradoxical.
- Lao Tzu
A man must be both stupid and uncharitable
who believes there is no virtue or truth but on his own side.
- Joseph Addison
Our actions are constrained by fear of reprisal,
but our dreams reveal our true character.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Having a personal opinion is great.
Believing that one's personal opinion is absolute truth
leads to most of the world's troubles.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Intense feeling too often obscures the truth.
- Harry S. Truman
Truth is absolute, but only to one person.
My truth is absolute to me, and your truth is absolute to you.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Every mind must make its choice
between truth and repose.
It cannot have both.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
I am sorry to think that you do not get a man's
most effective criticism until you provoke him.
Severe truth is expressed with some bitterness.
- Henry David Thoreau
We take refuge in pride,
because we are afraid to tell the truth to ourselves.
- Kakuzo Okakura
When you are sorrowful, look again in your heart,
and you shall see that in truth
you are weeping for that which has been your delight.
- Khalil Gibran
The goal of education is the advancement of knowledge
and the dissemination of truth.
- John F. Kennedy
We are not afraid to follow truth
wherever it may lead,
nor to tolerate any error
so long as reason is left free to combat it.
- Thomas Jefferson
I am committed to truth, not consistency.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Fiction reveals truth that reality obscures.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
A lie travels round the world while
truth is putting her boots on.
- French Proverb
(also attributed to Mark Twain, Winston Churchill, and others)
Even the truth, when believed, is a lie.
You must experience the truth, not believe it.
- Werner Erhard
If you seek truth, you will not seek
victory by dishonorable means,
and if you find truth, you will become invincible.
- Epictetus
The truth is a snare:
you cannot have it, without being caught.
You cannot have the truth
in such a way that you catch it,
but only in such a way that it catches you.
- Soren Kierkegaard
All the religions of the world,
while they may differ in other respects,
unitedly proclaim that nothing lives in this world but Truth.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Whoever is careless with the truth in small matters
cannot be trusted with important matters.
- Albert Einstein
The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement.
But the opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth.
- Niels Bohr
This is my wish for you:
Comfort on difficult days,
Smiles when sadness intrudes,
Rainbows to follow the clouds,
Laughter to kiss your lips,
Sunsets to warm your heart,
Hugs when spirits sag,
Beauty for your eyes to see,
Friendships to brighten your being,
Faith so that you can believe,
Confidence for when you doubt,
Courage to know yourself,
Patience to accept the truth,
Love to complete your life.
- Anonymous
The false can never grow into truth by growing in power.
- Rabindranath Tagore
Even if you are a minority of one,
the truth is the truth.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Love is like the truth,
sometimes it prevails,
sometimes it hurts.
- Victor M. Garcia Jr.
Truth is the property of no individual
but is the treasure of all men.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Truth is handsomer than the affectation of love.
Your goodness must have some edge to it, else it is none.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
We should not pretend to understand the world
only by the intellect.
The judgment of the intellect
is only part of the truth.
- Carl Jung
There are two mistakes one can make along the road to truth
- not going all the way and not starting.
- The Buddha
I believe that it is better to tell the truth than a lie.
I believe it is better to be free than to be a slave.
And I believe it is better to know than to be ignorant.
- H.L. Mencken
With manners comes insincerity.
Truth is sometimes difficult.
- Bono
Truth is not defined by
how many people believe something.
Ask. Question. Think.
Decide - for yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
We must be ready to learn from one another,
not claiming that we alone possess all truth
and that somehow we have a corner on God.
- Archbishop Desmond Tutu
Knowledge of the Truth makes us free
by aligning us with that which was never bound.
- Ernest Holmes
Everything deep is also simple
and can be reproduced simply
as long as its reference
to the whole truth is maintained.
But what matters is not what is witty
but what is true.
- Albert Schweitzer
I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love
will have the final word in reality.
That is why right, temporarily defeated,
is stronger than evil triumphant.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
The search for truth is more precious than its possession.
- Albert Einstein
Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact.
Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth.
- Marcus Aurelius
About most subjects, there is not "The Truth;"
there is merely one's personal truth.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Truth has no special time of its own.
Its hour is now - always.
- Albert Schweitzer
Mistakes are, after all, the foundations of truth,
and if a man does not know what a thing is,
it is at least an increase in knowledge
if he knows what it is not.
- Carl Jung
Truth is always in harmony with herself,
and is not concerned chiefly to reveal the justice
that may consist with wrong-doing.
- Henry David Thoreau
There are only two mistakes one can make along the road to truth;
not going all the way, and not starting.
- The Buddha
A nation that is afraid to let its people
judge the truth and falsehood in an open market
is a nation that is afraid of its people.
- John F. Kennedy
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.