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Let these funny Jewelry Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Will the people in the cheaper seats clap your hands?
And the rest of you, if you'll just rattle your jewelry.
- John Lennon
I think men who have a pierced ear
are better prepared for marriage.
They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
- Rita Rudner
I wanted to see exotic Vietnam, the jewel of Southeast Asia.
I, uh, I wanted to meet interesting
and stimulating people of an ancient culture,
and kill them.
- the movie Full Metal Jacket
People living their lives for you on TV;
They say they're better than you, and you agree.
- Jewel
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Love bravely, live bravely, be courageous,
there's really nothing to lose.
- Jewel
Maybe I could have loved you better.
Maybe you should have loved me more.
Maybe our hearts were just next in line.
Maybe everything breaks sometime.
- Jewel
I was thinking that I might fly today.
Just to disprove all the things you say...
please be careful with me, I'm sensitive,
and I'd like to stay that way.
- Jewel
I'd rather see the world from another angle
- Jewel
In case you failed to notice,
in case you failed to see,
this is my heart,
bleeding before you,
this is me down on my knees.
- Jewel
Suffering is everywhere. Don't ever think it isn't.
So are miracles. Don't ever think they aren't.
- Jewel
I'm half alive but I feel mostly dead.
- Jewel
I adore the human experience
- Jewel
My whole goal is to keep my spirit intact.
If that doesn't happen, none of this is worth it.
- Jewel
The things you fear are undefeatable,
not by their nature, but by your approach.
- Jewel
Show me a man who knows his own heart
and to him I shall belong.
- Jewel
I'm becoming more and more myself with time.
I guess that's what grace is.
The refinement of your soul through time.
- Jewel
I have this theory - that if we're told we're bad,
then that's the only ideal we'll ever have.
- Jewel
In silence you hear who you are becoming.
You create yourself.
- Jewel
I get bored very easily, ...
I have a voracious appetite and I do not feel alive
if I'm repeating something I'm good at.
So I'm always looking for new challenges.
- Jewel
What we call human nature in actuality is human habit.
- Jewel
Forgiveness is the needle that knows how to mend.
- Jewel
Another day, another dollar, another war, another tower
Went up where the homeless had their home.
- Jewel
I will gather myself around my faith,
for light does the darkness most fear.
- Jewel
I love the contradictions of people
- Jewel
Innocence isn't ever lost completely;
we just need to maintain our goodness to regain it.
- Jewel
Who will save your soul if you won't save you own?
- Jewel
I'm having a bad day. I am not size six.
My legs are not skinny as sticks,
and dammit, someone's got to pay.
I'm afraid that I can't satisfy myself
and that my happiness depends on someone else.
I feel weak, so you're gonna take the fall.
You're so shallow.
- Jewel
Through Love and through Beauty, we achieve immortality.
- Jewel (paraphrasing Plato)
Being part of the natural world reminds me
that innocence isn't ever lost completely;
we just need to maintain our goodness to regain it.
- Jewel
Ride With the Devil.
- Jewel
Your life becomes what you believe.
- Jewel
Lend your voices only to sounds of freedom,
no longer lend your strength to that
which you wish to be free from.
Fill your life with love and bravery,
and you shall live a life uncommon.
- Jewel
Reality is what you believe it to be.
It's what you put your thought and energy into,
because your hands physically manifest thought.
So your world becomes what you feel and what you think.
- Jewel
Love bravely, live bravely, be courageous;
there's really nothing to lose.
There's no wrong you can't make right again,
so be kinder to yourself;
have fun, take chances. There are no bounds.
- Jewel
If I could tell the world just one thing
it would be we're all okay,
and not to worry cause worry is wasteful
and useless in times like these.
I won't be made useless.
I won't be idle with despair,
I will gather myself around my faith.
Light does the darkness most fear.
- Jewel
You have to realize: OK, I don't know how
to solve a political problem,
I don't know how to solve the pollution problem...
all I know is in my own life,
I need to figure out some sense of purpose,
I need to figure out how to be happy...
and I'm willing.
- Jewel
You always feel better when you sing.
