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Let these funny Imposed Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
At the Core of Our Suffering
are those Self-Imposed Limitations (Assumptions)
of which We are Completely Unaware.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
There is a secret wisdom-of-the-ages
that holds the key to breaking
our cycle of self-imposed suffering.
The secret wisdom is,
"Life is not supposed to be fair."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I do not believe that God has
imposed suffering upon anyone
to punish them or to teach them a lesson.
- Ernest Holmes
A person experiences life as
something separated from the rest -
a kind of optical delusion of consciousness.
Our task must be to free ourselves
from this self-imposed prison,
and through compassion,
to find the reality of Oneness.
- Albert Einstein
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There is a secret wisdom-of-the-ages
that holds the key to breaking our
cycle of self-imposed suffering.
The secret wisdom is, "Life is not supposed to be fair."
This is not sad news. This is GLORIOUS news!
Life is not broken. Nothing is wrong.
God has not failed, died, or gone on vacation.
The world is working perfectly. We just misunderstood.
Somewhere along the way, someone got the idea that
life was "supposed" to be "fair,"
and all the trouble started -
expectation, disappointment, resentment, anger -
a whole cycle of suffering that began
with the belief that life is "supposed" to be "fair."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The only limits in our life are those we impose on ourselves.
- Bob Proctor
Never impose on others what
you would not choose for yourself.
- Confucius (Ancient Chinese)
Love allows your beloved the freedom to be unlike you.
Attachment asks for conformity to your needs and desires.
Love imposes no demands.
Attachment expresses an overwhelming demand - "Make me feel whole."
Love expands beyond the limits of two people.
Attachment tries to exclude everything but two people.
- Deepak Chopra in The Path to Love
The first sigh of love is the last breath of wisdom.
- Anonymous
Love is an irresistible desire
to be irresistibly desired.
- Robert Frost
Love conquers all things except poverty and a toothache.
- Mae West
Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another.
- H. L. Mencken
I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner
In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland
Love is like an hourglass,
with the heart filling up as the brain empties.
- Jules Renard
Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter
quite like unrequited love.
- Charlie Brown in Charles M. Schulz' Peanuts comic
Men always want to be a woman's first love -
women like to be a man's last romance.
- Oscar Wilde
Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.
- H. L. Mencken
Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
- H. L. Mencken
Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
- Albert Einstein
Save a boyfriend for a rainy day -
and another, in case it doesn't rain.
- Mae West
My wife ran off with my best friend, and I sure do miss him.
- Anonymous
A relationship, I think, is like a shark.
You know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies.
And I think what we got on our hands is a dead shark.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall (1977)
Love looks through a telescope;
envy, through a microscope.
- Josh Billings
True love is like ghosts,
which everyone talks about and few have seen.
- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
A woman in love can't be reasonable -
or she probably wouldn't be in love.
- Mae West
Love is a grave mental disease.
- Plato
Love is what makes two people
sit in the middle of a park bench
when there is plenty of room at both ends.
- Anonymous
Love thy neighbor -
and if he happens to be tall,
debonair and devastating,
it will be that much easier.
- Mae West
My boyfriend and I broke up.
He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.
- Rita Rudner
When you are courting a nice girl
an hour seems like a second.
When you sit on a red-hot cinder
a second seems like an hour.
That's relativity.
- Albert Einstein
One's first love is always perfect
until one meets one's second love.
- Elizabeth Aston
The feeling of friendship is like that
of being comfortably filled with roast beef;
love, like being enlivened with champagne.
- Samuel Johnson
Oh, come on, Shrek, wake up and smell the pheromones!
- the movie Shrek (2001)
Love is metaphysical gravity.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
True love comes quietly,
without banners or flashing lights.
If you hear bells, get your ears checked.
- Erich Segal
The only true love is love at first sight;
second sight dispels it.
- Israel Zangwill
The Wedding March always reminds me of the music
played when soldiers go into battle.
- Heinrich Heine
Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein
A honeymoon should be like a table:
four bare legs and no drawers.
- Anonymous
I love to shop after a bad relationship.
I don't know. I buy a new outfit
and it makes me feel better. It just does.
Sometimes I see a really great outfit,
I'll break up with someone on purpose.
- Rita Rudner
Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth
until the hour of separation.
- Khalil Gibran
Love is only a dirty trick played on us
to achieve continuation of the species.
- W. Somerset Maugham
Love is loving what your lover loves.
- Anonymous
I'd like to kiss ya, but I just washed ma hair.
- the movie The Cabin in the Cotton
I want a girl just like good old mom,
who is different in every way.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Look your best - who said love is blind?
- Mae West
This is my ultimate fantasy:
watching QVC with a credit card
while making love and eating at the same time.
- Yasmine Bleeth
Life is a reflection of intent.
Love reflects love.
Hate reflects hate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Love does not claim possession, but gives freedom.
- Rabindranath Tagore
The most important words in the English language
are not "I love you" but "It's benign."
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
A big part of letting go is recognizing
when it is time to stay in a situation
and when it is time to move on.
- Darren L. Johnson
New Yorkers love it when you spill your guts out there.
Spill your guts at Wimbledon and they make you stop and clean it up.
- Jimmy Carter
Love means not ever having to say you're sorry.
- Erich Segal
Use the power of your word
in the direction of truth and love.
- don Miguel Ruiz
I'm not talking about lust.
A woman in lust wants chocolate.
A woman in love wants diamonds.
- the movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
We are finally driven to monogamy
not by morality but by exhaustion.
- Erica Jong
Love comforteth like sunshine after rain.
- William Shakespeare
Jealousy is all the fun you think they had.
- Erica Jong
Beauty without grace is the hook without the bait.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Getting divorced just because you don't love a man
is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
Beauty is the bait which with delight
allures man to enlarge his kind.
- Socrates
When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.
- Mark Twain
Love one another but make not a bond of love.
Let it rather be a moving sea
between the shores of your souls.
- Khalil Gibran
To the people who love you,
you are beautiful already.
This is not because they're
blind to your shortcomings
but because they so clearly see your soul.
- Victoria Moran
He who marries for love without money
has good nights and sorry days.
- Anonymous
Love is when the other person's happiness
is more important than your own.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
True love is a process of co-creation
in which neither feels ownership or superiority.
Jealousy is a highly destructive force
for love and relationships.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Do you feel stuck?
Whether in a project, a job, a relationship,
or some other situation,
there is a time for perseverance,
and a time for letting go and moving on.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If (s)he's an apple and you're an orange,
celebrate your differences -
make a great fruit salad.
Love isn't about being the same -
it's about being sweet with each other.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
This day I will marry my friend,
the one I laugh with, live for, dream with, love.
- Anonymous
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.