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Funny Illusion Quotes
Funny Quotes about Illusion

Let these funny Illusion Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists?
In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet.
- Woody Allen

Tradition is the illusion of permanence.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

There is an optical illusion about every person we meet.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

No illusion is more crucial than the illusion that
great success and huge money buy you immunity from
the common ills of mankind,
such as cars that won't start.
- Larry McMurtry


 

Love is the child of illusion and the parent of disillusion.
- Miguel de Unamuno

Losing an illusion makes you wiser than finding a truth.
- Ludwig Boerne

A system of morality which is based
on relative emotional values
is a mere illusion, a thoroughly vulgar conception
which has nothing sound in it and nothing true.
- Socrates


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Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.
- Albert Einstein

The greatest obstacle to discovery is not ignorance -
it is the illusion of knowledge.
- Daniel J. Boorstin

There are as many pillows of illusion
as flakes in a snow-storm.
We wake from one dream into another dream.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

The secret to film is that it's an illusion.
- George Lucas

We are here to awaken from the illusion of our separateness.
- Thich Nhat Hanh

Nothing is missing - Lack is an illusion.
We always have everything we truly need.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

We're born alone, we live alone, we die alone.
Only through our love and friendship can we
create the illusion for the moment that we're not alone.
- Orson Welles

The distinction between the past, present and future
is only a stubbornly persistent illusion.
- Albert Einstein

Love can sometimes be magic.
But magic can sometimes...
just be an illusion.
- Javan

Decorate your home.
It gives the illusion that your life is more interesting than it really is.
- Charles M. Schulz

Baseball is a game where a curve is an optical illusion,
a screwball can be a pitch or a person,
stealing is legal and you can spit anywhere you like
except in the umpire's eye or on the ball.
- James Patrick Murray

What if it were only an illusion?
Perhaps life is not as threatening as it appears.
Perhaps the greatest threat to our serenity
is our fear of the future -
our fear of the unknown.
Perhaps, as Franklin D. Roosevelt said,
"The Only Thing We Have to Fear Is Fear Itself."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The problem with our role is Americans live in a world of illusion.
- Talib Kweli

There is the illusion of the world and the reality of the Torah.
- Meir Kahane

Lovers of air travel find it exhilarating to hang poised
between the illusion of immortality and the fact of death.
- Alexander Chase

What staggers me is not the persistence of illusion,
but the persistence of the world in the face of illusion.
- A. G. Mojtabai

The occupation and robbery of a nation occurs under
the illusion of freeing its citizens from brutal oppression.
- Ramman Kenoun

The time has come to stop beating our heads against
stone walls under the illusion that we have been appointed
policeman to the human race.
- Walter Lippmann

I came down to the living room one day and my wife
was standing in the living room.
It wasn't an illusion.
I saw her out of the corner of my eye.
The moment I saw her, she vanished.
- Hugh Leonard

Belief in the absence of illusions is itself an illusion.
- Barbara Grizzuti Harrison

Ugly.
Is irrelevant.
It is an immeasurable insult to a woman,
and then supposedly the worst crime you can commit as a woman.
But ugly, as beautiful, is an illusion.
- Margaret Cho

The illusion that times that were are better than those that are,
has probably pervaded all ages.
- Horace Greeley

What is called a sincere work is one that is endowed
with enough strength to give reality to an illusion.
- Max Jacob

Tradition is the illusion of permanance.
- Woody Allen

Romantic love is an illusion.
Most of us discover this truth at the end of a love
affair or else when the sweet emotions of love lead
us into marriage and then turn down their flames.
- Thomas Moore

We have an illusion of security, we don't have security.
- Isaac Yeffet

If you can talk brilliantly about a problem,
it can create the consoling illusion that it has been mastered.
- Stanley Kubrick

How strange when an illusion dies.
It's as though you've lost a child.
- Judy Garland

The experiences of promoting my first album were really something;
there is so much illusion in my environment (touring
and pop music) that I wanted to clear away.
- Duncan Sheik

