Enter one or two keywords to search these Funny Quotes.

Hint: keep it simple, like life twain



Facebook share   Tweet This   Email this

Funny Quotes about Life
Funny Quotes about Life | Funny Love Quotes | Links | About
Search:   A-   B-   Ca-   Co-   D-   E-   F-   G-   H-    I-    J-K-L   M-   N-O   Pa-   Pr-   Q-R   Sa-   Sk-   T-   U-V-W-X-Y-Z


Get a Humorous, Yet Insightful, Quote of the Day each day by email.
Follow funny-quotes-life.com by Email:


Men in general judge more from
by Niccolo Machiavelli

Men in general judge more from
appearances than from reality. All
men have eyes, but few have
the gift of penetration.
- Niccolo Machiavelli

Men ought either to be indulged or utterly destroyed,
for if you merely offend them, they take vengeance,
but if you injure them greatly, they are unable to retaliate,
so that the injury done to a man
ought to be such that vengeance cannot be feared.
- Niccolo Machiavelli

Women want mediocre men,
and men are working to be as mediocre as possible.
- Margaret Mead

A man likes his wife to be
just clever enough to appreciate his cleverness,
and just stupid enough to admire it.
- Israel Zangwill


Get a Funny Quote of the Day each day by email or in your feed reader.

 Subscribe in a reader -- or
Enter your email address:




Delivered by FeedBurner


Here's a toast to your new bride who has everything a girl
could want in her life, except for good taste in men.
- Anonymous

Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein

It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel


 

Men always want to be a woman's first love -
women like to be a man's last romance.
- Oscar Wilde

I think men who have a pierced ear
are better prepared for marriage.
They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
- Rita Rudner

My plan was to kiss her with every lip on my face.
- the movie Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid

History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely
only after they have exhausted all other alternatives.
- Abba Eban

Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition.
- Marilyn Monroe

It is an interesting question how far men
would retain their relative rank
if they were divested of their clothes.
- Henry David Thoreau

Thank God men cannot fly, and lay waste
the sky as well as the earth.
- Henry David Thoreau

She's been diagnosed as a paranoid hypochondriac.
Doctors think she may be faking.
- the movie Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid

Few men have virtue to withstand the highest bidder.
- George Washington

It has always been a mystery to me
how men can feel themselves honored
by the humiliation of their fellow beings.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

The greatest deception men suffer is from their own opinions.
- Leonardo da Vinci

Force always attracts men of low morality.
- Albert Einstein

The means by which we live have outdistanced
the ends for which we live.
Our scientific power has outrun our spiritual power.
We have guided missiles and misguided men.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

In critical moments men sometimes see
exactly what they wish to see.
- the character Spock of the television series Star Trek

Most men lead lives of quiet desperation
and go to the grave with the song still in them.
- Henry David Thoreau

I begin with the principle that all men are bores.
Surely no one will prove himself
so great a bore as to contradict me in this.
- Soren Kierkegaard

I don't advise a haircut, man.
All hairdressers are in the employment of the government.
Hairs are your aerials.
They pick up signals from the cosmos,
and transmit them directly into the brain.
This is the reason bald-headed men are uptight.
- the movie Withnail & I

Men have become the tools of their tools.
- Henry David Thoreau

If God listened to the prayers of men,
all men would quickly have perished:
for they are forever praying for evil against one another.
- Epicurus

In every society some men are born to rule,
and some to advise.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Our scientific power has outrun our spiritual power.
We have guided missiles and misguided men.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Nearly all men can stand adversity,
but if you want to test a man's character, give him power.
- Abraham Lincoln

While civilization has been improving our houses,
it has not equally improved
the men who are to inhabit them.
It has created palaces, but it was
not so easy to create noblemen and kings.
- Henry David Thoreau

The only thing necessary for evil to triumph
is for enough good men to do nothing.
- Edmund Burke

Tolerance is the first principle of community;
it is the spirit which conserves
the best that all men think.
- Helen Keller

When It's Darkest, Men See the Stars.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation.
- Henry David Thoreau

The revelation of thought takes men
out of servitude into freedom.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

A person is smart. People are dumb,
panicky dangerous animals and you know it.
Fifteen hundred years ago everybody knew
the Earth was the center of the universe.
Five hundred years ago,
everybody knew the Earth was flat,
and fifteen minutes ago,
you knew that humans were alone on this planet.
Imagine what you'll know tomorrow.
- the movie Men in Black