Music touches people's hearts.
You know, it doesn't go through your mental capacity,
it just moves you and it will let you cry.
It's worth it doing a show
and when you touch a crowd
and move yourself at the same
- Jewel
Gather yourself by the sea shore and I will love you there.
Assemble yourself with wild things,
with songs of the sparrow and sea-foam.
Let mad beauty collect itself in your eyes
and it will shine - Calling me.
For I long for a man with nests of wild things in his hair.
A man who will Kiss the Flame.
- Jewel
I've always had a love for poetry,
and when I got signed to a record label I thought,
"How odd that I'm doing a record before a book of poetry."
- Jewel
There are people selling thoughtlessness with such casualty.
- Jewel
We all should choose our friends carefully.
I used to think that no one could know me better than somebody else,
because you're inside yourself, your body, you can't see yourself.
If you think like that, you surround yourself with
other people who are willing to tell you who you are,
which are usually judgmental people ...
we should really surround ourselves with the ones
that adore us and believe in the highest of us.
- Jewel
I have often wanted to drown my troubles,
but I can't get my wife to go swimming.
- Anonymous
My boyfriend and I broke up.
He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.
- Rita Rudner
After fifteen minutes I wanted to marry her,
and after half an hour
I completely gave up the idea of stealing her purse.
- the movie Take the Money and Run (1969)
Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind. "Pooh?" he whispered.
"Yes, Piglet?"
"Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's hand.
"I just wanted to be sure of you."
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
In my prayers I never said I needed a home.
I said I wanted a sanctuary.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Some people wanted champagne and caviar
when they should have had beer and hot dogs.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
A somebody was once a nobody who wanted to and did.
- John Burroughs
Even the rich are hungry for love,
for being cared for, for being wanted,
for having someone to call their own.
- Mother Teresa
In all our contacts, it is probably the sense
of being really needed and wanted
which gives us the greatest satisfaction
and creates the most lasting bond.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
Sometimes you get the results you wanted,
sometimes you don't.
What matters is that you did your best.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Today is the right day to do
what you have long wanted to do.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I wanted to know the name of every stone
and flower and insect and bird and beast.
I wanted to know where it got its color, where it got its life -
but there was no one to tell me.
- George Washington Carver
I wanted to be a doctor that I might be able to work
without having to talk
because for years I had been giving myself out in words.
- Albert Schweitzer
Too often we... enjoy the comfort of opinion
without the discomfort of thought.
- John F. Kennedy
People say conversation is a lost art;
how often I have wished it were.
- Edward R. Murrow
If you refuse to accept anything but the best,
you very often get it.
- Somerset Maugham
Happiness is often the result of being too busy to be miserable.
- Anonymous
Money often costs too much.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The worst government is often the most moral.
One composed of cynics is often very tolerant and humane.
But when fanatics are on top there is no limit to oppression.
- H. L. Mencken
Rules are mostly made to be broken
and are too often for the lazy to hide behind.
- Douglas MacArthur
Too often the strong, silent man is silent only because
he does not know what to say, and is reputed strong
only because he has remained silent.
- Winston Churchill
Do not laugh much or often or unrestrainedly.
- Epictetus
In the course of my life, I have often had to eat my words,
and I must confess that I have always found it a wholesome diet.
- Winston Churchill
Today is your day to laugh at life,
laugh at what's funny - laugh at what's sad,
laugh loud - laugh often,
laugh at me - laugh at you - laugh at life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
One of the annoying things about believing in free will
and individual responsibility is the difficulty
of finding somebody to blame your problems on.
And when you do find somebody, it's remarkable
how often his picture turns up on your driver's license.
- P. J. O'Rourke
The darkest night is often the bridge to the brightest tomorrow.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Worry often gives a small thing a big shadow.
- Swedish Proverb
The price of freedom for a nation is lives and money.
Often, the price of freedom for an individual
is challenging the closed minds of family and friend.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Intense feeling too often obscures the truth.
- Harry S. Truman
It is often easier to ask for forgiveness
than to ask for permission.
- Grace Hopper
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.