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How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days Quotes
Funny Quotes by How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days

Let these funny How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days Quotes lighten up your life. And check out the humorous quotes of many more funny authors in my large collection.

I'm not talking about lust.
A woman in lust wants chocolate.
A woman in love wants diamonds.
- the movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand PHOTO

It's not the size of the dog in the fight,
it's the size of the fight in the dog.
- Mark Twain PHOTO

Live life on the edge, not with an edge.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie PHOTO


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Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer PHOTO

If you are not one of us, you are one of them.
- the movie The Matrix (1999) PHOTO

"It's not that important,
don't worry about it" is the answer,
now what was the question?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie PHOTO


 

Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.
- Will Rogers

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous

If at first you don't succeed,
skydiving is not for you.
- Anonymous

Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West

The key is, to not think of death as an end,
but as more of a very effective way to cut down on your expenses.
- the movie Love and Death

Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire

No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous

DON'T get officious.
You're not yourself when you're officious -
That is the curse of a government job.
- the movie Harold and Maude (1971)

It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel

Personally, I'm always ready to learn,
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill

Yeah I called her up. She gave me a bunch of ...
about me not listening to her, or something.
I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.
- the movie Dumb & Dumber (1994)

Two things are infinite:
the universe and human stupidity;
and I'm not sure about the universe.
- Albert Einstein

I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln

In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland

Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed.
But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops.
Uh, depending on the breaks.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove

Damn it boss, I like you too much not to say it.
You've got everything except one thing: madness!
- the movie Zorba The Greek

Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
- Albert Einstein

I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
- Anonymous

I'm not used to feeling so human.
Is it always like this?
- Edward, from Twilight Saga by Stephenie Meyer

One does not leave a convivial party before closing time.
- Winston Churchill

When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.
- Mark Twain

Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein

Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again.
- Robert A. Heinlein

Marriage is a fine institution -
but I'm not ready for an institution yet.
- Mae West

The most important words in the English language
are not "I love you" but "It's benign."
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

Do not speak to me of rules.
This is war! This is not a game of cricket!
- from the movie The Bridge On The River Kwai

Science is a wonderful thing
if one does not have to earn one's living at it.
- Albert Einstein

There is no use whatsoever trying to help
people who do not help themselves.
You cannot push anyone up a ladder
unless he is willing to climb himself.
- Andrew Carnegie

The objection to Puritans is not that
they try to make us think as they do,
but that they try to make us do as they think.
- H. L. Mencken

If you can not answer a man's argument,
all is not lost; you can still call him vile names.
- Elbert Hubbard

I do not believe that civilization will be wiped out
in a war fought with the atomic bomb.
Perhaps two-thirds of the people of the earth will be killed.
- Albert Einstein

As far as the laws of mathematics
refer to reality, they are not certain,
and as far as they are certain,
they do not refer to reality.
- Albert Einstein

I think that there is nothing, not even crime,
more opposed to poetry, to philosophy, ay, to life itself
than this incessant business.
- Henry David Thoreau

I am not young enough to know everything.
- Oscar Wilde

If you ask me anything I don't know,
I'm not going to answer.
- Yogi Berra

Silence is not always a Sign of Wisdom,
but Babbling is ever a folly.
- Benjamin Franklin

Genius may have its limitations,
but stupidity is not thus handicapped.
- Elbert Hubbard

It's not a mess.
It's a physical manifestation of
a wonderfully complex ability to
assess and compartmentalize information.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

The existence of an anthropomorphic
"Father-figure" deity is not impossible,
merely exceptionally improbable and illogical.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The church is always trying to get other people to reform;
it might not be a bad idea to reform itself a little,
by way of example.
- Mark Twain

There is no pleasure in having nothing to do;
the fun is in having lots to do and not doing it.
- Mary Wilson Little

The lawyer's truth is not Truth,
but consistency or a consistent expediency.
- Henry David Thoreau

Contrary to general belief,
I do not believe that friends are necessarily
the people you like best,
they are merely the people who got there first.
- Peter Ustinov

The rich are not born skeptical or cynical.
They are made that way by events, circumstances.
- Paul Getty

Belief is not the beginning but the end of all knowledge.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

One minute you're in the lunchroom at Glenwood High
and you ... blink and you're 40,
you blink again and you can see movies
at half price on a senior citizen's pass.
Ask not for whom the bell tolls, or to put it more accurately,
ask not for whom the toilet flushes.
- the Woody Allen movie Celebrity

Confused Memories of Childhood:
Hate to my father, cruel hate,
confused with love - a mix not great.
The man I love - the man I hate;
the man I want to emulate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The wine of youth does not always
clear with advancing years;
sometimes it grows turbid.
- Carl Jung

When I want to be bold about my movement ...
I for sure do not call it exercise!
- Mary Anne Radmacher

What sane person could live in this world and not be crazy?
- Ursula K. Le Guin

Although personally I am quite content with existing explosives,
I feel we must not stand in the path of improvement.
- Winston Churchill

Morality which depends upon the helplessness
of a man or woman has not much to recommend it.
Morality is rooted in the purity of our hearts.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

When dealing with people, remember you are
not dealing with creatures of logic,
but creatures of emotion.
- Dale Carnegie

I'm sure we all agree that we ought to love one another
and I know there are people in the world
that do not love their fellow human beings
and I HATE people like that.
- Tom Lehrer

Normal is not something to aspire to,
it's something to get away from.
- Jodie Foster

It is only the poor who pay cash,
and that not from virtue,
but because they are refused credit.
- Anatole France

I am always ready to learn
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill

A ship in harbor is safe -
but that is not what ships are for.
- John A. Shedd

Life is never fair, and perhaps it is a good thing
for most of us that it is not.
- Oscar Wilde

Only two things are infinite,
the universe and human stupidity,
and I'm not sure about the former.
- Albert Einstein

People who say it cannot be done should not
interrupt those who are doing it.
- George Bernard Shaw

One does not discover new lands without consenting
to lose sight of the shore for a very long time.
- Andre Gide

The only advantage of not being too good a housekeeper
is that your guests are so pleased
to feel how very much better they are.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

I do not fear death.
I had been dead for billions and billions
of years before I was born,
and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it.
- Mark Twain


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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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