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Let these funny Reap Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap,
but by the seeds that you plant.
- Robert Louis Stevenson
If you plan for a year, plant a seed.
If for ten years, plant a tree.
If for a hundred years, teach the people.
When you sow a seed once, you will reap a single harvest.
When you teach the people, you will reap a hundred harvests.
- Kuan Chung
As you sow, so shall you reap.
- Galatians 6:7
He who sows hurry reaps indigestion.
- Robert Louis Stevenson
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Who sows virtue reaps honor.
- Leonardo da Vinci
No good comes from hurrying.
- Yiddish Proverb
Life is best when I wish neither to hurry the future nor to slow it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
You're only here for a short visit.
Don't hurry. Don't worry.
And be sure to smell the flowers along the way.
- Walter Hagen
Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished.
- Lao Tzu
"Hurry up" ranks right up there with "you need to"
as a destroyer of our humanity.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Never be in a hurry; do everything quietly and in a calm spirit.
Do not lose your inner peace for anything whatsoever,
even if your whole world seems upset.
- Saint Francis de Sales
Rivers know this: there is no hurry. We shall get there some day.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
Don't hurry. Don't worry.
You're only here for a short visit.
So don't forget to stop and smell the roses.
- Walter Hagen
A mother is one to whom you hurry when you are troubled.
- Emily Dickinson
When you feel the need to hurry,
remember that everything in life is a CHOICE.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Most men pursue pleasure with such breathless haste
that they hurry past it.
- Soren Kierkegaard
Men occasionally stumble over the truth,
but most of them pick themselves up
and hurry off as if nothing had happened.
- Winston Churchill
We occasionally stumble over the truth
but most of us pick ourselves up and
hurry off as if nothing had happened.
- Winston Churchill
Know that life is most joyful when you
neither attempt to hurry the future nor to slow it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Patience is an ever present alternative
to the mind's endemic restlessness and impatience.
Scratch the surface of impatience and what you will find
lying beneath it, subtly or not so subtly, is anger.
It's the strong energy of not wanting things to be the way they are
and blaming someone (often yourself) or something for it.
This doesn't mean you can't hurry when you have to.
It is possible even to hurry patiently, mindfully,
moving fast because you have chosen to.
- Jon Kabat-Zinn
Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer
There's no reason to become alarmed,
and we hope you'll enjoy the rest of your flight.
By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?
- the movie Airplane!
Oh no, I can't do anything to the death.
Doctor's orders. You see, I have this ulcer condition,
and death is the worst thing for it.
- the movie Love and Death
A man's friendships are, like his will,
invalidated by marriage -
but they are also no less invalidated
by the marriage of his friends.
- Samuel Butler
One cannot have everything the way he would like it.
A man has no business to be depressed by a disappointment,
anyway; he ought to make up his mind to get even.
- Mark Twain
And you just gotta remember, Sparky -
no matter what they tell you - you can NEVER have too much sugar.
- the movie Michael (1996)
Marriage has no guarantees.
If that's what you're looking for,
go live with a car battery.
- Erma Bombeck
No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous
A honeymoon should be like a table:
four bare legs and no drawers.
- Anonymous
No one knows what's next, but everybody does it.
- George Carlin
No matter how much cats fight,
there always seem to be plenty of kittens.
- Abraham Lincoln
I have no fear of the gallows ... They're going to shoot me.
- the movie Love and Death
When I eventually met Mr. Right
I had no idea that his first name was Always.
- Rita Rudner
Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed.
But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops.
Uh, depending on the breaks.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove
No one can have a higher opinion of you than I have,
and I think you're a slimy, contemptible sewer rat!
- the movie The Great Mouse Detective
Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life, son.
- the movie National Lampoon's Animal House (1978)
Television has a real problem. They have no page two.
- Art Buchwald
When all think alike, no one is thinking very much.
- Walter Lippmann
There is no use whatsoever trying to help
people who do not help themselves.
You cannot push anyone up a ladder
unless he is willing to climb himself.
- Andrew Carnegie
Against logic there is no armor like ignorance.
- Laurence J. Peter
Every one desires to live long,
but no one would be old.
- Abraham Lincoln
The man who does not read good books
has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
- Mark Twain
Some people are so heavenly minded
that they are no earthly good.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
Do not bite at the bait of pleasure,
till you know there is no hook beneath it.
- Thomas Jefferson
An excellent man;
he has no enemies;
and none of his friends like him.
- Oscar Wilde
I once had a rose named after me
and I was very flattered.
But I was not pleased to read
the description in the catalogue:
no good in a bed, but fine up against a wall.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
Random chance seems to have operated in our favor ...
there was no deity involved.
- Spock character in the Star Trek television series
In theory there is no difference between theory and practice.
In practice there is.
- Yogi Berra
Some things will never seem adequate
no matter how hard we try.
- from the movie White Man's Burden
The way to silence religious disputes is to take no notice of them.
- Thomas Jefferson
I am no longer young enough to know everything.
- Oscar Wilde
No problem is so formidable that
you can't walk away from it.
- Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts
He who loves 50 people has 50 woes;
he who loves no one has no woes.
- The Buddha
Computers are like Old Testament gods;
lots of rules and no mercy.
- Joseph Campbell
As soon as someone is identified as an unsung hero,
he no longer is.
- George Carlin
Early in life I had to choose between honest arrogance
and hypocritical humility.
I chose the former and have seen no reason to change.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
Clothes make the man.
Naked people have little or no influence on society.
- Mark Twain
It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel
I begin with the principle that all men are bores.
Surely no one will prove himself
so great a bore as to contradict me in this.
- Soren Kierkegaard
You have no values. With you its all nihilism,
cynicism, sarcasm, and orgasm.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
There is no pleasure in having nothing to do;
the fun is in having lots to do and not doing it.
- Mary Wilson Little
He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.
- Oscar Wilde
Faced with the choice between changing one's mind
and proving that there is no need to do so,
almost everyone gets busy on the proof.
- John Kenneth Galbraith
There is no such thing as public opinion.
There is only published opinion.
- Winston Churchill
Experience keeps a dear school,
but fools will learn in no other.
- Benjamin Franklin
I find that principles have no real force
except when one is well fed.
- Mark Twain
The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears,
for there's no risk of accident for someone who's dead.
- Albert Einstein
Less is only more where more is no good.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
A clever man commits no minor blunders.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
The worst government is often the most moral.
One composed of cynics is often very tolerant and humane.
But when fanatics are on top there is no limit to oppression.
- H. L. Mencken
Principles have no real force except when one is well-fed.
- Mark Twain
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.