For you who no longer posses it, freedom is everything,
for us who do, it is merely an illusion.
- Emile M. Cioran

Lost Illusion is the undisclosed title of every novel.
- Andre Maurois

Being a famous actress may give you a sense of being important,
but believe me, it's just an illusion.
- Juliette Binoche

The time of illusion, then, is the beautiful moment of passion;
it represents the artistic zone in which the poet or
romance writer ought to be free to do the very best that he can.
- Lafcadio Hearn

Painting is an illusion, a piece of magic,
so what you see is not what you see.
- Philip Guston

I'm not under too much of an illusion of how smart
or un-smart I am because filmmaking ultimately is about teamwork.
- Guy Ritchie

Only here, because of the illusion of intellectualism,
our society separates the validity of human expression.
- Joseph Jarman

Everything is Song.
Everything is Silence.
Since it all turns out to be illusion,
perfectly being what it is, having nothing to do with good or bad,
you are free to die laughing.
- James Broughton

Progress is not an illusion, it happens,
but it is slow and invariably disappointing.
- George Orwell

We must select the illusion which appeals to our temperament,
and embrace it with passion, if we want to be happy.
- Cyril Connolly

A poor man with nothing in his belly needs hope,
illusion, more than bread.
- Georges Bernanos

And, hey, I'm not under the illusion that everything's
just going to be hunky-dory work wise forever.
I've never been under that illusion.
Things could go away tomorrow.
- Mel Gibson

Religion is an illusion and it derives its strength
from the fact that it falls in with our instinctual desires.
- Sigmund Freud

If time is not real, then the dividing line between this world and eternity,
between suffering and bliss, between good and evil,
is also an illusion.
- Herman Hesse

You too must not count too much on your reality as you feel it today,
since like yesterday, it may prove an illusion for you tomorrow.
- Luigi Pirandello

I have, alas, only one illusion left,
and that is the Archbishop of Canterbury.
- Sydney Smith

Art has a double face, of expression and illusion,
just like science has a double face:
the reality of error and the phantom of truth.
- Publilius Syrus

Anything I've done up till May 27th 1999 was kind of an illusion,
existing without living.
My daughter, the birth of my daughter,
gave me life.
- Johnny Depp

Since fame is an illusion and death is in our future
all we have is the next moment before we are swallowed into oblivion.
- Al Goldstein

Free will is an illusion.
People always choose the perceived path of greatest pleasure.
- Scott Adams

The world is real.
Consciousness is the illusion.
- Craig Bruce

Allowing children to spew forth whatever is on their
minds in the name of openness only creates an illusion of family closeness.
- Neil Kurshan

Law not served by power is an illusion;
but power not ruled by law is a menace which our nuclear age cannot afford.
- Arthur J. Goldberg

Unlike any other business in the United States,
sports must preserve an illusion of perfect innocence.
- Lewis H. Lapham

Photography, as we all know, is not real at all.
It is an illusion of reality with which we create our own private world.
- Arnold Newman

A logical analysis of reflexive usages in French shows,
however, that this simplicity is an illusion and that,
so far from helping the foreigner, it is more calculated to bother him.
- Edward Sapir

It's really easy to get colors right.
It's really hard to get black - and neutrals -
right.
Black is certainly a color but it's also an illusion.
- Donna Karan

Because you know, down deep in my heart,
when all is said and done, I still live under the illusion
that basically people think of me as an up-and-coming young actor.
- Jack Nicholson

Everything's fine today, that is our illusion.
- Voltaire

Models are there to look like mannequins,
not like real people.
Art and illusion are supposed to be fantasy.
- Grace Jones

Whatever is a reality today, whatever you touch and
believe in and that seems real for you today,
is going to be - like the reality of yesterday -
an illusion tomorrow.
- Luigi Pirandello

The preserve of ambition and folly in pursuit of illusion,
or delusion.
- Derek Jarman

Illusion is needed to disguise the emptiness within.
- Arthur Erickson

Illusion is the first of all pleasures.
- Voltaire

Infinite love is the only truth.
Everything else is illusion.
- David Icke


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