One machine can do the work of fifty ordinary men.
No machine can do the work of one extraordinary man.
- Elbert Hubbard

My heart bleeds at the death of every one of our gallant men.
- Robert E. Lee

Every kind of peaceful cooperation among men
is primarily based on mutual trust
and only secondarily on institutions
such as courts of justice and police.
- Albert Einstein

It is not work that kills men; it is worry.
Worry is rust upon the blade.
- Henry Ward Beecher

We who lived in concentration camps can remember the men
who walked through the huts comforting others,
giving away their last piece of bread...
They offer sufficient proof that everything
can be taken from a man but one thing:
to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances,
to choose one's own way.
- Viktor E. Frankl

I look only to the good qualities of men.
Not being faultless myself,
I won't presume to probe into the faults of others.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Who never walks save where he sees
men's tracks, makes no discoveries.
- J. G. Holland

Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully
as when they do it from religious conviction.
- Blaise Pascal

The problems of the world cannot possibly
be solved by skeptics or cynics
whose horizons are limited by the obvious realities.
We need men who can dream of things that never were.
- John F. Kennedy

It takes time to persuade men to do even
what is for their own good.
- Thomas Jefferson

Truth is the property of no individual
but is the treasure of all men.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Men are born to succeed, not to fail.
- Henry David Thoreau

In the long run, men hit only what they aim at.
Therefore, they had better aim at something high.
- Henry David Thoreau

Great men or men of great gifts
you shall easily find,
but symmetrical men never.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

The slavery of fear had made men afraid to think.
But such is the irresistible nature of truth,
that all it asks, and all it wants, is the liberty of appearing.
- Thomas Paine, Rights of Man, 1791

Women must try to do things as men have tried.
When they fail their failure must be
but a challenge to others.
- Amelia Earhart

The expert in battle seeks his victory
from strategic advantage
and does not demand it from his men.
- Sun Tzu

Republicans are men of narrow vision,
who are afraid of the future.
- Jimmy Carter

Do not pray for easy lives.
Pray to be stronger men.
- John F. Kennedy

All free men, wherever they may live, are citizens of Berlin.
And therefore, as a free man, I take pride
in the words "Ich bin ein Berliner!"
- John F. Kennedy

An association of men who will not quarrel with one another
is a thing which has never yet existed,
from the greatest confederacy of nations
down to a town meeting or a vestry.
- Thomas Jefferson

More men fail through lack of purpose than lack of talent.
- Billy Sunday

The majority of men meet with failure
because of their lack of persistence
in creating new plans to take
the place of those which fail.
- Napoleon Hill

The law will never make a man free;
it is men who have got to make the law free.
- Henry David Thoreau

I have no ambition to govern men; it is a painful and thankless office.
- Thomas Jefferson

All men are children, and of one family.
The same tale sends them all to bed,
and wakes them in the morning.
- Henry David Thoreau

The heresy of one age becomes the orthodoxy of the next.
Mere tolerance has given place to a sentiment of brotherhood
between sincere men of all denominations.
- Helen Keller

Behind an able man there are always other able men.
- Chinese proverb

We the people are the rightful masters
of both Congress and the courts,
not to overthrow the Constitution
but to overthrow the men who pervert the Constitution.
- Abraham Lincoln

We will not be driven by fear into an age of unreason
if we dig deep in our history and remember
that we are not descended from fearful men,
not from men who feared to write, to speak,
to associate and to defend causes
which were for the moment unpopular.
- Edward R. Murrow

Trust men and they will be true to you;
treat them greatly and they will show themselves great.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

There is a natural aristocracy among men.
The grounds of this are virtue and talents.
- Thomas Jefferson

Many men go fishing all of their lives
without knowing that it is not fish they are after.
- Henry David Thoreau

Men have a respect for scholarship and learning
greatly out of proportion to the use they commonly serve.
- Henry David Thoreau

Instead of noblemen,
let us have noble villages of men.
- Henry David Thoreau


Thank you for visiting: Men in general judge more from by Niccolo Machiavelli.

Please sign up on the form below to receive
my Free Daily Inspiration - Daily Quotes email.

You can also search my large collection of Funny Quotes.

May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


Funny Quotes

 


All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.