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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Breaking Quotes
Funny Quotes about Breaking

Let these funny Breaking Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

You can't make an omelet without breaking eggs.
- Anonymous

Breaking up is a natural evolution
when you try to figure out what you want in life.
If you're with an individual
who isn't moving in the same direction
and at the same rate that you are,
it ain't going to work.
- Usher Raymond

There is a secret wisdom-of-the-ages
that holds the key to breaking
our cycle of self-imposed suffering.
The secret wisdom is,
"Life is not supposed to be fair."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The secret of getting ahead is getting started.
The secret of getting started is
breaking your complex overwhelming tasks
into small manageable tasks,
and starting on the first one.
- Mark Twain


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Your pain is the breaking of the shell
that encloses your understanding.
- Khalil Gibran

Your pain is the breaking of the shell
that encloses your understanding.
Much of your pain is self-chosen.
It is the bitter potion by which the
physician within you heals your sick self.
Therefore trust the physician, and drink
his remedy in silence and tranquility.
- Khalil Gibran

There is a secret wisdom-of-the-ages
that holds the key to breaking our
cycle of self-imposed suffering.
The secret wisdom is, "Life is not supposed to be fair."
This is not sad news. This is GLORIOUS news!
Life is not broken. Nothing is wrong.
God has not failed, died, or gone on vacation.
The world is working perfectly. We just misunderstood.
Somewhere along the way, someone got the idea that
life was "supposed" to be "fair,"
and all the trouble started -
expectation, disappointment, resentment, anger -
a whole cycle of suffering that began
with the belief that life is "supposed" to be "fair."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


 

I love to shop after a bad relationship.
I don't know. I buy a new outfit
and it makes me feel better. It just does.
Sometimes I see a really great outfit,
I'll break up with someone on purpose.
- Rita Rudner

She drove me to drink.
That's the one thing I'm indebted to her for.
- the movie Never Give a Sucker an Even Break

I was born on the prairies where the wind blew free
and there was nothing to break the light of the sun.
I was born where there were no enclosures.
- Geronimo

Revenge... is like a rolling stone,
which, when a man hath forced up a hill,
will return upon him with a greater violence,
and break those bones whose sinews gave it motion.
- Albert Schweitzer

When you break up, your whole identity is
shattered. It's like death.
- Dennis Quaid

Life is short,
Break the Rules.
Forgive quickly,
Kiss SLOWLY.
Love truly.
Laugh uncontrollably
And never regret
ANYTHING
That makes you smile
- Mark Twain

We all go through life bristling
at our external limitations,
but the most difficult chains
to break are inside us.
- Bradley Whitford

If the machine of government is of such a nature
that it requires you to be the agent of injustice to another,
then, I say, break the law.
- Henry David Thoreau

Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly.
- Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama

It is easier to prevent bad habits than to break them.
- Benjamin Franklin

Keep close to Nature's heart...
and break clear away, once in awhile,
and climb a mountain or spend a week in the woods.
Wash your spirit clean.
- John Muir

All that is necessary to break the spell
of inertia and frustration is this:
Act as if it were impossible to fail.
- Dorthea Brande

Like a bird in flight, your life can soar
above the troubles of the world.
Breathe deep, choose, and break the shackles of your past.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Our loved ones -
whether by blood, by marriage, or by choice -
are delicate treasures.
If we hold them too close, they break -
as a butterfly would.
By honoring and enjoying
the freedom of our loved ones,
we gain our own freedom.
Have the courage to trust that
the beautiful butterflies of your life
will return - or not - as life intends.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Count your blessings. Once you realize
how valuable you are and how much you have going for you,
the smiles will return, the sun will break out,
the music will play, and you will finally
be able to move forward the life that God intended
for you with grace, strength, courage, and confidence.
- Og Mandino

For those men who, sooner or later, are lucky enough
to break away from the pack, the most intoxicating moment
comes when they cease being bodies in other men's command
and find that they control their own time,
when they learn their own voice and authority.
- Theodore H. White

You can learn how to let go of the past.
Whether you have experienced a break up
with someone you cared for deeply,
whether death has taken a loved one,
whether you have had a feud with a friend or family member,
whether you have lost a job.
Move on and let go.
Life can be joyful and rewarding again.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Sticks and stones may break my bones,
but words will never hurt me.
- schoolyard rhyme

The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life.
Attitude to me is more important than facts.
It is more important than the past, than education, than money,
than circumstances, than failures, than success,
than what other people think or say or do.
It is more important than appearance, gift, or skill.
It will make or break a company ... a church ... a home.
The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day
regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day.
We cannot change our past ...
we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way.
We cannot change the inevitable.
The only thing we can do is play on the string we have,
and that is our attitude.
I am convinced that life is 10 percent what happens to me
and 90 percent how I react to it.
And so it is with you ...
we are in charge of our attitudes.
- Charles Swindoll

Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed.
But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops.
Uh, depending on the breaks.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove

Thaw with her gentle persuasion is more powerful
than Thor with his hammer.
The one melts, the other breaks into pieces.
- Henry David Thoreau

Maybe I could have loved you better.
Maybe you should have loved me more.
Maybe our hearts were just next in line.
Maybe everything breaks sometime.
- Jewel

Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo,
but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you
when the limo breaks down.
- Oprah Winfrey

Nature never breaks her own laws.
- Leonardo da Vinci

There is nothing more dreadful than the habit of doubt.
Doubt separates people.
It is a poison that disintegrates
friendships and breaks up pleasant relations.
It is a thorn that irritates and hurts;
it is a sword that kills.
- The Buddha

An individual who breaks a law that
conscience tells him is unjust,
and who willingly accepts the penalty of imprisonment
in order to arouse the conscience
of the community over its injustice,
is in reality expressing the highest respect for the law.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

I submit that an individual who breaks the law
that conscience tells him is unjust
and willingly accepts the penalty by staying in jail
to arouse the conscience of the community over its injustice,
is in reality expressing the very highest respect for law.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

One who breaks an unjust law
that conscience tells him is unjust,
and who willingly accepts
the penalty of imprisonment
in order to arouse the conscience
of the community over its injustice,
is in reality expressing the highest respect for law.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Mothers all want their sons to grow up to be president,
but they don't want them to become politicians in the process.
- John F. Kennedy

Some years ago I became president of Columbia University
and learned within 24 hours to be ready
to speak at the drop of a hat,
and I learned something more, the trustees were expected
to be ready to speak at the passing of the hat.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

Well, when you come down to it,
I don't see that a reporter could do much to a president, do you?
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

Oh, that lovely title, ex-president.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

Campaign behavior for wives:
Always be on time.
Do as little talking as humanly possible.
Lean back in the parade car
so everybody can see the president.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

People make a big fuss over you when you're President.
But I'm very serious about doing everything I can
to make sure that it doesn't go to my head.
- Jimmy Carter

If anyone is crazy enough to want to kill
a president of the United States, he can do it.
All he must be prepared to do is give his life for the president's.
- John F. Kennedy

In my country we go to prison first, and then become President.
- Nelson Mandela

We must make it clear that a platform
of "I hate gay men and women'
is not a way to become president of the United States.
- Jimmy Carter

I look forward to these confrontations with the press
to kind of balance up the nice and pleasant things
that come to me as president.
- Jimmy Carter

I am not the Catholic candidate for President.
I am the Democratic Party's candidate for President,
who happens also to be a Catholic.
- John F. Kennedy

I think this is the most extraordinary
collection of talent, of human knowledge,
that has ever been gathered at the White House -
with the possible exception of
when Thomas Jefferson dined alone.
- John F. Kennedy

Any man who wants to be president
is either an egomaniac or crazy.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

You know, everybody makes mistakes when they are president.
- William J. Clinton

Allow the president to invade a neighboring nation,
whenever he shall deem it necessary to repel an invasion,
and you allow him to do so whenever he may choose
to say he deems it necessary for such a purpose -
and you allow him to make war at pleasure.
- Abraham Lincoln

The being of our mothers is forever branded onto our own being.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Men are what their mothers made them.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

God could not be everywhere, so he created mothers.
- Jewish Proverb

I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner

Personally, I'm always ready to learn,
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill

I don't want to move to a city where the only cultural advantage
is being able to make a right turn on a red light.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall

There's nothing wrong with being afraid.
We were meant to be afraid.
- the Woody Allen movie Anything Else

Hey, Marge. Isn't it great being married
to someone who's recklessly impulsive?
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)

I am always ready to learn
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill

Happiness is often the result of being too busy to be miserable.
- Anonymous

Being a leader is like being a lady,
if you have to go around telling people you are one, you aren't.
- Margaret Thatcher

The feeling of friendship is like that
of being comfortably filled with roast beef;
love, like being enlivened with champagne.
- Samuel Johnson

The only advantage of not being too good a housekeeper
is that your guests are so pleased
to feel how very much better they are.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

If at first you don't succeed,
try, try, and try again.
Then give up.
There's no use being a damned fool about it.
- W. C. Fields

Creationists make it sound as though a "theory'
is something you dreamt up after being drunk all night.
- Isaac Asimov

Boys will be boys. And even that wouldn't matter
if only we could prevent girls from being girls.
- Anne Frank

This report, by its very length, defends itself
against the risk of being read.
- Winston Churchill

The length of this document defends it well
against the risk of its being read.
- Winston Churchill

This being grown up isn't all it's cracked up to be.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Guilt for being rich,
and guilt thinking that perhaps love and peace isn't enough
and you have to go and get shot or something.
- John Lennon

Honor your being,
Release each and every struggle,
Gather strength from life's storms,
Relax into the arms of spirit.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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